Degrassi The Next Generation Reviewed

Ah yes, the companion blog to Degrassi Junior High Reviewed. Each episode will be reviewed in order by a guy who loves the next generation's melodrama.

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Season 4, Episode 19, “Moonlight Desires”

In this episode we deal with more of Marco’s relationship troubles. Great, wonderful, grand!

Pre-credit Opener: We open with Marco ordering everyone around like a mother hen. Apparently Caitlin’s public access TV show is coming to Degrassi so Marco wants everything perfect. Alex comes by and tells him that there is no way in hell that she’s wearing the mascot’s costume. Marco starts to go on about how awesome Degrassi is, despite all the school shootings that have happened there. Ellie who seems to be wearing something that Pinhead would be sporting says that Marco should run for president next year. That’s when Marco tells them that he’s thinking of taking extra classes so that he can graduate early and then go to college where he can be clingy with Dylan. Needless to say, the gang doesn’t like this shit, not one bit.

The next day Dylan is dropping off Marco where they’re making plans to meet at a party later on in the evening. Inside the school Caitlin is talking to Mrs Hatzalokos about Rick being killed and Sean being shot. Shit, did that happen this season? It seems so long ago already. But Mrs hotass is patting herself on the back hard for turning things around that she’s in danger of hurting herself. But I don’t see that she did much of anything besides kicking Spinner and Jay out.

Speaking of those two, Jay is being annoying with Spinner while he’s working at the Dot. Spinner seems to be sick of his life. Especially because some old bags are giving him a hard time about the menu. Boy, what a pointless scene, hopefully it’s leading up to something.

Back at Degrassi Marco is supposed to be donating blood for Caitlin’s show but a worker comes by and tells Marco that he can’t donate due to his homosexuality. Which is pretty fucked up, plus she fucked up by saying that to him in Degrassi. We all know that they don’t stand for that shit. Especially when it’s something against the gays.

At Mrs Hatzalokos office Spinner walks in being a major kiss ass, bringing her flowers. But she’s still angry with him and tells him that he shouldn’t be there because he’s been expelled. Spinner being extremely stupid goes on to say that he’s been keeping up with his homework and exams with his text books so he can graduate in time. She coldly tells him that he should have returned the books. Seems that Spinner doesn’t know what expelled means and him taking exams don’t count for shit. Making a concession, she tells him that she’s willing to let him go to Summer school. He starts to complain that it’s not enough for him to graduate and that it’s not fair. Pissed off now, she throw’s in his face that Rick died and that he’s a life ruining idiot. Spinner should have told her that Rick was an asshole and fuck him. But he continues with how he needs to finish his year and she tells him no. In a gangsta move, he throws the flowers into the trash. Take that!

In the next scene Marco is riling up all the Degrassi regulars with the discrimination that’s happening to him. He goes on to tell Alex that he’s the power bottom in his relationship and that he’s only been with Dylan. Alex tells him to stop being a little bitch and to complain to Caitlin. Which is probably the best thing for him to do because Caitlin is the ultimate shit starter. Especially when she doesn’t have all the facts. She’ll find a way to protest something anyways. With the cameras in the nurses face, Marco asks her why they can’t draw his blood. She simply tells him that it’s policy and they can’t risk giving gay to other people. Nah she didn’t say that part, just that it’s policy and that she’s not a spokesperson. Marco makes an even bigger deal about it and that’s when the nurse tells him that in the gay community there’s a big risk of people having HIV. Marco get’s pissed and says that they’re just lumping them all together. Mrs H comes and ends it by telling him to cool his nuts off.

Outside Degrassi Jay is complaining to Spinner that it’s his fault that he’s so bored. Lazy asshole should go out and get a job. Especially since he has nothing better to do. Spinner being rebellious tells him that they should steal from Degrassi. Oh Spinner, you never learn.

