Season 4, Episode 13, “Bark At The Moon”

Holy moley, it seems like this season is dragging for me. I thought I was about to finish and I’m about half way through it. But fuck it, lets go with another review of Degrassi.

Pre-Credit Opener: Spinner is busy as hell at The Dot waiting tables while Manny is there waiting for him. Spinner gives her a kiss and we can all tell he wants to talk to her for a bit, but she sounds like an idiot going on about a horrible stupid song that just came on the jukebox. Right away we find out what this episode is going to be about. Spinner wants to be official with her, while Manny just wants a fuck buddy.

In the next scene Manny is giving a tour to a new kid who looks like he’s from the great, great north of Canada. He asks if she’s giving the tour because of Rick being killed, but she says, actually, I have no idea what the reason was and I’m too lazy to rewind it. Really who cares? Oh lord, the new kid’s name is Chester and she introduces him to Craig. Lucky for him he’s now medicated or else he would have beat his ass like he did Joey in the previous episode. Chester fucks off to eat some burritos while Craig has a talk with Manny. He apologizes for acting the way he did because he was a raging maniac at the time and he would have done things differently because their relationship was nothing but pain. Manny of course get’s highly offended by this and leaves in a huff. She still doesn’t get that she was just the side piece and there really wasn’t anything there.

In the hall way Paige and Marco are having a mini freak out because they’ve both been called up to the office. Paige grabs Manny and tells her to have a meeting with Raditch instead of her and she just leaves abruptly. Paige meanwhile goes to talk to the student teacher where she flirts with him some more but not before apologizing to him for seeing him at some bar. Conveniently he lets her know that his cunty girlfriend Charlie is now his ex. Paige being horny and desperate says that he’s probably her brother’s age and if he can bang Marco than Mr Wonderful here can totally get it on with Paige. He says that he can’t because he’s a teacher.

Outside the principles office Raditch comes out and tells Marco and Manny that he’s been reassigned to another school, meaning fired and the new principle is in his former office waiting for them. I do have to point out that when it came to the whole Rick thing, he really did fuck that up big time. Especially how he just blew him off. Anyways, they go into the office and Mrs Hatzilakos is now the principle, what a random person I swear. She goes on to say that she’s going to approve JT and Liberty’s stupid Dracula play and mentions that the school needs new great ideas to get their minds off of the fact that Rick is dead as a door nail and Jimmy is a cripple.

In the hallway again, Manny is telling Emma how Mrs Hotass wants a huge event to bring everyone’s spirits up and asks Emma for help, but Emma is still depressed about Rick wanting to murder her. Spinner comes along and gives Manny a stuffed animal and makes her happy. He brings her down about talking about being in a relationship and she leaves without giving an answer.

Outside the school, Manny and Marco are leaning towards having a dance. Chester comes by and says that everyone loves a school dance and that they can do a cupid thing by having a computer pair people up. Right away he flirts with Manny about having a dance with her and you can tell that her hormones are going into overdrive for his moley face. On the video announcements the next day Manny is telling everyone about the dance and how it’s going to work.

In yoga class Marco is giving Paige shit about wanting to be with the student teacher. But oh, it’s Mrs Kwan’s class now because Mr O has a huge workload and he doesn’t have time for that stupid shit. Of course he really didn’t want to do it anymore because Paige is just too in his face about wanting to be with him.

In the MI lab Chester is talking to Manny about the stupid dance and he asks her questions for the pairing. That’s when he asks her if she has a boyfriend and she tells him no, not anyone serious. Poor Spinner, but that’s what happens when you try to get with a ho. She tells him to put in his name and they’re a match of course. Just then Spinner spots them and interrupts their flirting.

Outside he asks her what she’s thinking about and if it’s about Chester. She tells him no, but she’s a fucking liar. She tells him not to worry because the next day all the dances are going to be with him, but that’s when he tells her that he can’t go because he was to work. She get’s all pissed off and says, “My own boyfriend can’t make it to the dance.” He points out that she never said if they were together or not. That’s when she get’s mad and says that that’s what he thinks they should do because it’s a childish thing, or something like that. Then she says, “If you can’t commit to a dance, how can you commit to me?” But it’s just her excuse to be able to fuck around.

In the next scene we see Mr Raditch giving a farewell speech. He mentions how much he loves Degrassi but that all good things must come to an end. That’s when he introduces Mrs Hotass as the new temporary principle. While she’s talking, Marco is pissed off at Manny because she broke Spinner’s heart. They can’t continue with their girl talk because Marco is supposed to present Raditch with a going away present. In bad taste it’s a lighter that looks like a gun. Hoo Ha! As everyone’s clapping Manny can’t help looking and smiling at Chester’s goofy looking ass.

At the computer she’s dismayed to see that she’s been paired with Johnny Mathis aka Danny. She then see’s who Chester’s with and it’s Darcy, who we haven’t seen in a couple of episodes already. Of course she cheats and changes the answers so she can be with him.

Finally it’s the dance and Manny is pissed off to see that she’s still paired with Danny. Marco tells her that the computer is supposed to decide not her. As he says that Chester is looking at her. I’m surprised he can see with his 70’s hair. She get’s all pissed and wonders why he would do that to her. He counters with how she could do that to Spinner, especially since he loves and cares about her. He goes on to tell her to stop being afraid of getting hurt like the previous year and just take a chance. Having no shame she goes up to Chester and you can tell that Darcy wants to tell her to fuck off because Chester is all hers! Chester being a piece of shit goes off to dance with Manny while Darcy get’s boned here.

Paige finally arrives and she asks who she was paired with. The student teacher, I don’t remember his name asks her who the lucky guy is and she says that it’s him. He get’s super uncomfortable and leaves with Paige following

Manny’s just standing there and that’s when Spinner comes along and holds her from behind. Manny get’s a huge smile on her face thinking that it’s Chester, but oh shit. It’s Spinner and the look on her face says it all. He tells her that she’s more important than his shitty job at the Dot. That’s when he opens up to her and tells her that he wants her to be his girlfriend because she’s fun, she makes him happy and she can suck a dick like no other. That’s when she continues to make excuses by saying that he’s on the rebound and why bother trying because they never work out. Chester with his perfect timing comes along with a drink for her. Surprisingly Spinner isn’t a dummy and figures out Manny’s game and tells Chester that Manny doesn’t know what she wants.

As the dance is going on Manny is still going on about the stupid song we heard at the beginning and Chester says that it sounds too Britney like, but that it’s ok. Manny then starts dancing, badly and Chester is so embarrassed by her he tells her that he has to go.

Oh lord, we come upon more drama with Paige and Mr O. He asks her why she’s acting the way she is. That right there tells me that he likes it because he would have just ignored her the rest of the night if he wasn’t interested. Paige asks him to stop acting like a jealous boyfriend and he either likes her or he doesn’t. That’s when he can’t take it anymore and he moves in to kiss her. Man this is all sorts of fucked up here. It’s funny how Manny ruins everything by spotting them. He just runs away like the pedophile that he is.

Out in the hallway Chester says that he’s sorry for just leaving, but out on the dance floor, her goofy dancing was just too embarrassing to stand. He goes in for a kiss and Manny tells him sorry because she already has a boyfriend. Chester get’s his heart broken and lamely says, “Welcome to Degrassi.”

Outside the school Mr O and Paige talk some more about their feelings and that’s when he goes for a kiss and actually does it. This guy has some real balls kissing her in front of the school where everyone can see them. He tells her that they need to be careful and they can’t be caught anymore. He’s definitely thinking with his dick because there is no way that a teenage girl like Paige or Marco can keep their mouth’s shut about something like that.

The episode ends with Manny telling Spinner how Craig treated her like shit and the whole thing hurt. She just doesn’t want to feel that way again and she makes him promise to never break her heart. Spinner promises not to break her little harlot’s heart, but who are we kidding here? Spinner is one of the biggest dickheads on the show. It’s inevitable if you ask me.

So I didn’t care too much about this episode. Way too much relationship drama. Yes, I do realize that this is what Degrassi is all about. But I could careless about Spinner and Manny’s problems. Probably because Manny is a little ho and Spinner is a dick so everyone knows that their relationship is doomed. Speaking of doomed, so is Paige’s romance. I love how the guy knows that she’s jail bait, but he doesn’t care because he just wants to get some teenage poon.

