Degrassi The Next Generation Reviewed

Ah yes, the companion blog to Degrassi Junior High Reviewed. Each episode will be reviewed in order by a guy who loves the next generation's melodrama.

Season 4, Episode 14, “Secret Part 1”

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Hey there Degrassi maniacs, yes it’s been awhile since I last posted an episode review. I originally intended on starting up again once I got settled into moving into my fiance’s house back in June. But as usual, things don’t go as planned. First she was diagnosed with cervical cancer, we were devastated to hear this news. But luckily they caught it early and she beat it. Then while she was recovering, about a week after her surgery I got this horrible pain in my gut and I was diagnosed with Diverticulitis. They said it was a mild case of it. I can’t imagine how a full blown attack feels like because that hurt like a motherfucker. Anyways, needless to say, it was a pretty shitty Summer for the both of us but it’s now November and we’re both recovering nicely. I may be rusty at doing this again, so bare with me.

Pre Credit Opener: Ah, I just noticed that this is the big episode where Emma sucks Jay’s nasty dick. So we’re in for a real treat with this one. We open with Johnny Mathis going over his lines for Liberty’s stupid Dracula play. Jay notices Emma just standing there and he starts to massage her shoulders, saying how tense she is. Jay noticing that Emma doesn’t mind one bit that he’s touching her decides to risk it and feels her tight little ass next. Or is he fingering her asshole? I can’t tell. She get’s yelled at by JT because she missed her cue and all she does is look back at Jay with a confused look on her face. Probably because she liked it I’m guessing.

After class the teacher who was played by the same guy who worked for LD’s dad from Degrassi Junior High is telling Emma that her participation grade is going really low and he knows that she went through a lot with the shooting, but she needs to get her head out of her ass already. Emma just stands there with a blank look on her face and just leaves. She stops in her tracks and gawks at Jay and Alex making out. Jay sees her and says the classic line of, “Why don’t you take a picture it’ll last longer.” But he’s looking at her with lust in his eyes.

Outside the school Ashley is really worried about Craig for some reason. Ellie tells her that it’s so not her job to be worrying about him all the time. Which just goes to show how dead Ellie is inside after Sean dumped her. Craig comes by and is eating his lunch like a slob. Craig stops swallowing his food into his mouth and asks Ashley what they were talking about. Ashley tells him not to worry and she hasn’t told anyone that he’s a bi polar asshole. She then makes the mistake of asking him if he’s thought about going to a support group with other fucked up individuals as himself. Craig of course doesn’t want to talk about it and get’s annoyed with her. Which isn’t hard, Ashley can be irritating. She then makes a deal with him that he should at least go for one night and if he hates it, he doesn’t have to go back again. Yeah, that’s going to work out well.

In the next scene they’re still rehearsing Liberty’s stupid play and it’s obvious that Darcy sucks ass at acting. Emma corrects her one too many times and she gets annoyed at her. JT is going insane because she just happens to be the leading lady. He then pretty much fires her and she goes off in a huff. Emma starts to recite more lines back stage and Manny tells her to just go for it, but she’s in depressed mode right now so her confidence is at an all time low. Meanwhile Amy is going on about her cheap bracelets missing, why even mention this? Because it’s integral to the plot that’s why!

We cut to the teen support group and Craig is already boring people with his problems. He quickly clams up because surprise, surprise Ellie walks in and he knows he’s fucked because she now knows how fucked up he is. But really? Everyone knows how messed up he is so no one would really be surprised.

The next day Jay pulls up to Emma showing off his car because he’s seen the Fast and the Furious one too many times. Emma accepts and get’s in the car and they talk about Sean and how much they miss him. She does at least. They pull up to her house and he asks her if she wants to go to the park where all the bad Degrassi kids hang out. Emma walks in and hears Spike talking about how worried she is about her acting like a basket case and Spike should know because she acted the same way in Degrassi High. Down in her room Manny calls her but she ignores her. She then decides to go hang out with that scumbag Jay at the park.

She get’s there and it’s like a scene from the Outsiders where all the greasers were hanging out with a bon fire going on. She asks him if he thinks that she’s weird and he tells her that she’s no more weirder than the rest of them. Suddenly these two people come out of this junked out van and it’s obvious they did the nasty in it. Emma asks him what’s in the van and Jay now being horny asks her if she wants to see. Because Emma is predictable she goes in there with him. Jay just goes for it and kisses her. He explains to her that the van is used for people to suck dick in there. She panics and starts to leave, but Jay being a walking hard on gives her one of the cheap bracelets that Amy was going on about and says that every player get’s a prize.