At Dylan’s dorm, Marco comes storming in, fuming from being discriminated against. He’s shocked to see that Dylan is making out with some black dude. Well, so much for their relationship. Dylan comes out and tells Marco that they’re just friends. Which is a thing that a cheating girlfriend would say. Marco tells him that they should break up, but it seems that Dylan still wants to be with him, but he also wants to have his chance to experience sex with some Alabama black snake. Marco is a goddamn fool if he agrees to it.

With the girls Marco is complaining about what just happened. Saying that it was humiliating. Especially after what the nurse told him about HIV being higher with the gays. Alex annoyed tells Marco that people being nasty motherfuckers who cheat is a guy thing. Craig being insulted says that Amy was banging every guy there too. That’s when Ellie shuts him up by bringing up that fact that he got Manny pregnant with his deranged love child. Craig not even mad says that they should just say that it’s a people thing. Marco lamely says that he wants his boyfriend back and that’s when Craig comes up with an idea to get Dylan back at the party later on that night.

In the next scene we come upon Spinner and Dylan sneaking into the school. At the party Dylan tells Marco that he’s happy that he came and Craig leaves them alone. You can tell that Marco is conflicted. We cut back to the school where Spinner and Jay are up to some lame antics like throwing toilet paper all over the gym and shooting some hoops. Spinner then piles a bunch of chairs against the main doorway. They’re such rebels.

Back at the party Marco is all excited to see his piece about the blood drive so he puts on the local public access channel to watch. He’s quickly disappointed to see that Caitlin cut out his hissy fit. Man, that brother is extremely gay and he calls Dylan to do some shots with him. Marco being stupid tells him that it’s ok. Marco now hurt wants to make him jealous. Oh the drama with this dude.

At Degrassi Spinner and Jay are going through the year book and Spinner is seriously missing his friends when he see’s his picture amongst the rest of the gang. You would have thought that they wouldn’t have put him in there because of what he did.

We go back to the party and he strikes up a conversation with a Mike. Mike not aware of the bullshit between Marco and Dylan get’s all happy when Marco tells him that he’d like to see his room. Man, Marco’s gaydar sure has improved. Meanwhile, Dylan seems like he doesn’t give a shit.

It seems like Spinner hasn’t learned a fucking thing and wants to set all the yearbooks on fire. Jay for once showing more sense stops him and mentions that they’ll end up in jail for arson. This then starts a fight and with Jay asking Spinner if he wants his friends to suffer more. Spinner then blurts out that he wants them back. Jay says that that’s not the way to do it. Jay’s being very mature in this episode, case in point, he tells him that they need to clean the mess that they made. This is what you call character development folks.

In a stair well Craig is trying to give Marco a pep talk by saying how great he is. Marco tells him that he should say that he’s an idiot. Craig of course obliges. Marco goes on to say that he can’t go downstairs and he can’t go to Dylan. That’s when Dylan walks in and Marco gives Craig a smooch. I don’t know if Craig is surprised or if he’s going to murder him. Can’t tell with Craig. Anyways, Dylan leaves in a huff and Craig clearly disgusted yells at Marco. You can tell that Craig is going to use a lot of mouth wash when he get’s home.

Finally these two have a serious talk and Marco tells him that he loves him but things are pretty fucked up between the two of them. Marco admits that he doesn’t want him to see other people and Dylan can’t help making an oh God face. Marco goes on to say that he doesn’t like it and Dylan tries to tell him how to feel by saying that he shouldn’t be bothered because he still loves him and therefore it makes him blameless. Dylan goes on to say that he wants to fuck around and his freedom is too important for him. Marco having some dignity breaks up with him.

Spinner returns to see Mrs H and she’s still giving him the cold shoulder. He pretty much tries to make all sorts of deals to come back to Degrassi next fall. He tells her that he wants to finish school and get his friends back. Being all stern she gives him some forms and that Summer school is going to be his second chance and not to fuck up again. She also mentions that he needs to not have such a goofy haircut next year.