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Season 4, Episode 12, “Voices Carry, Part 2”

We continue Craig’s decent into madness with the conclusion of a not so great two part episode. Yeah that’s right, I said it. It fucking sucks!

Pre-Credit Opener: So it seems like Craig’s crazy ass has finally calmed down and he’s just sitting in his wreaked motel room spinning around his dead mom’s wedding ring on a table when the phone rings. Of course it’s Ashley and she says that she was trying to call him all night but he wasn’t picking up. Yeah, that’s because he had completely blacked out and was doing an all night rampage in his room. They have some small talk and that’s when stupid Ashley says that she doesn’t want to marry him now. She does want to marry him in the future though. Craig being depressed one second is now elated that she said that and his mood is now one of pure joy. What an asshole.

At the Dot Craig once again is looking hyper as hell when Marco walks in and Craig starts to say that he acted like an idiot. Marco knows all this already and wants to know what’s the matter with him. Craig tells him about Ashley and going to her gay dad’s wedding. I love how he called Marco because he wants help with shopping for a new expensive suit. Marco should be pissed off that he called him for that exact reason, but I think he loves shopping so much, he doesn’t give a shit.

Seems like Craig is going shopping using Joey’s gold credit card, I have no idea how Joey can even afford to have a credit card since he never ever has any money. Or perhaps, that’s why he’s in such deep shit all the time. During this whole montage Craig is picking out clothes that would make him look like a fucking clown. So good thing that Marco is there to shoot down all his horrible choices. After all that it’s obvious that he ran up a huge bill, but it looks like he just got the same suit that he wore in the previous episode.

Oh god!! I forgot about Liberty and Jt’s stupid ass subplot about the Degrassi school musical. They tell everyone about the Raditch song and they love it, but Manny and the rest of the drama club don’t want to sing it because they know that they’ll get into deep shit.

At the hotel elevator Craig is boring some poor east Indian guy to death with Ashley and her dad’s wedding. You can tell the guy just wants the doors to open so that he can get away from this yapping crazy fuck he’s stuck with. Mercifully the doors open and Craig get’s out, but that’s when he see’s the hotel security and staff looking at his destroyed room. Craig quickly get’s back in to hide from them.

Poor Jimmy is sort of enjoying his horrible hospital food when Craig bursts through the damn door and demands to use his bathroom so that he can change into his suit. He starts to change and Jimmy looks away because he doesn’t want to look at his wang. Craig meanwhile is telling him all about Ashley and him getting married. Jimmy tells him that he has time for that, and that’s when he says that Ashley said yes. Which is not the truth by far. Jimmy points out that he’s sixteen and maybe he should wait until he graduates and get’s a job. All Craig does is completely ignore him and asks him for help with his cuff link. Jimmy now seeing how deranged he’s acting asks him if he’s drunk or high as fuck. Craig just shouts, “I LOVE HER!” Jimmy should have told him, “I don’t have time for this Mickey Mouse bullshit, get out of my room.”

Finally it’s time for gay wedding and everyone there is as happy as can be. Craig meanwhile is there and he’s twitching away like a motherfucker. Ashley meanwhile doesn’t seem to notice it and mouths I love you to him.

Back at Joey’s house, Joey has finally noticed that his credit card is missing and he asks Caitlin if she can pay for the Chinese food. Something tells me that he asks her for help paying for shit alot. Spike and Snake are there helping and she pays for the food because she fees bad for him. Joey mentions that he thinks that Craig probably stole it. Snake makes a face and asks him how he’s been doing lately. Snake tells him that he’s a bit concerned about him because he’s acting a bit unstable. Joey not wanting to believe that Craig has something wrong with him just blows him off. But uh oh, the hotel has now called his house and they tell him about how Craig fucked up the hotel room and he’s now stuck with a huge bill. I guess he believes him now.

At the wedding Ashley’s mom is giving a toast to the two newlyweds. She mentions that their family might be unusual, but that they’re awesome or something. At that she asks Ashley to stand up and she does so slightly embarrassed. As she sits down Craig’s crazy ass stands up and she tries to get him to sit down, but he says he has something to say. And yeah, he tells everyone that he and Ashley are getting married and she’s beyond mortified. Her mom is pissed and everyone else just feels awkward as hell.

In the next scene Ashley is asking him what he was thinking by doing that shit. Craig starts to ramble on about how she told him that she would want to get married to him eventually and he didn’t see anything wrong with him telling everyone, so he’s blameless. Ashley then tells him that she’s changed her mind and she wants him to leave. Craig of course acts like a lunatic and get’s on his knees, declaring his love for her. Having enough, she tells him to go home. Craig says he will, but first he needs to cause a scene. He goes up to Ashley’s mom and two dad’s and tells them that he needs to talk to them. All he does is start to ramble again and that’s when Ashley’s dad’s husband starts to drag his ass out and they get into a tussle. Craig falls onto a table and he goes through it like Chris Farley used to.

Way to grind the episode to a fucking halt Degrassi writers. It’s time for Liberty and JT’s song and of course they piss Mr Raditch off. That’s exactly what they do and he gives them both detention. This is so stupid and not necessary I’m not even going into detail with it because there was more.

Craig meanwhile has really gone into the deep end and is crying like crazy saying that he needs Ashley. Seriously, he looks so demented he’s making me laugh. Since he’s totally wacked out of his mind he decides to pick a fight with the phone booth and he loses that one as well.

He finally makes his way to Joey’s house where Caitlin tells him that Joey’s not there because he’s out looking for him. She see’s that his hand is bleeding and she’s going to go and get something for it. Angela tells him that Joey’s super pissed, Craig not caring tells her that she needs to give Ashley his dead mom’s wedding ring and he goes up to his room.

Back at the wedding Joey comes by looking for Craig and pretty much starts accusing Craig and Ashley of stealing his credit card and booking a hotel room with it. Ashley get’s embarrassed because her mom hears all this and she’s just sickened because she knows that Craig’s nasty ass just banged her daughter. Joey then asks her why they had to trash it for and it’s going to cost him $4,000 dollars in damages. Ashley surprised says that she didn’t and quickly figures out that Craig did he because he had a huge meltdown the previous night when she turned down his marriage proposal. Ashley’s mom now pissed off tells Joey that Craig has a lot of problems and that’s when Ashley defends him because she’s stupid. Joey meanwhile is in despair wondering what’s going on with Craig.

At Joey’s Craig comes down the stairs and tells Caitlin that she should give Joey an envelope. Caitlin mentions that they know that he stole the credit card. He get’s all pissed off and says that it’s about $3,000 dollars and the credit card is there too. She asks him where he’s going and he says back to the wedding. But shit, Joey’s home and he’s fuming. Craig tries to leave and Joey tells him that he’s not going anywhere because something isn’t right with him. Craig once again acts like a maniac and Joey has to push him back so he can sit down. Craig hulks out in anger and pushes Joey around like a rag doll and then proceeds to kick the shit out of Joey’s ass. Goddamn Joey, even a teenage kid can beat your ass. This is like the third or fourth fight he’s lost since the original series. Ashley walks in and puts a stop to Craig’s rage. Immediately he calms down, shit that’s just like the Black Widow and the Hulk right here. Ashley tells him that he needs help and that’s when he seems to notice that Joey’s been beaten to a pulp. Joey you truly are a bald loser! Pathetic I swear!

At detention JT and Liberty are there and they have a kiss that’s so nauseating. Where did that come from? JT only hated her since the show debuted. He must have zero standards. That or I guess he figured that all he has is Toby, Johnny Mathis, and his hand. So I guess Liberty wins. But apparently they’re a couple now.

At the hospital Craig is telling Ashley that he still can’t sleep and that he’s crazy. Ashley says that he’s not crazy, he’s bi polar. So that explains all the erratic behavior. Craig tells Ashley that maybe she should go, and goes on to say that he’ll be dealing with the condition for the rest of his life. The episode ends with Ashley saying that she’s not leaving and that they’re still a couple.

So ok, this episode was a bit better than the previous one. I still find it hilarious that Joey got his ass kicked by his teenage stepson. So Craig’s bi polar, he’s still an chode though. As for Liberty and JT, who cares. Who would have thought that there’d be a worse couple than Craig and Ashley. You really out did yourself in this one Degrassi.

