Degrassi The Next Generation Reviewed

Ah yes, the companion blog to Degrassi Junior High Reviewed. Each episode will be reviewed in order by a guy who loves the next generation's melodrama.


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Season 4, Episode 20, “West End Girls”

So finally after over a year I think, we’re finally going to finish season four. This was a jammed packed season with a lot happening. Sean left, Rick died, Jimmy became a cripple and Spinner got expelled for being an asshole. Well, let’s finish this turkey.

Pre-Credit Opener: The girls are in cheer practice and right away we can tell that Manny resents the hell out of Paige for barking orders. Mrs Hatzalokos says that their new routine is the tits and that’s when Darcy says that it’s all thanks to Manny’s choreography. Paige not liking that Manny is getting the spot light says that as captain of the squad, (Manny makes a sour face as she says this) that she’s proud of them for their hard work. Manny can’t help but say that Paige is pretty useless and hasn’t done a thing the whole time. Of course Paige isn’t going to just let that slide. She asks if Manny has anything to say and surprisingly Manny says no and it’s all her.

Oh lord Toby is in the next scene. He’s hardly been on this season and it’s been a blessing. But he has to ruin it by saying that if Manny was his prom date he wouldn’t let Paige get away with shit. Manny makes a face and tries to ignore what he just said and starts to go off on Paige again. But Toby won’t be stopped. He tells her, “Did you hear the part where I asked you to the prom?” Manny’s all, “Yeah, that’s a hard no for me dweeb.” Lucky for her Marco comes to the rescue and says that Manny is going with him because he’s the newly single leader of the dance committee. This whole scene just proved what a born loser Toby is. He just lost the school skank to Degrassi’s top gay. Can’t get any lower than that. Anyways, Manny get’s annoyed when Marco says that the rest of the gang is coming, including Paige with Matt. As a known pedophile you would think that Matt would be barred from going.

In line for their year books Manny wants Hazel to play peacemaker between her and Paige. She mentions that she should join them when they go shopping because Paige is a weirdo and she becomes emotional when they do that.

We then cut to Caitlin’s station where she’s interviewing motherfucking Silent Bob himself Kevin Smith. Apparently he’s in town to shoot a new movie there called Jay and Silent Bob Go Canadian Eh. Craig is there for some reason and he becomes excited, almost psychotic when Kevin mentions that a few locations they were going to use fell through, including a school. Gee I wonder if Degrassi’s going to be mentioned? Right away Craig ambushes him and is completely star struck. Caitlin mentions that Craig is going to her old school. She’s all, “It’s called Degrassi. Maybe you’ve heard of it?” But why would he, unless he saw the school name in a headline when Rick shot Jimmy then himself. Craig mentions that he should come check out the school because he and Ashley will be playing the prom. As the bullshit meter rises, Kevin mentions that he’s just looking to find a musician for his new movie and gives Craig the number to his music supervisor. Poor Kevin, he has no idea that Craig and Ashley only make shitty emo music.

In the next scene Paige is trying to fit into a dress that’s too small for her, but she insist’s that it fits. As she steps out of the dressing room she’s beyond pissed that Manny is wearing the same thing and it looks way better on her. Manny tries to apologize, but Paige all aggressive and tells her to get out of the dress and out of her face.

In Joey’s garage Craig is all excited barely listening to Ashley. He wants to write a new shitty song right away. She mentions that she got herself a Summer job and it’s with the BBC in England. Craig tells her to forget about it and says that they’ll be working on Kevin Smith’s new movie. Isn’t he jumping the gun here though? I don’t think they’ve been hired just yet.

At the food court Paige is upset because Matt has gotten a job for the Summer up in the Yukon because he’s a broke dick loser. Paige tells Marco that Matt is leaving before the prom and he won’t be back for months. The scene just abruptly cuts and we’re in the gym where Marco is telling Manny that he can’t go to the prom with her because he has to go with Paige because she’s upset. Manny now pissed is hearing that Paige is changing the choreography because she can’t do the moves. Manny offers to show her, but Paige counters by saying that she’ll do the jumping part that Manny did and regulates Manny to being the mascot. Hazel mentions that they’ve never caught Paige before. But she’s being a cunt and threatens them by saying they’ll be off the squad if they don’t do her bidding.

Out in the hallway Darcy mentions that she wishes that they could get rid of Paige and you can tell that Manny has an evil plan brewing. Seems that there’s an assembly going on and Kevin is there with Caitlin filming things with his camcorder. We’re starting to see that he has a thing for her and is starting to flirt a little. The spirit squad starts to do their thing and Hazel and the black chick, I still don’t remember her name throw Paige up into the air and fail to catch her. Paige lands horribly on her ankle while Darcy and the black chick laugh their fucking asses off, making it obvious that they did it on purpose.

We cut to Craig and Ashley with the music supervisor and going by the look on his face, it’s clear that he thinks that Craig and Ashley suck ass too. They say that they can change everything to how he wants it. But he goes off on them and pretty much tells them that they’re horrible and kicks them out of his office. It’s about time that someone told them the truth.