The episode ends with Marco meeting Caitlin at her station. He’s still wondering why his segment didn’t air. Lord he can’t let things go. Caitlin tells him that some people there didn’t want it to air. Crusader Caitlin then comes out and says that she’s pissed about it too and that it’s not fair that Homosexuals are still being seen as having a higher risk of Aids. That’s when she tells him that he can go around to either Africa or the Caribbean to educate people about HIV. Marco now happier than a pig in shit tells her that he has nothing to do that Summer and he’d love to do it.

So this was an alright episode. Kind of cliche with the boyfriend in college wanting to see other people angle. It’s not like we’ve seen that happen before. But at least Marco had the common sense to dump his ass. And it’s obvious that they’re setting up Spinner making his triumphant return to Degrassi in the Fall. We only have one more episode to go to finish this season and it’s a doozy. Silent Bob himself Kevin Smith and Jay are guest starring in it. Pretty random I know.


Season 4, Episode 18, “Modern Love”

Hey there Degrassi fans. I’m sure some of you regular readers have noticed that I’ve been really irregular with posting more reviews. The honest truth is that I lose interest, get interested again after a few months and then quickly lose interest again. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that a lot of episodes in this season have sucked ass. But I’m trying to motivate myself into posting more reviews in May, as in, may I please fucking complete this season already? I may fail in this goal because reading the episode description I can tell that this episode is going to also suck and I’ve been writing this review for a few days already. But you know what? We didn’t come this far to just take a shit and then eat it, we’re finishing this bitch.

Pre-Credit Opener: Paige and her pedo boyfriend are out having a romantic picnic and she’s going on about how a good student teacher he is. He’s going on about how scared he is of his class because the next day he’s going to be graded on how well they respond to him. She tells him not to worry about Marco and Heather St Claire because he’s nothing but a little bitch and so is she. They start to make fun of this dad who has no hair on his legs and holy shit, turns out that it’s Snake taking his baby out for a stroll. Paige puts on her shades and her stupid pink cowboy hat to disguise herself. But I think it only brings more attention towards them. She thinks the coast is clear, but it kind of seems like Snake spotted them anyways. Fingers crossed that this is the end of their relationship in this episode, because this stupid bullshit has gotten old fast.

In the next scene Paige isn’t there to lead the cheer squad again, so Manny takes it upon herself to take over. Hazel can’t help telling her that she doesn’t like that at all. Manny with a huge nasty zit on her forehead tells Hazel that Paige doesn’t give a mother fuck because she’s too busy with Matt. Hazel blows it off as it being just a student teacher thing, and that’s when stupid Manny let’s on that Paige and him are linked romantically. Going by her facial expression, Hazel is hurt on not finding out this information from Paige directly.

In the MI lab Mr Wonderful is teaching Emma’s class and they’re having a discussion about Cigarettes that are being geared towards woman. Matt tries to engage even more with Emma and asks her where she thinks the woman in the ad is going. Chris mumbles that she’s probably going to the ravine. Pow! If you remember Emma was sucking Jay’s dick a couple of episodes ago and got and STD I think. Matt tells him to shut his mouth and Snake looks at Chris like he’s going to do something. But Snake is a giant pussy as we all know and isn’t going to do a goddamn thing about it. Emma then starts to name all the stuff the chick will get if she continues smoking. Mumble mouth then says, “Gonorrhea.” Matt now angry tells him that he’ll see him after class. I think Chris is just jealous because she never got on his Alabama black snake.

Apparently now it’s Paige’s class being taught by her boyfriend. Hazel is trying to get her attention, but Paige being in love wants her to shut up so she can listen to him. Hazel won’t be stopped though, she asks Paige if Manny is her new bestfriend. Paige doesn’t know what she’s talking about and that’s when Hazel throws Manny under the bus and lets her know that she told her about their relationship. This of course only get’s her in trouble again and Matt asks her if she has a problem. Hazel being full of sass tells him that she thought that he only had eyes for Paige. Everyone starts whispering and Matt is at a loss for words. So much so that he can’t teach anymore. Which only shows how guilty he is.