 

Season 4, Episode 11, “Voices Carry, Part 1”

So the Craig and Ashley saga continues. Again, I have to say, who cares and I hate it that this one is a two parter. The writers just seem to enjoy torturing everyone with their bullshit romance.

Pre-Credit Opener: We see Craig and Ashley smooching in front of the school. After some dumb small talk it seems like Ashley doesn’t want her mom to see that she’s with Craig. I guess she hates his guts because he broke her daughters heart when he was banging Manny like a jack rabbit. She goes on to say that she’s been very busy with her dad’s upcoming wedding. Uh oh, Ashley’s mom pulls up and it’s clear that she wants to cut his balls off. Craig tells Ashley that he’ll call her later that night, but her mom tells him not to bother.

In the hallway Ashley is rehearsing what she’s going to tell her mom that Craig is back in the picture. Craig meanwhile is just focusing on the fact that her mom told him to not bother calling her. Craig is a classic narcissistic person. Suddenly we hear an according playing and it’s obvious that it’s Marco, but shit, now he’s singing Craig’s shitty song pretty badly. Turns out that they’re listening to a CD of their recording and Spinner tells him that that’s the finished product because he abandoned them for Yoko, I mean Ashley. He then pours out all the CD’s onto Craig’s feet and Marco tells him that it’s the one and only single that their band will ever put out. So it’s obvious that they’re still pissed. But Ashley tells Craig that she can careless because she’s back with him and that’s all that counts. That just goes to show how selfish she is too.

Oh great, so the subplot involves Liberty and the fact that she wrote a play. I already wish this episode was over with. She goes on to say that she doesn’t want to deal with it, but Manny tries to encourage her. No one should ever encourage Liberty. They go on to say that she adapted Dracula from the actual novel. She tries to sound all sophisticated with how she’s talking, but all it does is annoy the shit out of me. JT goes on to say that she’s brilliant and then mentions that he’s the director. Why would anyone let an immature dickhead like JT direct a play is beyond me.

In the MI lab Craig and Ashley are IMing each other and that’s when Craig shows her the lyrics to a new shitty song. Snake tells them to go back to work, but Craig is starting to act like a fucking maniac and is completely ignoring Snake. It’s easy to ignore Snake because who takes him seriously as an authority figure. After the third time of ignoring him, Snake tells him to take the computer in the corner. Craig starts to have a meltdown over being reprimanded and Ashley seems to be embarrassed for him, or maybe herself? It could be her. Anyways, Craig tells Snake to go fuck himself and storms out the door. Snake now completely defeated tells him to go to the office, but it’s obvious that he’s not. I know I wouldn’t listen to him.

Out in the hall way Ashley is asking him if he’s calmed down and he starts to go on about everyone trying to separate them. She tells him to chill the fuck out since they were talking in class. Ok, Craig is clearly insane, he get’s short with her and asks her who’s side is she on and then demands that she convince her mom that he’s not an asshole even though he is. She suggests that maybe they should tell her parents until after the wedding. Craig acting like a little bitch says that she doesn’t want him there.

In the next scene it seems like Manny is playing Mina while Alex I don’t know which character she is, but she’s in the drama club too. Who would have thought. Manny probably wants to make it like Bram Stoker’s Dracula and show her tits to the crowd. Mr Raditch meanwhile has called Liberty and JT aside and he has a big problem with the play because it has severed heads, stakes through the heart. You know, classic Vampire stuff. He’s overreacting because of what Rick did, she counters that by saying that she wrote the play to give everyone hope. Raditch sounding like a dictator wants them to have a musical about Degrassi and how awesome it is to go there. Even though a lot of tragedy has been associated with it since the original show.

In the hospital we see Jimmy listening to one of his mixtapes while he’s trying to do some exercises in bed. Craig then barges in wanting help on what to do with Ashley. Jimmy suddenly throws the bar away in frustration and Craig is barely realizing that all he does is complain about himself and his stupid bullshit problems. Jimmy meanwhile can’t even fucking walk anymore so he has bigger fish to fry. But it seems like he prefers that Craig talk about himself because everyone else tries to act like everything is ok. Jimmy suggests that he get her alone to talk to her. He says that he can’t because she’s busy with her dad’s stupid wedding while Caitlin is having their place painted. He then get’s the brilliant idea of booking a hotel room.

Going on with that insanity, he goes over to Joey’s and asks him for money. What a surprise, Joey says that he’s broke. Craig, Joey never has money because he’s a broke dick loser. Craig tells him that he has the money to pay him back, he just needs his credit card for one night only. Joey then mentions that the school called about him skipping out, but he just blows it off. Joey being fair, but firm tells him that he’s not lending him his card. So what does Craig do? Yup, he steals it.

At the wedding site Craig meets Ashley’s new aunt, some bimbo looking chick with a baby girl voice. She then starts to flirt with him, but he tells her that he already hurt Ashley once and no matter what, he won’t do it again. Ashley meanwhile is behind him listening and she’s elated to hear that. He quickly tells her that he got a room for the night and that she can go there after the wedding. Ashley’s mom then comes along and tells her that she made it clear that there’s no more room for other people. Especially greasy haired cheaters like Craig.

Afterwards he takes her to the motel room and Craig is one cheesy motherfucker. He has rose pedals on the floor in the shape of a heart with their initials in it. Ashley’s emo heart is beyond happy and she tells him that it’s perfect. She notices that he got a room with two beds but if he wants they can totally fuck and just share one bed. She says this while spreading her legs open. Woah Ashley! I never thought you had it in you! But the catch being that he wears a rubber. He goes into the drawer and takes out a whole package full of them. Glad to see he learned his lesson after he porked Manny and got her pregnant.

Good lord it seems like they boned their brains out because there’s clothes all over the place. Ashley meanwhile is getting dressed and crying uncontrollably. Craig instantly panics and apologizes if he did something wrong. Just like Caitlin in School’s Out, Ashley is crying tears of joy because she let Craig’s nasty ass break her little kitty in. She tells him to keep talking because he’s just been rambling this whole time and he fucks things up by saying that they should just take off and get an apartment together. Ashley tells him that she has to go because of her dad’s rehearsal dinner and he starts to act possessive. Ashley being stupid doesn’t seem to notice because she’s so “happy”. She then makes the mistake of saying that he’s as important to her as her dad and tells him to get dressed because he’s coming with her.

The episode once again comes to a screeching halt with Liberty’s boring subplot. Manny comes along to the Dot and that’s where Liberty and JT tell her that they’re now working on Degrassi the musical. Manny is beyond mortified at the thought and JT says that he quits and leaves in a huff. Manny pretty much tells her to go and seduce JT at her dad’s hot tub.

So it seems like the rehearsal dinner is at a gay bar. What the fuck? Those wacky Canadians again. Nah, I won’t say that because it’s not right. That’s Degrassi for you. Ashley walks in with Craig and it seems like his mom is ready to murder him, but all she says is that she needs a moment alone with Ashley. Ashley being stupid says that if she has something to say, she can say it in front of Craig. Craig out of his mind tells her that it’s ok and they should go have a talk. They start to talk and Ashley points out that not only did her dad leave her, he left her for another man and now she’s throwing him a goddamn wedding. So if she can forgive him, then she can forgive Craig.

Later on it seems like Toby is dancing with Ashley’s mom because not even a gay dude would want to dance with a toad like him. He see’s Ashley’s aunt Sally passing by and tries to talk to her, but she ignores him like everyone else does. Craig all of a sudden tells her that he has to leave for a bit, but that he’s coming back. Back at Joey’s he’s singing his stupid song he wrote about her and is digging out a packet out of an old shoe box.

He comes down in a suit and that’s when Joey asks him if everything is ok because he seems hyper as fuck. He tells them that he and Ashley are back together and he must have been out of his mind that he cheated on her with Manny. I love how he doesn’t remember that it was because Ashley wasn’t putting out and Manny spread those legs faster than could be believed.

Back at the gay bar Ashley notices that he’s come back in a suit and is wondering what’s up. He takes her aside and the crazy motherfucker is actually asking her to marry him. Ashley being freaked out tells him no. Craig immediately starts to lose his shit and starts to act like a maniac again. Ashley just stares at him and he leaves in a huff.

Oh lord we cut to Liberty and JT at her hot tub for some reason. They talk about more stupid ideas for the musical and one of the songs is sticking it to Mr Raditch.