Back at the boutique Emma and Manny are now looking for dresses and Manny is bummed because the selection sucks. She still wants the dress that Paige picked up, so in the spirit of fuck it. She decides to get the dress because the hell with Paige.

It’s finally time for the prom and what a surprise Liberty and JT are in charge of taking tickets and the ballot box for King and Queen. Just then Darcy comes by and she’s feeling extremely rotten because Paige broke her ankle thanks to them. Manny being heartless tells her to chill out and who cares because Paige is a twat. To shut her up, Manny votes Paige for queen.

Turns out that Paige is still going to the prom on crutches. She seems to be high on her pain meds and is being super annoying because she’s complaining about how shitty her life is at the moment. Funny how Jimmy and Hazel are done with her complaining and tell her to stop crying over fucking spilled milk. Jimmy’s all, “I’m in a wheelchair and my dick doesn’t work. Stop complaining.” Hazel then goes off on her saying that she’s ruining Jimmy’s night and lets her know that Manny was doing great with the spirit squad while Paige was too busy fucking around with Matt. A little thank you would have been great. Paige all childish says that Manny was being horrible to her. That’s when Hazel says that Paige is the type of person that just has to be even worse to the person to get even. Finally that shut her up. Glad Hazel told her what’s what.

Poor Manny she ended up being stuck with that dud Toby after all. You can tell that he’s in heaven right now. Pressing his little pecker against her body. Manny wants to go get a drink to get away from him, but he won’t let go like a creep. Suddenly Manny grabs Emma and trusts her against Toby. Him being hard up doesn’t care who he’s pressed up against as long as it’s a warm hot body. Kevin and Caitlin show up and she’s still trying to get him to shoot his movie there at the school.

Paige is voting for the king and queen and that’s where Manny spots her and says that she’s like the damn Terminator. Nothing can keep her down. Paige in a rage asks her what she’s wearing. But then quickly collects herself and wishes her luck. Oh lord we get some shots of Craig and Ashley playing the prom and they’re just horrible. It was probably Marco who hired them to play. The rest of the school should be booing telling them to get off the stage. But no, they’re faking like they like it. Including Kevin Smith. Meanwhile Paige is backstage changing the votes so that Manny can win. Just like in Carrie.

Ashley and Craig step out for a bit and he’s on cloud nine because Kevin seemed to have liked their shitty song. Ashley also happy gives him a kiss and says that she’s going to miss him. Craig doesn’t understand and that’s when she says that she’s still going to take the job with the BBC. Immediately Craig is bummed. I’m just wondering how Ashley got that gig. I know I sound like I’m beating a dead horse, but she sucks as a musician. But that’s what the Degrassi writers want us to believe.

It’s now time for king and queen and of course Manny wins by a landslide thanks to Paige. Manny is beyond happy because she was having a horrible night being stuck with Toby. Her joy is short lived because Paige trips and falls, ripping Manny’s dress off, showing her body to the student body. Ha, see what I did there? But it’s not like everyone there hasn’t seen it already. Half of her outfits she was pretty much nude. She then falls off the stage, but Kevin catches her. As she’s crying Kevin tells Caitlin that they’ll definitely be shooting there.

Outside the gym Craig is still sitting there depressed and that’s when Kevin spots him. They have a heart to heart about relationships and the fact that the music guy hated them. Kevin mentions that he’s had a lot of girl trouble and hardly get’s the girl. He tells Craig to try and get over Ashley by going home and working on a new God awful song for his movie.

In the girls restroom Manny is busy changing because she was just humiliated by Paige in front of the entire school. Paige walks in feeling bad now and tries to apologize. They both start to go off on each other telling each other’s transgressions. Paige then mentions the fact that Manny got Matt fired and she hates her for it. Suddenly they both calm down and it seems that just like that, their beef is over because it’s now Summer. Oh lord, teenage girls, I’m telling you.

So this was an ok episode. I hate that Paige and Manny’s season long feud ended like nothing happened. I guess the writers were just saying fuck it, the season’s over so let’s just end this bullshit. Craig and Ashley are no more, again. And once again I could give two fucks about their relationship. But there it was peeps, the season four finale. I would say this season started out strong, but half way started to suck thanks to Paige’s relationship problems. Let’s see what season five brings because I have no memory of it. So it’ll be new to me again.

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Season 4, Episode 18, “Modern Love”

Hey there Degrassi fans. I’m sure some of you regular readers have noticed that I’ve been really irregular with posting more reviews. The honest truth is that I lose interest, get interested again after a few months and then quickly lose interest again. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that a lot of episodes in this season have sucked ass. But I’m trying to motivate myself into posting more reviews in May, as in, may I please fucking complete this season already? I may fail in this goal because reading the episode description I can tell that this episode is going to also suck and I’ve been writing this review for a few days already. But you know what? We didn’t come this far to just take a shit and then eat it, we’re finishing this bitch.