Outside the school Manny asks Emma what’s wrong and Emma is so angry she’s trying to kill that mumbling fuck with her mind. Manny and the other girls tell her not to let guys get to her. That’s when Chester comes along and acts all obnoxious with them. After he picks at her food, Darcy thinks that he’s the cat’s meow. To cheer Emma up, Manny proposes that they have a girls only spa weekend. By the way, there’s a new black chick there and I can’t think of her name, but she’ll be joining the cast in later seasons.

In the back of the school Matt is all frazzled now that Hazel fucked with him that way. Paige promises that it’ll never happen again. But Matt is clearly freaking out and says, “I don’t want to be booted out of teacher’s college!” I can’t help but think, it’s not just college? There’s a teacher’s college in Canada? Anyways, Paige vows that that won’t happen, but we all know that Matt is going to be boned by his relationship with her.

In the hallway Manny tells Paige to have a good weekend. But Paige is severely annoyed at Manny, simply ignores her. Pissing Manny off now. Paige now angry asks why she opened her big mouth with Hazel. Manny says that she thought that she knew already. They have more angry words, with Paige calls her a boy crazy whore and that’s when Manny kicks her right in the kiester. Paige then slaps the shit out of her and we have a full blown cat fight on our hands. Mrs Hatzilakos and Matt come and break it up with Matt telling Manny to calm the fuck down. That’s when Manny decides to be a life ruining bitch and calls him a pedophile and tells everyone about their relationship. Right away Mrs Hotass takes Paige and Matt into her office.

Outside her office Paige is telling Marco that everyone is going to hate her if she ends up being the reason that he get’s fired. I love how she’s only thinking about what people are going to think of her. I mean, fuck his career or his life. Marco once again being a girl tells her that it wasn’t her fault, because she was in love. But please, this was just puppy love right here and he took advantage of her because he wanted some teenage poon.

Matt walks out of the office and Mrs Hotass calls her in. Paige immediately starts to go off on Manny, calling her a lying cunt. Mrs Hotass asks her if they have a relationship going on and Paige of course denies it. Only a fool would admit that. She then says that she wants to have Snake, Matt’s teacher adviser and her parents at a meeting to discuss this situation. Ha. This finally has gotten better. Paige get’s her heartbroken because Matt told Mrs Hatzilakos that Paige is a fucking psychopath who’s obsessed with him and has been a stalker for months. I gotta say, it’s kind of true.

It’s time for Emma’s relaxing spa weekend at home and the girls are outside with shit on their faces. Emma for the time being is being a huge man hater and is appreciating the time she’s having with the girls. It’s short lived because apparently Chester is Emma’s neighbor and Darcy and the black chick who just showed up are excited and embarrassed that he’s there because they like him for some reason.

Back at the rat’s nest that’s Matt’s apartment, Paige comes up banging on the door like she’s the damn police. She barges in and want’s to know why he fucked her over. He tells her that he can’t get caught because his life will be over. He wants them to wait until Summer where he’ll be free to ravage her sexually whenever he wants. But Paige has the fury of a woman scorned and doesn’t want to hear this shit. Especially since she’s the one coming off as an unstable stalker. After some more back and forth between these two he simply says, “My entire future is on the line.” Meaning, go along with it you stupid little bitch.

You know, every episode has to have a stupid, boring, or unfunny story line going on and this with Emma and her friends is it. You guys pick which category it falls under. The girls are all outside in the world’s smallest front yard tie dyeing shirts. Why they couldn’t be in their backyard is beyond me. Manny of course seems to be just wearing a man’s shirt and nothing else. That’s when Chester and his other goofy looking brother’s come out of their house and start to play catch. Manny and the girls are pretty moist by spotting this trio and Manny instantly transforms herself into super skank. It’s fucking incredible how this happened. Turns out that Chester’s brother’s are as big as dickheads as he is and one of them throws the football at Emma and all this dye splashes all over her. This starts a massively lame feud between them.