Once again we go back to the gay bar and Ashley’s whorish looking new aunt wants to know what happened with Craig. She tells her that she doesn’t know if they’re still together but he asked her to marry him. The aunt is all surprised and wants to know what Ashley said, man, she’s nosy Ashley tells her that she said no and the aunt says, “But I thought you loved him?” Yeah, clearly she should not take any advice from this chick if she thinks Ashley getting married at such a young age is to be even considered.

The episode ends with Craig having the mother of all meltdowns. The room is a complete wreck, everything is broken including the TV. Joey is so fucked here, it’s even funnier because he probably can’t even pay for it. He’ll probably have to get Caitlin to foot the bill.

So I have to say, this episode was pretty meh for me. The meltdown was awesome, but shit, I can careless about Craig and Ashley’s relationship. I know they have their fans, I have no idea why, but they do. Don’t get me started on Liberty and her stupid play. I was hoping that she was being phased out of the show because we’ve hardly seen her this season, but there she is, boring everyone to death with her bland and lameness.

Season 4, Episode 10, “Neutron Dance”

And we’re back for another episode review of Degrassi. This one deals with Craig and Ashley’s relationship again. I don’t know about you guys, but I could careless because Ashley is still a boring character and so is their relationship.

Pre-Credit Opener: Seems like Craig and the boys are still playing Reggae for some inexplicable reason. I could tell you now, that shit sucks ok. I guess it’s not just the boys, Ashley seems to have joined the band and it’s obvious that the guys don’t want her there. That’s probably why they’re playing Reggae to begin with.

In the MI lab Paige is going off to Snake because some asshole left gum on her chair. Snake being a little annoyed tells her to just find another chair and to stop her yapping. Hazel tells Paige that she should join yoga after school because it’s really helped her deal with Jimmy getting blasted and being turned into a cripple. Paige turns her down at first, but since the new student teacher Mr Olyeander is going to be there, she will too. I guess she didn’t learn her lesson from messing around with older guys.

We cut to the hospital where Craig is complaining to Jimmy about the fact that he thought that Spinner was going to walk out of their band practice. Jimmy should have told him, “I’m crippled you fool!” But all he says is that Spinner walks out on a lot of things. Craig and his greasy 70’s hair then says that Ashley has been there at practice and Jimmy get’s wise to them. Craig denies that there’s anything going on, but Jimmy doesn’t buy it one bit.

Oh lord so the student teacher is teaching the yoga class and both Marco and Paige are staring at his ass. Marco whispers to her, “Check out his hot bulge too.” He comes along and helps Paige with her technique and she practically has an orgasm right then and there. After that Paige tells Hazel that he was flirting with her, Hazel thinks that she’s insane and that he’s just the teacher.

Back in Craig’s garage the band is still arguing over the direction their band should go. Craig is singing some lyrics and even Marco thinks that they’re fucking gay. He mentions that he thought that it was a rock band and the lyrics sound soft. Craig being an “artist” says that they need to change and not stay the same. Spinner decides to come by and brings his skank Manny along too. You can tell that both Craig and Ashley are annoyed that she’s there. Hey she was the reason that they broke up because she got pregnant with Craig’s love child. Craig asks Spinner what Manny is doing there and being a dickhead he says that if Ashley is there, so could Manny.

At the movie theater Paige is bothering Alex about Mr O and if she has a chance of boning him. Just then he comes walking on by and says hello. But wow, he says that she’s his favorite student. Going by that Paige is convinced that the guy wants to pork her and Alex tells her to go for it.

At Degrassi ,Manny is wearing a cowboy hat that all sluts and skanks like to wear. It’s like a part of their official uniform. Spinner and Marco are still annoyed that Ashley is in the band and has any input. So it seems like they’re there for an interview with Liberty and her pirate nerd newspaper. The guys get instantly annoyed because Craig and Ashley are the only ones answering the questions. I guess they think they’re Degrassi’s answer to the White Stripes, except they suck. Big time.

In the next scene Spinner and Marco decide to confront Craig about Ashley and how she’s ruining the band. Craig of course get’s all pissed off and says that they did agree to her being in the band, which is a big lie. Marco then points out that she lost the contest fair and square and why should she take Jimmy’s place now that he’s basically Professor X. Craig full of attitude tries to talk to them, but they both say that if he doesn’t get rid of her, then they’re quitting the band.

So he decides to do just that. But he can’t because she just has to be all sweet about being there while they’re recording their shitty single. Craig decides to just kiss her and she leaves looking pleasantly surprised. She’s all, “I was assaulted, it was fun!”

At the Dot the boys think that he finally got rid of Ashley, but that’s when Craig tells them that he and Ashley are back together again. Even though no such thing has happened. Predictably they leave even more pissed off than before.

We go back to Paige’s stupid subplot and we can tell that she wants his hands all over her body again. He ignores her and she get’s annoyed when he compliments Heather Saint Claire instead of her. After class Hazel is telling her that she’s insane and she needs to stay out of it. Mr Wonderful passes by and Paige over hears that he’s meeting one of his bro’s for drinks at some bar. Paige decides to go, even though she’s underage.

What a surprise, we see Ashley talking to Ellie and she’s just gushing over the fact that Craig kissed her. While all this is going on, Ellie is packing up because Sean left her high and dry, so she’s fucked there. And because of that Ellie is now a man hater and says that guys suck and that they enjoy playing with a woman’s emotions.

At the Dot Craig and Ashley decide to have a talk over what happened and of course she takes Ellie’s shitty advice and she pretty much says that they made a mistake and that at least they still have the band. You can tell that Craig got his heart broken but he’s staying strong.

Outside some bar or club Paige is showing this big Asian guy a fake ID and we don’t get to see if it worked or not. I’m guessing that it did.

We go back to Craig and the band and Spinner is escalating the bullshit by saying since Craig is always changing things, he’s having Manny now joining the band as well and she’s going to be playing the tambourine. Marco makes his little statement by busting out his accordion. Ashley walks in and wants to know why they’re making so many changes because they’re recording their song the next day. Spinner asks Craig why and of course he doesn’t answer so they go on to play some truly shitty music. Not that big of a change really.

So yeah, Paige and Hazel managed to get into the bar and Paige is acting like an idiot saying all loud that she can’t believe that they made it in. Right away she spies Mr O and she actually goes up and talks to him and offers to buy him a drink. Just then his really hot girlfriend comes along and proceeds to humiliate Paige by pointing out that Paige has a giant crush on him. Paige meanwhile wants to ooze down into the floor because she’s so embarrassed. His girlfriend though acts like a real bitch and pretty much tells that bartender that Paige is just a kid and they get kicked out. I gotta say, the girlfriend showed how insecure she really is by doing that shit.

Finally it’s time for the guys to record their single and they’re all still acting ridiculous over Ashley being there. Not that I blame them though. Ashley makes things worse because she just has to open her mouth and asks if they’re really going to record the song that way and then asks Craig, like he’s making him take her side. Everyone leaves and Craig buckles under the pressure and kicks Ashley out of the band. Ashley near tears asks if that’s what the whole band wants and he says yes, except for him.

So they’re recording the song they did last year at the contest and they’re much better with Ashley not being there. As he’s singing the song he realizes that he fucked up again by breaking her heart. He stops singing near the end and he tells the guys that he has to go and be with Ashley because apparently the whole fucking world revolves around her, messing up their recording time.

Craig chases after Ashley telling her that he chooses her over the band and the recording studio. Reasoning that the recording studio will always be there, but it won’t. Yeah, that really was his big chance because Craig sucks as a musician, so does Ashley. Ashley makes the situation confusing because she acts like she doesn’t like Craig in that way and he goes away dejected, but then she smiles and tells him that he’s not going away that easy. She is so annoying with her indecision at times. God, Craig has a huge zit on his face, he needs to pop it or something. I thought Sean was Degrassi’s resident pizza face. Anyways, the episode ends with the both of them smooching and becoming a couple again.

I didn’t care for this episode, because really, the whole Craig and Ashley thing has been played out already. It’s like I said at the beginning of the review, who cares about them. I didn’t like the Paige subplot either, I was all, “Yeah, it bored me.” But I guess that’s it for the Downtown Sasquatch.

Season 4, Episode 9, “Back In Black”

Well we’re back for another review of Degrassi. After last episode’s harrowing turn of events, I had to take a break because emotionally, it was too much for me. Nah, I’m just bullshitting. I was too lazy to write another one up. But here we go again. I believe Shawn leaves in this episode. Shit, is it Shawn or Sean? I’m going with Sean.