Pre-Credit Opener: Paige and her pedo boyfriend are out having a romantic picnic and she’s going on about how a good student teacher he is. He’s going on about how scared he is of his class because the next day he’s going to be graded on how well they respond to him. She tells him not to worry about Marco and Heather St Claire because he’s nothing but a little bitch and so is she. They start to make fun of this dad who has no hair on his legs and holy shit, turns out that it’s Snake taking his baby out for a stroll. Paige puts on her shades and her stupid pink cowboy hat to disguise herself. But I think it only brings more attention towards them. She thinks the coast is clear, but it kind of seems like Snake spotted them anyways. Fingers crossed that this is the end of their relationship in this episode, because this stupid bullshit has gotten old fast.

In the next scene Paige isn’t there to lead the cheer squad again, so Manny takes it upon herself to take over. Hazel can’t help telling her that she doesn’t like that at all. Manny with a huge nasty zit on her forehead tells Hazel that Paige doesn’t give a mother fuck because she’s too busy with Matt. Hazel blows it off as it being just a student teacher thing, and that’s when stupid Manny let’s on that Paige and him are linked romantically. Going by her facial expression, Hazel is hurt on not finding out this information from Paige directly.

In the MI lab Mr Wonderful is teaching Emma’s class and they’re having a discussion about Cigarettes that are being geared towards woman. Matt tries to engage even more with Emma and asks her where she thinks the woman in the ad is going. Chris mumbles that she’s probably going to the ravine. Pow! If you remember Emma was sucking Jay’s dick a couple of episodes ago and got and STD I think. Matt tells him to shut his mouth and Snake looks at Chris like he’s going to do something. But Snake is a giant pussy as we all know and isn’t going to do a goddamn thing about it. Emma then starts to name all the stuff the chick will get if she continues smoking. Mumble mouth then says, “Gonorrhea.” Matt now angry tells him that he’ll see him after class. I think Chris is just jealous because she never got on his Alabama black snake.

Apparently now it’s Paige’s class being taught by her boyfriend. Hazel is trying to get her attention, but Paige being in love wants her to shut up so she can listen to him. Hazel won’t be stopped though, she asks Paige if Manny is her new bestfriend. Paige doesn’t know what she’s talking about and that’s when Hazel throws Manny under the bus and lets her know that she told her about their relationship. This of course only get’s her in trouble again and Matt asks her if she has a problem. Hazel being full of sass tells him that she thought that he only had eyes for Paige. Everyone starts whispering and Matt is at a loss for words. So much so that he can’t teach anymore. Which only shows how guilty he is.

Outside the school Manny asks Emma what’s wrong and Emma is so angry she’s trying to kill that mumbling fuck with her mind. Manny and the other girls tell her not to let guys get to her. That’s when Chester comes along and acts all obnoxious with them. After he picks at her food, Darcy thinks that he’s the cat’s meow. To cheer Emma up, Manny proposes that they have a girls only spa weekend. By the way, there’s a new black chick there and I can’t think of her name, but she’ll be joining the cast in later seasons.

In the back of the school Matt is all frazzled now that Hazel fucked with him that way. Paige promises that it’ll never happen again. But Matt is clearly freaking out and says, “I don’t want to be booted out of teacher’s college!” I can’t help but think, it’s not just college? There’s a teacher’s college in Canada? Anyways, Paige vows that that won’t happen, but we all know that Matt is going to be boned by his relationship with her.

In the hallway Manny tells Paige to have a good weekend. But Paige is severely annoyed at Manny, simply ignores her. Pissing Manny off now. Paige now angry asks why she opened her big mouth with Hazel. Manny says that she thought that she knew already. They have more angry words, with Paige calls her a boy crazy whore and that’s when Manny kicks her right in the kiester. Paige then slaps the shit out of her and we have a full blown cat fight on our hands. Mrs Hatzilakos and Matt come and break it up with Matt telling Manny to calm the fuck down. That’s when Manny decides to be a life ruining bitch and calls him a pedophile and tells everyone about their relationship. Right away Mrs Hotass takes Paige and Matt into her office.

Outside her office Paige is telling Marco that everyone is going to hate her if she ends up being the reason that he get’s fired. I love how she’s only thinking about what people are going to think of her. I mean, fuck his career or his life. Marco once again being a girl tells her that it wasn’t her fault, because she was in love. But please, this was just puppy love right here and he took advantage of her because he wanted some teenage poon.

Matt walks out of the office and Mrs Hotass calls her in. Paige immediately starts to go off on Manny, calling her a lying cunt. Mrs Hotass asks her if they have a relationship going on and Paige of course denies it. Only a fool would admit that. She then says that she wants to have Snake, Matt’s teacher adviser and her parents at a meeting to discuss this situation. Ha. This finally has gotten better. Paige get’s her heartbroken because Matt told Mrs Hatzilakos that Paige is a fucking psychopath who’s obsessed with him and has been a stalker for months. I gotta say, it’s kind of true.

It’s time for Emma’s relaxing spa weekend at home and the girls are outside with shit on their faces. Emma for the time being is being a huge man hater and is appreciating the time she’s having with the girls. It’s short lived because apparently Chester is Emma’s neighbor and Darcy and the black chick who just showed up are excited and embarrassed that he’s there because they like him for some reason.