At the movie theater Alex is telling Paige what a piece of shit Matt is for fucking her over. But Paige is still being pathetic and let’s Alex know that she misses him already. Dylan comes by fuming, demanding to know where Matt is so he can fuck him up. Marco meanwhile looks like he’s all scared by his machismo. Paige being an idiot is still defending him to Dylan and just makes herself look really dumb. But hey, what do you expect from a teenage girl? She doesn’t know any better.

Emma and the girls are still feuding with Chester and they do a stupid prank with a Christmas tree and femine products for ornaments. Before she can put the star on she get’s caught by the police. Thank God that shit is over with, seriously it wasn’t funny and it was clearly just to take up room in this episode.

Paige once again shows her stupidity by telling Matt that she’s willing to go along with his story and pretty much blames herself for losing her temper with Manny. She goes on to say not to worry because there’s no strings attached and she just leaves. Matt’s probably dancing for joy because he got her to go along.

At Degrassi Paige is telling everyone that she was being a loser stalker and she doesn’t want to cause anymore trouble, so she would like to transfer out of his class, effective immediately. Snake all full of piss and vinegar tells her that she’ll fail the class because there aren’t anymore MI classes to take and it’ll affect her getting into college. Paige still being a moron says that she’s willing to transfer schools but Mrs H tells her that she’ll probably lose her year because it’s so close to the end of the school year. Snake asks her if she’s really thinking everything through. Man everyone is on her case here. But oh shit. Now we know why Snake is so pissed off for. He goes off on Matt and says that he trusted him with his kids. Mrs Hotass asks him what the fuck he’s talking about. He then tells Mrs Hatzilakos that he saw something between them, but won’t say what. Goddamn it Snake! Once again, you’re a big pussy. Paige now in tears just wants the matter closed and is willing to fail. But Matt can’t take it anymore and admits that they had a relationship going on, seeing each other outside of school. Probably porking her too.

Outside her house Emma tells Chester that she only got a warning from the police. Turns out that Chester’s brother’s are named Chuck and Chad. Jesus Degrassi, can you get anymore ludicrous? Anyways, it’s obvious that Chester likes her and is going to protect her from his idiot brothers.

Finally it’s the end of the episode and Matt tells Paige that he can stay in the aid program, but teacher’s college is done. I’m surprised they let him stay at the school after that shit. Paige acts all shocked and tries to make things right, but Matt knows that his career is over. Strange that he rejoices in the fact that he can now be seen in public with Paige. This motherfucker has no shame and is glad to still have his teenage girlfriend. I would say he’s indifferent about not being able to molest future students.

So it’s about time that we got a more interesting episode. Too bad Paige hasn’t learned her lesson. Actually there were hardly any consequences for Matt except being kicked out of “Teacher’s College.” You would have thought that they would have brought charges on his ass for banging a minor. But no, he got away with it Scott free. I’m not even going to mention Emma’s plot, that shit stunk so bad we smelled it all the way down here in the states from Toronto.


Season 4, Episode 17, “Queen Of Hearts”

So I’m back all you Degrassi maniacs. Happy New Years. Yeah, I know it’s February but better late than never right? Reading what this episode is about, I’m already bored and annoyed. Hopefully it’s not as bad as I think it is.

Pre-credit Intro: We open with Ellie living like a slob in Sean’s pad with her army of rodents. She hears a knock on the door and a guy who apparently has no hair on his body is telling her that it’s the end of the month and the rent is due. She tells him that she knows and that she’ll write him a check. He mentions that she was late with the rent last month and doesn’t believe her bullshit excuses anymore. He then notices that the lamp seems to be flickering and she lets it out that it’s her pet ferret, but apparently it chewed through the cable and killed itself. Pretty clear it chose suicide than to keep living with Ellie.