Pre-Credit Opener: We open up with Sean proudly looking at different newspapers saying that he’s a hero. I think he’s more surprised that it doesn’t say, Wanted dead or alive on it. Ellie meanwhile can’t help being a hater and says that she can’t believe that they’re still talking about the shooting. Well no shit, of course they still would be. This just leads me to believe that Ellie has a lack of empathy. Raditch is in front of the school talking to the reporters about counselors being at there to offer people help. But please, the only people that need help are the people who were involved. Rick is as dead as Julius Caesar, so that leaves him out. Raditch is then left holding his dick when the hot reporter from the previous episode see’s Sean and pounces on him for an interview. Ellie not liking the attention he’s getting pulls him into the school. Before he can get in, the reporter says that he’s a hero and she wants to know what it feels like. Sean seeing that all sorts of girls are into him because he killed Rick loves what he’s seeing and just says, “I guess I’m about to find out home girl.”

In the next scene the Asian counselor is having some sort of hippy therapy session and Paige is going on about being worried that Jimmy not walk again. He’ll be alright, plus he can compete in the upcoming robot Olympics. Hazel is still a wreck and is crying her eyes out through out this whole thing.

Meanwhile in Snake’s class, Snake is trying to convince everyone not to hate on Rick from beyond the grave. If I was Emma I’d be all, he tried to murder me you giant twatwaffle, of course I’m going to hate him. Toby looking literally like a troll says that Rick was bullied really bad. Craig annoyed tells him not to be making excuses for him being a maniac. Snake goes on to say that they need to talk to an adult before it comes to a crisis point. But sometimes adults give horrible advice too, just look at Caitlin, she’s ruined more relationships than I can count. During all this meanwhile Spinner is feeling guilty as hell, you can tell by all his heavy breathing.

Oh boy, Marco is talking about his feelings while having a Phantom of the Opera like mask on. I have gay friends and even they would say to tone it down. As all this lame shit is being said Sean is rolling his eyes and it’s obvious he thinks it’s a big waste of time. Especially when he says that he needs that stupid shit to be over with already. Being a true Canadian gangsta from the mean street’s of Degrassi he simply says that Rick got dealt with and he doesn’t feel guilt about him dying.

Back in the Mi lab Sean has a talk with Snake and they talk about how he saved Emma’s life. Clearly seeing that he’s uncomfortable talking about such a traumatic experience Snake keeps pushing him to talk about how he really feels. It seems like he’s just about to open up to him, but that’s when Emma walks in crying, fucking up the moment. She says that she can’t take everyone staring at her, as soon as she see’s Sean she gives him a big hug and thanks him for saving her life.

Outside Degrassi Jay is going on about not wanting to be a part of the therapy session. Alex says that he may be a piece of shit with no conscience, but she needs to go because she’s also feeling extremely guilty. Jay only thinking of himself tells her to watch her mouth and not admit to anything. As they’re leaving school the reporter comes along again and tells Sean that she had an interview with his mom. In the news van Sean is watching his mom talking about how Sean is a problem child. I just noticed it’s the lady from the remake of Dawn of the Dead. Anyway’s he get’s pissed off at her show of emotion for him. Emma comes along looking for Sean, Jay tells her that he’s talking to the reporter and that’s when we see Sean hulking out and destroy’s the fucking monitor. In a huff he tells Jay that he’s driving and then orders everyone, including Emma to get into the car. So off they go to Wasaga Beach.

We come upon the B plot of this episode and it involves JT and Toby’s relationship. Or lack there of now. He comes along as they’re playing basketball and JT and Johnny Mathis can’t help being dicks to him because he was friends with Rick.

Finally we go to Wasaga Beach and it’s just popping with all sorts of people who should be in school instead of there. Sean stops the car and surprise, surprise his parents live in a trailer park. Huffing and puffing, he knocks all hard on the door to confront his mom. She tries to hug him, but he pushes her away. He starts to call her out for being such a shitty parent and that she gave an Academy Award winning performance for the cameras. She starts to cry and just says that she’ll let him go.

Now at the beach Jay and Sean are burying Emma and Ellie and that’s when Sean spots his old Nemesis. The dude looks like a guy from my old neighborhood, it’s hilarious. Turns out he’s the kid who Sean deafened by hitting him with all his strength. Sean tells Jay that the kid tried to ambush him and that’s when he fucked him up.

Back at Degrassi Toby is checking out the shrine the students made for Jimmy. Man that must be inconvenient for the people who have the lockers around it. Manny comes along and says that she didn’t know that Jimmy had so many friends. Toby points out that most of the well wishers are strangers. Toby can sure count himself as one of his non friends as well. He goes on to bitch to Manny how JT is being a shithead towards him. Manny feeling sorry for him just puts her hand on his shoulder. Seeing that he has her sympathy, he tells her that Rick’s wake is that night, but he doesn’t want to go alone. Manny should have moon walked backwards after hearing that. She asks him about JT, but all he says is, “What about him?”

At the beach Jay goes up to the deaf kid and asks him how much it costs to rent a jet ski. The kid see’s Sean and you can tell he has nothing but hatred in his eyes for him. Jay being an asshole makes fun of him being deaf and that’s when the kid attacks Sean instead of him. He goes on to say that he literally recognized his eyes brows in the paper and then tells him to sucker punch him in the other ear like he did before. Sean bitches out and starts to leave, and that’s when the kid points out that he doesn’t deafen kids anymore, he kills them. Sean tries to beat his ass, but he’s stopped by everyone there. Surprisingly he gives Sean the keys to a jet ski and tells him it’s on the house. Yeah, that makes no sense. But ok.

Ellie tries to have a heart to heart with Sean, but he doesn’t want to talk about his feelings just yet. She pisses him off because she says that their two stories don’t really mesh. She goes on to say that the deaf kid alluded to the fact that he used to bully Sean and take his lunch money and that Sean made a punk move and sucker punched him. He get’s all pissed off saying that she believes him instead. Then he really loses it and wanting to cry, says that when the gun went off, he thought he had pissed himself silly, but it was just Rick’s life blood draining out of him. Not being able to handle his situation at the moment, he has to take his jet ski out there and just ride the waves! But it looks like he can’t handle the beast that he’s riding because he’s all over the place and then he crashes into the water. He pops up head down and that’s when the deaf kid goes out there and saves him.

We go back to the B plot and Manny has a few words with JT. She tells him that his best friend needs him and that’s when JT says former best friend. Johnny Mathis points out that Toby is a major four eyed geek and no one likes him. Manny now annoyed reminds JT that he’s a fucking nerd too and isn’t any better than Toby. She goes on to call Danny Webster and that if he hadn’t ditched Toby for him, he never would have became friends with Rick. JT tells her that she has the gull to be talking about people ditching people. Manny burns him by saying she remembered why they broke up in the first place because he can never be the bigger man. Ouch, she just had to bring up the fact that he has a needle dick.

Back at the beach Emma and Sean have a little chat. Sean tells her that he’s sorry for everything that happened the previous year and everything he put her through. She forgives him and says, “Ancient history.” She mentions how they should get heading back, but he says they have to go somewhere first.

Ah, so he’s gone back to his parents trailer. I have to point out that they look more like his grandparents. I guess he has old ass parents like Shane did in Degrassi Junior High. Sean you can tell is an emotional wreck at this point. His dad doesn’t help matters by saying how long until the police get there. Sean starts to leave but his mom tells him to ignore his crack. She goes on to say that what she said to the reporter was the truth and that sending him away was the best thing to do. Sean starts to cry and tells them how Rick was going to kill Emma and yeah, we all know what happened at this point. But his real grief is that he thinks that he did indeed kill Rick. His parents comfort him saying that it’s alright and that he’s home.

It’s time for Rick’s wake and it seems like it’s a closed casket. I guess no one wanted to see Degrassi’s newest demon at rest. Toby walks in with Manny who is dressed so inappropriately for a funeral. She’s probably going to twerk on his casket in honor of Rick. It’s awkward as hell when Rick’s mom makes a scene in front of everyone though. Just then, JT walks in and tells his mom how sorry he was about what happened to Rick. She thanks him and asks if he was his friend too. JT ignoring the question just says that it was a goddamn tragedy what happened.