Back at the rat’s nest that’s Matt’s apartment, Paige comes up banging on the door like she’s the damn police. She barges in and want’s to know why he fucked her over. He tells her that he can’t get caught because his life will be over. He wants them to wait until Summer where he’ll be free to ravage her sexually whenever he wants. But Paige has the fury of a woman scorned and doesn’t want to hear this shit. Especially since she’s the one coming off as an unstable stalker. After some more back and forth between these two he simply says, “My entire future is on the line.” Meaning, go along with it you stupid little bitch.

You know, every episode has to have a stupid, boring, or unfunny story line going on and this with Emma and her friends is it. You guys pick which category it falls under. The girls are all outside in the world’s smallest front yard tie dyeing shirts. Why they couldn’t be in their backyard is beyond me. Manny of course seems to be just wearing a man’s shirt and nothing else. That’s when Chester and his other goofy looking brother’s come out of their house and start to play catch. Manny and the girls are pretty moist by spotting this trio and Manny instantly transforms herself into super skank. It’s fucking incredible how this happened. Turns out that Chester’s brother’s are as big as dickheads as he is and one of them throws the football at Emma and all this dye splashes all over her. This starts a massively lame feud between them.

At the movie theater Alex is telling Paige what a piece of shit Matt is for fucking her over. But Paige is still being pathetic and let’s Alex know that she misses him already. Dylan comes by fuming, demanding to know where Matt is so he can fuck him up. Marco meanwhile looks like he’s all scared by his machismo. Paige being an idiot is still defending him to Dylan and just makes herself look really dumb. But hey, what do you expect from a teenage girl? She doesn’t know any better.

Emma and the girls are still feuding with Chester and they do a stupid prank with a Christmas tree and femine products for ornaments. Before she can put the star on she get’s caught by the police. Thank God that shit is over with, seriously it wasn’t funny and it was clearly just to take up room in this episode.

Paige once again shows her stupidity by telling Matt that she’s willing to go along with his story and pretty much blames herself for losing her temper with Manny. She goes on to say not to worry because there’s no strings attached and she just leaves. Matt’s probably dancing for joy because he got her to go along.

At Degrassi Paige is telling everyone that she was being a loser stalker and she doesn’t want to cause anymore trouble, so she would like to transfer out of his class, effective immediately. Snake all full of piss and vinegar tells her that she’ll fail the class because there aren’t anymore MI classes to take and it’ll affect her getting into college. Paige still being a moron says that she’s willing to transfer schools but Mrs H tells her that she’ll probably lose her year because it’s so close to the end of the school year. Snake asks her if she’s really thinking everything through. Man everyone is on her case here. But oh shit. Now we know why Snake is so pissed off for. He goes off on Matt and says that he trusted him with his kids. Mrs Hotass asks him what the fuck he’s talking about. He then tells Mrs Hatzilakos that he saw something between them, but won’t say what. Goddamn it Snake! Once again, you’re a big pussy. Paige now in tears just wants the matter closed and is willing to fail. But Matt can’t take it anymore and admits that they had a relationship going on, seeing each other outside of school. Probably porking her too.

Outside her house Emma tells Chester that she only got a warning from the police. Turns out that Chester’s brother’s are named Chuck and Chad. Jesus Degrassi, can you get anymore ludicrous? Anyways, it’s obvious that Chester likes her and is going to protect her from his idiot brothers.

Finally it’s the end of the episode and Matt tells Paige that he can stay in the aid program, but teacher’s college is done. I’m surprised they let him stay at the school after that shit. Paige acts all shocked and tries to make things right, but Matt knows that his career is over. Strange that he rejoices in the fact that he can now be seen in public with Paige. This motherfucker has no shame and is glad to still have his teenage girlfriend. I would say he’s indifferent about not being able to molest future students.

So it’s about time that we got a more interesting episode. Too bad Paige hasn’t learned her lesson. Actually there were hardly any consequences for Matt except being kicked out of “Teacher’s College.” You would have thought that they would have brought charges on his ass for banging a minor. But no, he got away with it Scott free. I’m not even going to mention Emma’s plot, that shit stunk so bad we smelled it all the way down here in the states from Toronto.


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Season 4, Episode 17, “Queen Of Hearts”

So I’m back all you Degrassi maniacs. Happy New Years. Yeah, I know it’s February but better late than never right? Reading what this episode is about, I’m already bored and annoyed. Hopefully it’s not as bad as I think it is.

Pre-credit Intro: We open with Ellie living like a slob in Sean’s pad with her army of rodents. She hears a knock on the door and a guy who apparently has no hair on his body is telling her that it’s the end of the month and the rent is due. She tells him that she knows and that she’ll write him a check. He mentions that she was late with the rent last month and doesn’t believe her bullshit excuses anymore. He then notices that the lamp seems to be flickering and she lets it out that it’s her pet ferret, but apparently it chewed through the cable and killed itself. Pretty clear it chose suicide than to keep living with Ellie.