The next day of class JT and Liberty are irritating as hell talking about the stupid play. JT is in deep shit because he lost his leading lady. Emma stands up and starts to say more lines from the play. Liberty being a shit head tells her that they need someone reliable and that she’s been off lately. Emma convinces JT pretty quickly because he’s desperate.

In the hallway Ashley tells Craig all about her two dad’s big gay honeymoon, but all he’s concerned with is that they think he’s insane. But he did act like a fucking maniac in front of everyone. Craig acting like a little bitch tells her that she sent him to Ellie’s group on purpose and then Ashley has the nerve to be offended when he tells her that she didn’t think about his feelings. Which is kind of true.

We go back to rehearsals and Emma fucks things up by laughing when she’s supposed to kiss Dracula. Back stage Amy and Alex are making fun of Emma because they somehow know that she’s afraid of some penis. That or they’re just bitches who assume that she’s a goodie two shoes. Emma all full of herself shows her bracelet to Amy and tells her that it’s hers, even though she never sucked Jays hairy root. Amy and her very thin eye brows is very confused for some reason. Alex for once has no idea what the both of them are talking about. Which is surprising.

After school Emma tells Jay how Amy shut up when she showed her her cheap ass bracelet. Jay tells her that maybe she should shut up about it because she didn’t earn anything and Amy did. Emma asks him if Amy earned it from him. He tells her that there’s plenty of skanks in that ravine and she should feel lucky because he picked her. Emma being stupid feels really complimented by that.

At Joeys Ellie comes by and asks Craig if he knows how to restring a guitar. He quickly see’s right through the ploy and she admits that Ashley made her go. She then goes on to say that she’s a cutter and he says that he knows. Shit, the whole school knows since she’s emo as fuck. She tries to talk to him by saying that she’ll always be a cutter and that he should just accept it. She then desecrates Kirk Cobain’s name by mentioning it next to Craig’s and says that if he would have accepted it, things would have been different. She then tells him that he should go back to the group, but he should also talk to Ashley too. He tells Ellie that all she wants to talk to him about is his craziness and that she’s bringing him down with that bullshit.

Back at the park Emma comes up to Jay and says she wants a tour of the jizz filled van. Seriously, that’s fucking disgusting, but it seems Emma doesn’t mind one bit. They go into the van and yeah. Emma is going to go to town on Jay’s wang saying, “Hello boner.”

In the next scene Craig is telling Ashley that he did like Ellie group and that he’ll most likely go back again. Ashley apologizes for the shit that she pulled but is glad that he’s going back. He tells her that he wants to be her boyfriend and not some crazy bastard that she has to save all the time. Pretty much he tells her to cut her shit out already.

Uh oh. Emma is sneaking into her room in the basement and she’s caught by a very pissed off Spike. Emma lies and tells them that she went out for a walk. She finally breaks down and tells Spike that ever since the shooting, she can’t sleep and is deathly afraid of the world. They  feel sorry for her and tell her that they’ll be time to talk in the morning. The episode ends with her having a smug look on her face and is proud to have another bracelet on her wrist.

So this was an interesting episode. I can’t wait until the stupid play is over with, because really who cares about that shit and I’m a fan of Dracula, but not when JT and Liberty get their hands on it. Craig’s story line is also played out, how much more can they squeeze out of his mental illness? This being Degrassi, the answer is plenty since they like to cover any topic that can affect every Human being on the planet. The highlight of course is Emma gurgling Jay’s meat on a van down by the river! Stay tuned for part two. I promise it won’t take six months for the next review.

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Author: Degrassi TNG Guy

Well what's there to know. I got bored after finished Degrassi Junior High Reviewed, so I thought, why not do The Next Generation. Even though I vowed that I wouldn't. Well hope you guys enjoy these reviews as well. I definitely see this as the companion series to DJHR.

4 thoughts on “Season 4, Episode 14, “Secret Part 1”

  1. FANTASTIC! I’m loling at my desk again. Welcome back. I’m glad you and your fiance are okay.

    Like

  2. Firstly, I’m happy to hear that you and your fiancé are doing well now! And oh my gosh, I love the way you write; you’re hilarious!!! 😀

    Like

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