The episode ends with Sean telling Ellie that he’s staying there because that’s what he needs in his life at the moment. Ellie starts to cry because she doesn’t want to lose him and says that she loves him. But shit, where is she going to live now that Sean has basically dumped her and left her alone to fend for herself?

So this was a pretty good episode. Just goes to show you that even the most cynical and toughest of guys have their breaking point emotionally. Too bad that Sean is now out of the show because he always was one of the more interesting characters. Also, I’m glad that Manny put JT in his place by saying that he’s still a loser and he shouldn’t be treating Toby like shit. Even though Toby is a losers loser.

Season 4, Episode 8, “Time Stands Still Part 2”

Previously on Degrassi, Joey is revealed to not only be losing his home, but his business is also failing big time because he’s a broke dick loser. The only good thing is that Caitlin has returned from her triumphant Aids world tour. But seriously who cares about him and his problems. Rick is the star of this two parter and his bullying has now reached a boiling point as Spinner, Jay and Alex dumped a bunch of paint over him and then they feathered him in front of a city wide TV audience. We finished the previous episode with him looking at his father’s hand gun. And now the shocking conclusion to this two parter.

Pre-Credit Opener: This episode finds us with Rick still staring at the 45 in his dad’s study. We cut to the school where Emma and Toby are talking about what happened. He says that they can just edit Rick being humiliated out of the show but Emma doesn’t think they can. JT meanwhile is laughing his ass off over the incident because everyone there hates Rick. Toby being a little toad just says that he wouldn’t think it was so funny if it had happened to him. Johnny Mathis being an asshole said he would laugh still. He then spots Rick and he’s come back to school still in his dad’s suit covered in paint and feathers. But he’s walking around like a zombie holding his back pack tight to his chest. You know he has it bad when even the extras hanging out in front of the school are making fun of him. Toby says that someone should talk to him, but Emma doesn’t want anything to do with him because she told him in the previous episode that she just pitied him and isn’t remotely interested in him romantically. Toby tries to talk to him saying that Raditch is beyond pissed off and that he’s going to punish who did it. Rick full of despair just says that they’ll only get a detention. Toby tells him that people will understand if he takes the rest of the day off, but Rick all ominous simply says that that’s one day that he actually wants to be there at school. The statement is accentuated by the tension in the music.

In the next scene we see Raditch berating the entire school over what just happened. In class Alex and Jay are trying their hardest not to bust out laughing. In Mrs Kwan’s class JT is still making fun of Toby’s loser friend Rick and says that he hopes that he’s finally gotten the hint and leaves the school. Man, it’s so obvious that JT is much cooler than Toby when he says that he’ll have to find a new gamer geek friend to look at porn together.

At the basketball court Spinner is laughing at how they got Rick back because he has a total lack of empathy. Jimmy sounding annoyed tells him to cut the guy some slack because he’s actually alright. But Spinner is still having delight over how Rick was embarrassed in front of the entire school. Jimmy asks what kind of person does that kind of shit and Spinner being an idiot admits that it was him and then starts to threaten Jimmy, but he can’t finish his thought because Jimmy get’s into his face and asks him what he’s going to do about it. Spinner intimidated starts to back away and Jimmy tells him to save the bully crap for someone who won’t fight back. To accentuate his point he shoves the ball into Spinner’s gut, taking the wind out of it. Spinner then hits him with the ball right in the face and that’s when Jimmy man handles him and shoves him against the fence. The fight is short lived because Coach Armstrong comes along and breaks it up. I swear, this show always has a fight that lasts about five seconds or less.

Oh God, we go back to Joey’s and Caitlin is asking him why he’s selling his house. Joey tells her, “I’m broke bitch!” He goes on to explain that it’s either his house or the dealership that goes, but that makes zero sense because the dealership is also folding because he just sells cheap used cars to clueless foreigners.

Mercifully we go back to Degrassi where everyone in the cafeteria is dying from laughter at the sight of Rick just standing there looking like a lunatic. Paige comes up to him and surprises everyone by actually not being her usual cunty self and tells him that she’s sorry about what happened to him and the people who did it suck ass. Her being decent seems to have saved her life because it’s obvious that Rick was there to fucking kill her, but he seems to have had a change of heart and tells her that he’s sorry for what he did to Terri. Finally he goes to his locker and puts the backpack in there and his father’s paint covered coat.

Next we have an awkward scene between Caitlin and Sidney. Caitlin tells her that she just got back that morning and she saw Joey’s house for sale with her name on the sign. Sidney tells her to cool her tits and she’s just doing it as a favor to Joey. Caitlin then asks her how much she wants for the joint and Sidney says, about $400,000. Caitlin knowing that the place isn’t worth that much offers $350.000. That or she’s just a bitch and wants to stick it to Sidney. Sidney tells her no way and Caitlin being cheap offers $375.000. Sidney’s all, “You’ve got yourself a goddamn deal!” and they shake on it.

Rick is in the rest room where he’s washed all that shit off of his face, you can tell that he’s still dealing with trying to get over that humiliating experience. But he can’t dwell on it because he hears some people coming and he goes and hides in the stall. Turns out it’s Spinner and Jay talking about whether Raditch knows or not. Right away Jay see’s that Rick is in there due to all the paint and feathers all over the floor. Knowing that he’s in there Jay starts to say that Jimmy was involved and set everything up perfectly. Spinner then says that it was great how he got him to be in the final round for his plan to work out. They walk out with Jay saying it was great having a man on the inside. Rick comes out of the stall fuming because to him Jimmy did the ultimate betrayal.

So oh shit. The tension filled music is back and so is his backpack against his chest. Rick walks up to Jimmy at his locker where Jimmy asks him how he is. He goes on to say how sorry he is about everything and that if Spinner and Jay give him more grief, he’s got his back. Rick not able to control his anger anymore says, “Like you stabbed me in the back.” Jimmy doesn’t know what he’s talking about and says, “Say what?” As he’s saying that he defended him, Rick pulls out his dad’s piece and points it at his chest saying that he only pretended to be his friend. Jimmy starts to back up a bit and it’s obvious that Rick is about to dispense his own brand of justice because he says like a psycho, “You made me do this.” Jimmy starts to run away but he doesn’t get far. Rick somehow managed to hit him in his back even though he had his eyes closed the whole time.

Degrassi trying to be dramatic as hell has cut all sound as everyone around there runs for their motherfucking lives. Craig rounds the corner and finds Jimmy’s limp body just lying there. It sounds like Craig wants to cry, whispering Jimmy’s name in disbelief

In another hallway kids are still running away from Rick’s deranged ass. Sean, Emma and Toby though act like people who have no logic and go to investigate what that loud bang was instead of running in the opposite direction like everyone else. They go around the corner and there’s Rick still holding on to his dad’s 45. It’s pretty damn clear that he’s now gone completely insane and he tells Emma that he’s sorry that he kissed her. Sean stating the obvious says that he has a gun and they should go. Rick in a rage yells at them to not turn away from him. That sure stopped them in their tracks. He continues to talk like a fucking nutcase and says that he’s glad that he found Emma because she made his list. Toby tries to talk to him but Rick just ignores him like everyone else. He starts to go off about his delusions again saying that Emma was shamelessly flirting with him and that he thought that she liked him. Sean now trying to reason with him tells him to put the gun down and that he knows what it’s like to be in his position since he hit a kid so goddamn hard he made him go deaf. He goes on to say that it can be so much worse, and pleads with him again to put the gun down. It looks like he’s getting through to him, but Rick has now gone to eleven and says that it’s too late because he already shot someone. As he says that he points the gun at Emma who’s now crying from fear. She doesn’t become his next victim though because Sean grabs the gun and they have a fight for it. All of a sudden the gun goes off and both Rick and Sean make shocked faces and fall to the ground.

In the next scene all of the cops are there at Degrassi sealing the school off from the outside world. Ashley’s mom comes running up to a Mountie and tells him that she got a call from them about Toby. For some reason they let her in and as she’s about to go up the steps she see’s Jimmy being wheeled out on a stretcher.

I love how the writers of the show are tormenting us by going back to Joey in the next scene. I remembered when this episode first aired I said to myself, who gives a shit about Joey’s B plot. He comes up to her and he’s all happy that he got a buyer for the house. But he’s just pretending, he knows that it was Caitlin that bought the house and he’s all pissed off because she just made him feel like an even bigger bald loser. He should be grateful that he has a woman that would do that for him. Thankfully they get a call about the shooting at Degrassi and off they go.