Outside the school Ellie is telling the gang what happened to her ferret. Alex is the only one who seems amused by this news. Ellie goes on to say that she’s been pretty down since Sean left and seems to be more lonely than usual. Marco throwing her some pity tells her that he’ll be there after school so that they could have a rat funeral but she mentions that she’ll be having dinner with her mom that evening. Seems that she’s only seeing her mom to get rent money. That’s pretty fucked up.

I forgot all about Paige and her relationship with the student teacher. Right away she get’s annoyed with him because he calls on Hazel instead of her in class. So of course she just has to confront him on it. But I guess it’s not a big deal. Ok. She goes on to ask him out on a date to the movies that night. Manny comes along and tells her that the new uniforms are in. It’s awkward as hell because Manny just happened to see him pawing at Paige during the last school dance.

It’s dinner time and it’s as tense as it can get between Ellie and her mom. I love how Ellie is being a bitch to her even though she’s giving her money to live on her own, which she really can’t do. Her mom asks her how she is and is proud of her for being independent. She goes on to say that she hasn’t had a drink since she left and wants her to come home because she misses her. Ellie of course is being difficult and tells her that she doesn’t need her anymore or her money. Shit, I can tell that her mom is going to go on a huge binge because of that. Nice going Ellie.

In the next scene Marco and Ellie are giving her ferret a funeral and yeah, I could careless.

At the Degrassi mall Paige is just meeting up with her pedo boyfriend and that’s when the manager of the movie theater tells her that everyone is sick and she’s going to have to work. He stops her from getting herself fired and tells her to go to work. Paige of course can’t help rolling her eyes.

Back at Ellie’s, Ellie is obviously distraught because she’s a lonely loser. Marco then asks her if she wants to go play poker with Dylan’s hockey team. He pretty much let’s on that it’s easy money because they’re a bunch of stupid meat head jocks. We then start to hear the theme song from the Hustler and I’m surprised that they could have afforded the music rights to that. The next day Marco and Ellie are now playing poker with Craig , Jimmy and Alex and Jesus Christ I’m so bored with this episode already.

In class her boyfriend calls on her to define what lying means and he gives her a note in front of everyone. This guy has no shame as he’s making out with her down in the boiler room. Having enough she tells him that she wants to come over to his place because she wants to know how he lives. He gives the impression that he’s embarrassed at how poor he is because he’s just a student teacher, but I think it’s because he doesn’t want anyone to know that he’s going out with a high school girl. He tells her no and we all know that Paige hates it when she doesn’t get her way.

Down in the Degrassi basement, Ellie and the gang are still playing poker and I guess Ellie is now a poker winning champion. Feeling full of herself, she wants her and Alex to play with Dylan’s hockey team.

In the gym Manny mentions that Mr O is good looking and Paige agree’s even mentioning his hot bulge. Paige confesses that she doesn’t like the fact that he’s trying to keep her a secret even though she full well knows that he would get into deep shit if anyone found out that he was messing around with her, but Paige is selfish and wants her way. Manny makes things worse by saying that there’s not a lot of honesty going on with the two of them and she’s surprised that he doesn’t have a girlfriend. Paige mentions that he did but they split. Manny then says, “That’s what he told you.” So yeah, that’s now inside Paige’s head.

So it seems like the big poker party is at Ellie’s place, but it’s a shame that she and Alex can’t get into the game because Dylan’s team play for big money. That’s when stupid Ellie decides to use the rent money that her mom gave her. Shit, everyone can see a mile away how this is going to turn out. I gotta point out how girly Marco looks by serving everyone deserts from a tray.

Anyways, we then get a montage of the poker marathon and Ellie is going through high’s and lows as they either win or lose. Alex then convinces her to use all the money that she has so they can continue to play. Ellie feeling good about everything asks Alex to move in with her. Alex loves the idea because she has such a shitty home life, but she can’t afford to move out. Ellie again goes off on her mom saying how horrible she is for almost burning the house down when she was drunk. Alex then points out that at least her mom sobered up and is paying her rent. She should be so lucky since her own mom is a piece of shit.

At the mall Paige is calling customer service about her phone not working. Yeah, they point out that it’s fine since she’s talking to them on it. Paige is obviously having a melt down because Mr Wonderful hasn’t called her all night. Shit you know it’s bad when even her manager thinks that she’s being played for a fool and getting cheated on.

Seems like Ellie and Alex are a point away from losing the game, but Alex is confident that they’ll win with the hand that she has and she tells Ellie to go for it with her rent money. Alex tells her to sit her ass down and holy shit, they actually won. Alex leaves all disgusted at Ellie for not having any faith in her. I don’t blame Ellie because I sure as hell didn’t think they were going to win.

Paige now completely out of her mind goes to her boyfriend’s apartment and is demanding to know why he hasn’t been calling her all night. She barges in and the place is a real shit hole with water leaking from the ceiling. She feels bad because he’s been battling the fight against dirty shit water coming down into his apartment. She’s finely happy though because he says that they’re in a relationship and she tells him that she’s staying.

We end the episode with Ellie and her mom having a heart to heart discussion. She calls her mom over and lets her know that she’s written a letter to the land lord giving him a two month’s notice. But before she moves in she wants to make sure that her mom has stopped drinking for good. All her mom says that she can do is that she can try as it’s a day to day thing. With that Ellie finally decides to go home.

So fuck, this episode sucked so bad. It was obviously just a filler episode with nothing really happening. So Ellie decided to go back home, whoopie fucking doo. Who cares? The whole Paige storyline is boring as hell too and they’re dragging it out because everyone can see that it’s not going to end well. If I graded these episodes this one would definitely get an F minus. I feel like my time was wasted and I’ll never get it back watching this stinker.


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Season 4, Episode 13, “Bark At The Moon”

Holy moley, it seems like this season is dragging for me. I thought I was about to finish and I’m about half way through it. But fuck it, lets go with another review of Degrassi.

Pre-Credit Opener: Spinner is busy as hell at The Dot waiting tables while Manny is there waiting for him. Spinner gives her a kiss and we can all tell he wants to talk to her for a bit, but she sounds like an idiot going on about a horrible stupid song that just came on the jukebox. Right away we find out what this episode is going to be about. Spinner wants to be official with her, while Manny just wants a fuck buddy.

In the next scene Manny is giving a tour to a new kid who looks like he’s from the great, great north of Canada. He asks if she’s giving the tour because of Rick being killed, but she says, actually, I have no idea what the reason was and I’m too lazy to rewind it. Really who cares? Oh lord, the new kid’s name is Chester and she introduces him to Craig. Lucky for him he’s now medicated or else he would have beat his ass like he did Joey in the previous episode. Chester fucks off to eat some burritos while Craig has a talk with Manny. He apologizes for acting the way he did because he was a raging maniac at the time and he would have done things differently because their relationship was nothing but pain. Manny of course get’s highly offended by this and leaves in a huff. She still doesn’t get that she was just the side piece and there really wasn’t anything there.

In the hall way Paige and Marco are having a mini freak out because they’ve both been called up to the office. Paige grabs Manny and tells her to have a meeting with Raditch instead of her and she just leaves abruptly. Paige meanwhile goes to talk to the student teacher where she flirts with him some more but not before apologizing to him for seeing him at some bar. Conveniently he lets her know that his cunty girlfriend Charlie is now his ex. Paige being horny and desperate says that he’s probably her brother’s age and if he can bang Marco than Mr Wonderful here can totally get it on with Paige. He says that he can’t because he’s a teacher.

Outside the principles office Raditch comes out and tells Marco and Manny that he’s been reassigned to another school, meaning fired and the new principle is in his former office waiting for them. I do have to point out that when it came to the whole Rick thing, he really did fuck that up big time. Especially how he just blew him off. Anyways, they go into the office and Mrs Hatzilakos is now the principle, what a random person I swear. She goes on to say that she’s going to approve JT and Liberty’s stupid Dracula play and mentions that the school needs new great ideas to get their minds off of the fact that Rick is dead as a door nail and Jimmy is a cripple.

In the hallway again, Manny is telling Emma how Mrs Hotass wants a huge event to bring everyone’s spirits up and asks Emma for help, but Emma is still depressed about Rick wanting to murder her. Spinner comes along and gives Manny a stuffed animal and makes her happy. He brings her down about talking about being in a relationship and she leaves without giving an answer.

Outside the school, Manny and Marco are leaning towards having a dance. Chester comes by and says that everyone loves a school dance and that they can do a cupid thing by having a computer pair people up. Right away he flirts with Manny about having a dance with her and you can tell that her hormones are going into overdrive for his moley face. On the video announcements the next day Manny is telling everyone about the dance and how it’s going to work.

In yoga class Marco is giving Paige shit about wanting to be with the student teacher. But oh, it’s Mrs Kwan’s class now because Mr O has a huge workload and he doesn’t have time for that stupid shit. Of course he really didn’t want to do it anymore because Paige is just too in his face about wanting to be with him.

In the MI lab Chester is talking to Manny about the stupid dance and he asks her questions for the pairing. That’s when he asks her if she has a boyfriend and she tells him no, not anyone serious. Poor Spinner, but that’s what happens when you try to get with a ho. She tells him to put in his name and they’re a match of course. Just then Spinner spots them and interrupts their flirting.

Outside he asks her what she’s thinking about and if it’s about Chester. She tells him no, but she’s a fucking liar. She tells him not to worry because the next day all the dances are going to be with him, but that’s when he tells her that he can’t go because he was to work. She get’s all pissed off and says, “My own boyfriend can’t make it to the dance.” He points out that she never said if they were together or not. That’s when she get’s mad and says that that’s what he thinks they should do because it’s a childish thing, or something like that. Then she says, “If you can’t commit to a dance, how can you commit to me?” But it’s just her excuse to be able to fuck around.