Back at Degrassi it seems like the Mounties have deployed their anti terrorist task force. We see all sorts of cops in body armor and sub machine guns. Right away we see that Sean is fine except for a minor wound on his arm. Hey look who it is! It’s Sam, Busy’s dad from Ready or Not as the lead detective. He starts to ask Toby why his friend would do such a thing and if he was teased. Toby all full of tears tells him that Rick was tormented everyday. Detective Sam then asks him if he noticed any warning signs about his friend. Acting like a little bitch he starts to cry and says that Rick wasn’t his friend and he was a psycho. Sean just seems to be in shock answering the other detective’s questions. That’s a real man there!

In what I’m guessing is the MI lab Snake is telling Emma that Rick needed help. Yeah, thank you captain fucking obvious. Emma traumatized tells Spike that he pointed the gun right at her. Raditch comes in and asks Snake if he can get into Rick’s emails, as they’re trying to look for any warning signs. Snake not being remotely professional starts to point fingers and blames Raditch for not listening to Rick and not getting him any help. Raditch tells him to shove it up his giant self righteous ass because it’s hard to be a principle to about 700 students and staff there. Snake then starts to go off on Raditch some more and that’s where Spike tells Snake to shut the fuck up already because he’s upsetting Emma and we all know that Snake does whatever Spike says because he’s pussy whipped. You know, Snake truly is a perfect asshole. He’s projecting his own guilt onto Raditch because if it wasn’t for him putting Jimmy on the same team as Rick for the quiz show, none of that would have happened.

Outside the school Caitlin and Joey can’t get in due to it being locked down still. Caitlin trying to act like a big shot says that she’s from the local TV station and the Mountie says that there was some gun shots fired inside, but that’s all he’s willing to say. Joey tries to get in because Craig is in there, but he’s easily pushed back by the cop on duty.

Inside one of the class rooms Paige is going crazy not knowing what’s going on. They start to go over theories and that’s when Paige tells them that she got a text from her mom about a shooting there. Hazel get’s immediately concerned because she see’s that Jimmy isn’t in class. We hear a knock and that’s when the Asian counselor comes in looking for Hazel. Out in the hall she tells her that Jimmy was shot and he’s being taken to the hospital. Hazel starts to cry saying that she needs to go, but she can’t because of the lock down. This scene didn’t seem realistic to me. Would a counselor really go to a girlfriend or boyfriend to tell them what happened? I mean, would that be a priority, I don’t think so. The only people that would be notified would have been his parents.

Finally the lock down is over and Raditch on the PA is telling everyone that they are to go straight home and not to talk to any reporters. But you know that sure as hell isn’t going to happen. They’re all going to stay and gawk. I know I would. Jay and Alex come out and he tells her to relax because she’s saying that she knew she shouldn’t have done what she did. You can tell that she feels guilty as hell over what happened. They run into Spinner and Jay thought that it was him who was blasted by Rick. Spinner in shock tells them that it was Jimmy. In his guilt and fear he says that he has to tell them what they did, but Jay being a scumbag tells him no because they’d all get into real deep shit. Spinner says that he’s his best friend. Jay having no tact says, ” Either outcome, I would say he was your best friend.” Ouch! But it’s true.

Craig comes out and tells Joey and Caitlin that it was Jimmy who was shot. Just then a pushy reporter comes along asking Craig if he knew the victim. He get’s offended by her wording and says that he has a name. Caitlin get’s all pissed off and pushes her away. Again sounding full of herself she says to her, “Here’s your headline, local insensitive reporter, pummeled by famous colleague.” Please she’s just famous around town and that’s the extent of it.

The same reporter starts to ask Toby about what happened and asks if he tried to stop him. Toby has another spaz attack and asks full of tears what he was supposed to do. If she knew the story she would have said that he could have acted like a man instead of cowering behind his human shield Emma. But lets face it, Toby is useless in any situation and wouldn’t have been much help anyways. It’s here where it’s revealed by the reporter that Rick died, Toby all meekly says, “He died?” The report later on that day probably identified Toby as Degrassi’s top dweeb who knew the gunman. It should have been you who died Toby, it should have been you.

At the hospital Paige is comforting Hazel as Jimmy is in the ICU. Spinner comes by but Paige shakes her head at him pretty much saying no. Spinner just leaves crying because he knows what he did.

Seems like everyone is at Spike’s house watching the news. Spike starts to go on about how no one is supposed to be shot at Degrassi. Emma get’s annoyed with her and says that she talks about the school like it’s some sort of sacred place. I’m seriously surprised that Snake isn’t all traumatized again because when Claude killed himself in Degrassi High, it was him who found his headless, festering corpse and it fucked him up royally. He goes on to say that no one there took Rick’s bullying seriously. Ashley starts to go off on Rick, totally assassinating his character and for about the third time Toby acts like a giant pussy and leaves crying. Ashley goes on to say that she wants answers and wants to know what Rick was if he wasn’t a monster. Emma simply says that he was Toby’s friend. I love how she conveniently doesn’t mention that he was her friend too.

We then get a montage of various mourners of this episode’s events. People at the school are already starting a shrine dedicated to Jimmy. I bet you anything that half the people there crying over him didn’t even know his ass. That happens all the time unfortunately. I seriously laughed at the picture they used of Jimmy that says, Why?? At the hospital Paige is telling someone that there hasn’t been a change with Jimmy while Hazel is crying her eyes out watching over him. Spinner meanwhile is also crying because he’s a life ruining asshole and the guilt is eating away at him. The episode ends with Toby and Emma crying over what happened.

So got damn! This was a pretty good episode. I would say that it’s the best in the series so far. Pretty authentic except for the whole Hazel being told about Jimmy part. The only minus of course is the whole Joey subplot, but they wrapped up that unimportant bullshit fast. I have to say, I think at this point we all know that Jimmy ends up being paralyzed from being shot. But as I was watching this it was clear that he was hit more to the side of his back. Now either the bullet ricocheted off his ribs or he has that spinal disease where he has a curved one. Either way, I call bullshit, but ok, he’s now paralyzed for life because of it. All that being said, I think Degrassi was trying to spread the message that people can do awful things but they can still turn their lives around and actually change. But this episode threw that shit right out the window with Rick shooting Jimmy and attempting to Murder Emma as well. Sorry if this one was a bit wordy guys, I guess I had a lot of thoughts on it.

 

Season 4, Episode 7, “Times Stands Still Part 1”

It’s here everyone it’s here. The what’s going down two part episode of Degrassi. Joey is having more mortgage problems and he’s about to lose his house, but seriously, who gives two fucks about that. This is the two part episode where Rick goes right over the edge of the cliff and changes things at Degrassi forever. Well at least until Drake leaves the show.

Pre-Credit Opener: Rick is as happy as can be until Jimmy and Spinner pull up to fuck with him some more. Good God almighty! Spinner has gotten a new haircut and he now looks like a gay douchebag. Jimmy takes his stupid beret off and throws it into the dumpster. They say they’ll help him to look for it, but they just throw his ass in there instead. Rick meanwhile is breathing real hard because he’s angry as hell and it’s only going to get worse from here.

I’m guessing it’s either later on in the day or the next, but Rick spots Spinner’s car and decides to spray paint a giant X on it in retaliation for being picked on. In the hallway he runs into Jimmy and some harsh words are said. Right as Jimmy is about to hit him Snake comes along and asks him some sports questions, probably because he’s black and just assumes that he knows all about sports. His assumption is correct and he tells Rick that Jimmy is his newest team member for the quiz show because Heather St Claire had to pull out due to having a herpes outbreak. Let’s just say Rick isn’t happy to have one of his tormentors on his team.

We cut to Joey and his realtor who looks like Lulu Hogg from The Dukes of Hazard is telling him that he has to clean up his pigsty of a place because he’ll be having an open house. Craig comes down the stairs scratching his balls and Joey asks him what he’s doing there still. He says that he feels sick so there he is. Joey leaves him and the realtor because he has to go back to his failing dealership.