In the next scene we see Mr Raditch giving a farewell speech. He mentions how much he loves Degrassi but that all good things must come to an end. That’s when he introduces Mrs Hotass as the new temporary principle. While she’s talking, Marco is pissed off at Manny because she broke Spinner’s heart. They can’t continue with their girl talk because Marco is supposed to present Raditch with a going away present. In bad taste it’s a lighter that looks like a gun. Hoo Ha! As everyone’s clapping Manny can’t help looking and smiling at Chester’s goofy looking ass.

At the computer she’s dismayed to see that she’s been paired with Johnny Mathis aka Danny. She then see’s who Chester’s with and it’s Darcy, who we haven’t seen in a couple of episodes already. Of course she cheats and changes the answers so she can be with him.

Finally it’s the dance and Manny is pissed off to see that she’s still paired with Danny. Marco tells her that the computer is supposed to decide not her. As he says that Chester is looking at her. I’m surprised he can see with his 70’s hair. She get’s all pissed and wonders why he would do that to her. He counters with how she could do that to Spinner, especially since he loves and cares about her. He goes on to tell her to stop being afraid of getting hurt like the previous year and just take a chance. Having no shame she goes up to Chester and you can tell that Darcy wants to tell her to fuck off because Chester is all hers! Chester being a piece of shit goes off to dance with Manny while Darcy get’s boned here.

Paige finally arrives and she asks who she was paired with. The student teacher, I don’t remember his name asks her who the lucky guy is and she says that it’s him. He get’s super uncomfortable and leaves with Paige following

Manny’s just standing there and that’s when Spinner comes along and holds her from behind. Manny get’s a huge smile on her face thinking that it’s Chester, but oh shit. It’s Spinner and the look on her face says it all. He tells her that she’s more important than his shitty job at the Dot. That’s when he opens up to her and tells her that he wants her to be his girlfriend because she’s fun, she makes him happy and she can suck a dick like no other. That’s when she continues to make excuses by saying that he’s on the rebound and why bother trying because they never work out. Chester with his perfect timing comes along with a drink for her. Surprisingly Spinner isn’t a dummy and figures out Manny’s game and tells Chester that Manny doesn’t know what she wants.

As the dance is going on Manny is still going on about the stupid song we heard at the beginning and Chester says that it sounds too Britney like, but that it’s ok. Manny then starts dancing, badly and Chester is so embarrassed by her he tells her that he has to go.

Oh lord, we come upon more drama with Paige and Mr O. He asks her why she’s acting the way she is. That right there tells me that he likes it because he would have just ignored her the rest of the night if he wasn’t interested. Paige asks him to stop acting like a jealous boyfriend and he either likes her or he doesn’t. That’s when he can’t take it anymore and he moves in to kiss her. Man this is all sorts of fucked up here. It’s funny how Manny ruins everything by spotting them. He just runs away like the pedophile that he is.

Out in the hallway Chester says that he’s sorry for just leaving, but out on the dance floor, her goofy dancing was just too embarrassing to stand. He goes in for a kiss and Manny tells him sorry because she already has a boyfriend. Chester get’s his heart broken and lamely says, “Welcome to Degrassi.”

Outside the school Mr O and Paige talk some more about their feelings and that’s when he goes for a kiss and actually does it. This guy has some real balls kissing her in front of the school where everyone can see them. He tells her that they need to be careful and they can’t be caught anymore. He’s definitely thinking with his dick because there is no way that a teenage girl like Paige or Marco can keep their mouth’s shut about something like that.

The episode ends with Manny telling Spinner how Craig treated her like shit and the whole thing hurt. She just doesn’t want to feel that way again and she makes him promise to never break her heart. Spinner promises not to break her little harlot’s heart, but who are we kidding here? Spinner is one of the biggest dickheads on the show. It’s inevitable if you ask me.

So I didn’t care too much about this episode. Way too much relationship drama. Yes, I do realize that this is what Degrassi is all about. But I could careless about Spinner and Manny’s problems. Probably because Manny is a little ho and Spinner is a dick so everyone knows that their relationship is doomed. Speaking of doomed, so is Paige’s romance. I love how the guy knows that she’s jail bait, but he doesn’t care because he just wants to get some teenage poon.


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Season 4, Episode 2, “Ghost In The Machine Part 2”

Pre-Credit Opener: We continue this two parter with Paige in despair in her room rearranging all her clothes. Marco comes along and invites her to come over to Dylan’s to have a good time. But she’s super pissed at the moment and just yells at him. Marco tries to relate to her by bringing up the time that he was gay bashed and the fact that the assholes who beat him up never got caught. Instead of feeling comforted, Paige lashes out at him, but then says that she’ll be down in a minute. Clearly she’s fine.

So they’re at a college party, but Paige can’t hang with the big dogs because it seems like she’s losing her damn mind. Her nostrils look like you can fit a quarter up there. Speaking of, Hazel looks like she’s going to swallow someone’s soul, Evil Dead style. Yikes! Spinner not having a brain tries to be affectionate with her, but she can’t abide anyone touching her at the moment. Especially a dude.