In the hallway Emma comes up to Rick and Toby and says that she made some flashcards for the quiz show. Rick says that he’s quitting because Jimmy is now on the team. Toby being the typical weasel tells him to go cry to Snake about it and he might change his mind. Emma goes on to say that Jimmy and the rest hate his guts because they don’t know him and that he came back to Degrassi because he wants to prove that he’s changed. She goes on to say that he should work with Jimmy on the team and in time he’ll get to know him. To prove his point, it says on his locker to go home and no one wants him there. Emma being a big shot rips the sign up and you can tell that Rick is starting to fall in love with her because that’s what guys like him do. They become infatuated at the first sign of kindness. Kind of like a dog if you will.

The next scene has Rick going to Raditch to complain about Jimmy being on the team and the fact that he picks on him alot. Raditch though doesn’t want to hear it and pretty much blows him off, telling him that he also has to work to make people like him. So yeah, this conversation is going to come back to bite Raditch right in the ass.

Out in the parking lot it seems that both Jay and Spinner got X’s on their cars. Alex correctly assumes that it was Rick who did it. Sean says that they should get it off right away before there’s permanent damage. Spinner acting like a bitch says that he’s going to tell Raditch. Sean mocks him of course because he wants to go and snitch on Rick. He goes on to point out that he’s going to want to know why Rick tagged him to begin with. Jay agrees with Sean and says that they need to keep Raditch out of it. Spinner vows that Rick is going to pay for what he did. Again, the machismo is strong in Spinner.

In the hallway they spot Toby having a drink at the fountain and that’s when Jay smashes his face against it. They want to know where Rick is but Toby surprisingly isn’t telling. In the gym Jimmy asks Toby who did it. Rick sounding bitter as hell asks Jimmy if wished that he had done it instead of Jay and Spinner. Jimmy tells him to back his shit off already. Rick tells him that he’s been suffering for weeks, and that Toby doesn’t deserve that, no one does. But I beg to differ on Toby. Anyways, that’s when you can tell that Jimmy feels bad about picking on the guy.

We switch to Joey where he starts to bitch Craig out about watching TV, but he’s shocked to see that Sidney is there. She tells him that Craig called her at work and let her know just what a giant loser Joey is. She’s probably thinking that she dodged a bullet there. She tells him that he should have told her about what was happening with the house. You can tell that his pride is wounded even though he shouldn’t have any. She get’s all sad and says that she made a mistake coming there and leaves.

In the gym the quiz show team is practicing and Rick is a genius at having useless knowledge. Sad to say, I’m the same exact way. To prove why Jimmy’s there Snake asks a sports question that Jimmy, the only brother there could answer. It’s obvious that Jimmy is starting to bond a little with Rick. Especially when Spinner comes along picking on him some more. Jimmy get’s annoyed and tells him to grow up. Alex all full of attitude says, “Oh look, Ricky found a friend.” Jimmy tells her, “Back off  you trailer park skank, it’s getting boring.” Rick fucks things up by being overconfident and does an X with his arms to Jay and Spinner. Both of them get pissed because he pretty much told them it was him who did it.

At his home Rick is being fitted in an ill fitting suit. Turns out it’s his dad’s, so no wonder. Here we get a glimpse at Rick’s instability. Toby comes by and Rick’s mom mentions to him how Rick’s new friends Jimmy and Emma have become pretty much inseparable from him and they’re the popular kids at school. Toby is shocked to hear that he told that to his mom because Toby knows that the both of them will never be part of the cool group.

Back at Joey’s, it seems like he still hasn’t cleaned the place up yet while Craig is still sick with what looks is the flu. Joey starts to bitch him out about calling Sidney over and asks how badly did he make him sound like the loser that he is. He then mentions that he has to close the dealership because he has to be there to sell the house. Hearing that he’s going to be there all day, Craig would rather be at school spreading his illness around because Joey’s become unbearable lately. Craig tells him that he should still get Sidney to help him because she actually knows what she’s doing and she’d get a good price for the home.

Outside the school Rick says thank you to Emma for actually talking to him and being decent. You can tell that he’s now infatuated with her because he says that when she talks, he listens and she’s his guide. Emma meanwhile doesn’t seem to notice and says that she’s glad that things worked out for him and that he actually made friends.

Inside Rick asks Jimmy if he’s nervous about the quiz show and Jimmy tries to play it cool, but admits that he is. Rick being confidant tells him not to worry about it because they’re going to kick the other school’s ass. Paige comes along and makes fun of his suit, but Rick is so giddy about his delusions of grandeur, he doesn’t give a shit what Paige has to say.

Seems like the show is being broadcast on public access and the game is called Wack Your Brain. Right off the bat Rick answers a question correct and they’re on the board. Funny how everyone in the school is watching the show. You would have thought that it would have been after school, but Degrassi always does things differently. Jimmy get’s to shine with answering a sports question, even though it was about tennis and he should be ashamed of himself for even knowing the right answer. As the game is progressing Degrassi is losing 170 to 180. The host then announces that in case there’s a tie each team will select one player to play the sudden death round. Of course the game is tied and they choose Rick to be their player. Being a fucking creep, he squeezes Emma’s hand and won’t let go of it. Emma seems mighty uncomfortable.

It’s break time and in the restroom Jimmy asks Rick how he has all sorts of useless knowledge. Rick just says that he reads a lot because he has a lot of free time on his hands due to having a lack of friends. Just then Jay and Spinner come along and they say what a good player Rick is. Jimmy leaves saying that they have the game in the bag thanks to him. Just as Rick is leaving Jay and Spinner block his path making him nervous. But Jay says that they’re cool and let him go by. As he heads out they both start talking about a plan to get him back and it involves Alex.

Back at Joey’s, it seems like he talked Sidney into coming back. She asks him if there’s anything that he can say to make her stay. Not having anymore dignity, Joey simply says that he needs help, badly.  She tells him that she can stay there all day telling him how much she hates him, but his family is in trouble and she’s willing to let everything pass. Joey then apologizes over how they finished, but she just ignores him. So what was the point of that?! She starts to talk about having an open house and to maybe have some music playing for atmosphere. She tells him not to play his hit single Everybody Want’s Something, because they actually want to make a sale. I was just thinking, if they’re losing their house, does this mean that they’re going to live in the trailer Joey has at his car lot? But shit, he’s about to lose his business too.

The Quiz show is back on and we see Alex barely sitting down in her seat. It’s obvious she was up to no good. The geek from Northern has scored 40 points. Before going up Rick whispers into Emma’s ear, “This is all for you.” Man Emma is becoming disturbed with his behavior by the minute. Rick of course wins the whole thing by ten points and is basking in the glory of being the hero of the show. But it’s short lived, just as he’s celebrating a bucket of yellow looking paint falls all over him. The insult to injury is that feathers follow. He’s beyond humiliated because everyone there is laughing their fucking asses off at him. Probably in the whole city too. They’re lucky that he doesn’t have any mental powers or else he would have killed everyone there in his rage like in Carrie.

Out in the hallway Emma tries to play do gooder by saying that the people who did it are totally juvenile. In his grief Rick says that they’re life ruiner’s and everyone was laughing at him. Emma being stupid is still trying to cheer him up by saying that no one is ever going to forget that it was him who won the game and that he’s the smartest guy in the whole city. Rick takes it that that means that Emma is in love with him and he tries to force a kiss on her. Emma now freaked out pulls away and yells at him to stop. Rick now completely out of his mind says that he thought that she loved him. Emma makes things about ten times worse by saying that she only felt sorry for him and besides, she has a body now and she can have whoever she wants.

Oh lord we go back to Joey’s and he’s busy cleaning up his house when there’s someone ringing the door bell. Turns out that it’s Caitlin and she’s finally back from her ten month Aids tour around the world. She then wants to know why Sidney’s name is on his lawn because Caitlin is crazy and insecure.

In the next scene we see Rick coming home and he’s calling out to see if his parents are home. You can tell that he’s relieved that they aren’t because that would have just been another humiliation having to explain what happened. In his despair he goes into his dad’s study and takes out a case that has his dad’s 45 in there. The episode ends with Rick just staring at the gun.

So yeah, this was a pretty good episode. Rick is obviously some one who is deeply troubled and probably needs to see a therapist. Especially since it’s clear that he makes up relationships in his head. But it’s too late for that. Things are definitely coming to a head in the next episode. As for the Joey sub plot, who cares. Not even Caitlin coming back was enough to save that stinker. That was probably the only thing wrong with this episode. But stayed tuned for the conclusion in a few days.