Paige then tries to pick a fight with this chick and Hazel tells her to cool off. And Jesus, the girl seems to be crying because Paige pushed her against the wall. At first I thought she was going to make out with her. Now acting the fool, she comes along and starts to flirt with these two guys that she’s never met, getting drunk with them. Spinner sees what’s going on and takes her aside to Dylan’s room. Inside, Paige is trying to pretty much sleep with him because she figures that she’s a slut who deserved what happened to her. Spinner tells her to let go of the fact that she was raped. At that point, taking her anger out on him, she tells him that she never wants to see his dumbass face again.

Mercifully, we cut away to Joey who seems to be going through his books. Craig and Ashley come in with his new guitar and amp. Joey is blown away by such a fine guitar but then he get’s pissed off that Craig wasted $4000 on it. In the garage Joey walks in and pretty pathetic on his part, he asks Craig for some money to  help pay the mortgage. Craig on the other hand is being a dick because he feels that Joey is just trying to mooch some money off of him. Mentioning how his dad’s estate gives him money. Joey says that it’s just $250 a month and it’s not enough. Craig then accuses Joey of just wanting his money and if it was Angela, he wouldn’t be asking her for help. But yes he would, I’m surprised Joey hasn’t asked Snake for money yet. Might I point out that Craig is the mooch because Joey didn’t have to take his ass in to begin with.

Back at the college, Hazel is worried about Paige because no one has seen her since her little meltdown. Spinner all hurt, could give two fucks where she is at the moment. But then you see a look of concern for her.

Paige meanwhile has gone to Dean’s frat house and you know only trouble is going to come from this. She spots him trying to seduce and possibly rape a fellow coed. Dean knowing what she’s going to do, tries to stop her. But Paige get’s everyone’s attention and lets everyone know how Dean raped her. I don’t know if anyone listened to her though. Outside Paige is yelling at him that he raped her and being a cocky cock, he admits to it while making a really creepy grin that makes it obvious that he’s a rapist. He then starts to say that she must want some more if she keeps coming back to him. Paige now completely insane drives Spinner’s car into his, completely fucking up both vehicles. Spinner see’s the whole thing and yells at her to go home.

We get a quick montage of Paige getting a cab home. Joey being worried about Craig it seems like and then we see Craig arriving at Sean’s place. I didn’t even know they were still friends. They stopped hanging out together back in season 2.

The next day of school, Paige comes in for her weekly counseling session. The Asian teacher tells her that even though she lost her case, she still did the right thing by going to trial. Paige meanwhile is so jaded, you can tell that she’s not even listening to a word she’s saying.

After that, she comes up to Spinner and he asks her if what she did felt good. She says yes. Then goes on to say that she’ll get a job to fix up his junked out car. Just then, Mrs Big Tits tells him that the Mounties are there to speak to him. You can tell it’s serious by the music they’re using. And yup, Spinner is in deep shit because of what Paige did, looking like he wants to cry. Or is he?

We cut to the MI lab where Craig is eating fries and gravy. Ok, I love my Canadian peeps. I really do. But what the fuck is it with you guys and that nasty combo? Just asking. Anyways, it seems like Snake has come there to have a talk with Craig. He mentions the fact that Joey called him last night worried about Craig. Snake called Joey Craig’s dad. Craig still acting like an asshole tells Snake that he doesn’t have a dad.

At her house, Paige get’s a call from Spinner where apparently he’s under arrest. Seems that Dean got his license plate number and reported him. Being the good boyfriend, he takes the fall for Paige, reasoning that she’s been through enough already. At the police station Dean comes to Paige huffing and puffing saying that Spinner is dead. She tells him that she’s the one who actually did it and is there to tell them the truth. Dean then goes on to tell Paige that the frat kicked him out because of what she said. Not liking that she turned her back on him, he yells at her that he’s not finished. But Paige tells him that she is and especially with him.

We cut to Joey where he’s waiting for Craig. Craig comes in and says that he’s just there to get his shit and that he’s moving in with Sean. Joey not having anymore dignity tells him that he’s about to lose his business. Geez, what a surprise that no one wants to buy a used car from Joey’s lot. Seeing the piece of shit that Spinner bought from him, you can tell what kind of inventory Joey has. He mentions that he was wrong to hit Craig up for some money. But you can tell that he still wants Craig to help him out. He goes on to say that his credit is shot and that they’re about a cunt’s hair away from being evicted. Craig now feeling guilty says that he’ll take the guitar back and that he’ll give him the money. Joey tells him to keep it and goes on to say that his big dream is for Craig to go into the used car salesmen business too. You can tell that Craig is mortified at the thought. I know I would be.

The episode ends with Paige telling Spinner that she lost her license and that she’ll probably have a year’s worth of community service. After she makes a few bad jokes, she apologizes to Spinner for busting his car and hurting his feelings. She says that she still wants to pay for the damages and then asks Spinner out on a date.

This was an ok episode. While I know Paige was totally justified with being angry, she just annoyed me. But I swear that the scene between Craig and Snake went longer, with Snake ripping Craig a new asshole over the way he was acting. Am I right or was I just imagining that? This will probably be my only post this month, I usually get very busy in October. I’ll try to squeeze in another episode though.