Outside the school Ellie is telling the gang what happened to her ferret. Alex is the only one who seems amused by this news. Ellie goes on to say that she’s been pretty down since Sean left and seems to be more lonely than usual. Marco throwing her some pity tells her that he’ll be there after school so that they could have a rat funeral but she mentions that she’ll be having dinner with her mom that evening. Seems that she’s only seeing her mom to get rent money. That’s pretty fucked up.

I forgot all about Paige and her relationship with the student teacher. Right away she get’s annoyed with him because he calls on Hazel instead of her in class. So of course she just has to confront him on it. But I guess it’s not a big deal. Ok. She goes on to ask him out on a date to the movies that night. Manny comes along and tells her that the new uniforms are in. It’s awkward as hell because Manny just happened to see him pawing at Paige during the last school dance.

It’s dinner time and it’s as tense as it can get between Ellie and her mom. I love how Ellie is being a bitch to her even though she’s giving her money to live on her own, which she really can’t do. Her mom asks her how she is and is proud of her for being independent. She goes on to say that she hasn’t had a drink since she left and wants her to come home because she misses her. Ellie of course is being difficult and tells her that she doesn’t need her anymore or her money. Shit, I can tell that her mom is going to go on a huge binge because of that. Nice going Ellie.

In the next scene Marco and Ellie are giving her ferret a funeral and yeah, I could careless.

At the Degrassi mall Paige is just meeting up with her pedo boyfriend and that’s when the manager of the movie theater tells her that everyone is sick and she’s going to have to work. He stops her from getting herself fired and tells her to go to work. Paige of course can’t help rolling her eyes.

Back at Ellie’s, Ellie is obviously distraught because she’s a lonely loser. Marco then asks her if she wants to go play poker with Dylan’s hockey team. He pretty much let’s on that it’s easy money because they’re a bunch of stupid meat head jocks. We then start to hear the theme song from the Hustler and I’m surprised that they could have afforded the music rights to that. The next day Marco and Ellie are now playing poker with Craig , Jimmy and Alex and Jesus Christ I’m so bored with this episode already.

In class her boyfriend calls on her to define what lying means and he gives her a note in front of everyone. This guy has no shame as he’s making out with her down in the boiler room. Having enough she tells him that she wants to come over to his place because she wants to know how he lives. He gives the impression that he’s embarrassed at how poor he is because he’s just a student teacher, but I think it’s because he doesn’t want anyone to know that he’s going out with a high school girl. He tells her no and we all know that Paige hates it when she doesn’t get her way.

Down in the Degrassi basement, Ellie and the gang are still playing poker and I guess Ellie is now a poker winning champion. Feeling full of herself, she wants her and Alex to play with Dylan’s hockey team.

In the gym Manny mentions that Mr O is good looking and Paige agree’s even mentioning his hot bulge. Paige confesses that she doesn’t like the fact that he’s trying to keep her a secret even though she full well knows that he would get into deep shit if anyone found out that he was messing around with her, but Paige is selfish and wants her way. Manny makes things worse by saying that there’s not a lot of honesty going on with the two of them and she’s surprised that he doesn’t have a girlfriend. Paige mentions that he did but they split. Manny then says, “That’s what he told you.” So yeah, that’s now inside Paige’s head.

So it seems like the big poker party is at Ellie’s place, but it’s a shame that she and Alex can’t get into the game because Dylan’s team play for big money. That’s when stupid Ellie decides to use the rent money that her mom gave her. Shit, everyone can see a mile away how this is going to turn out. I gotta point out how girly Marco looks by serving everyone deserts from a tray.

Anyways, we then get a montage of the poker marathon and Ellie is going through high’s and lows as they either win or lose. Alex then convinces her to use all the money that she has so they can continue to play. Ellie feeling good about everything asks Alex to move in with her. Alex loves the idea because she has such a shitty home life, but she can’t afford to move out. Ellie again goes off on her mom saying how horrible she is for almost burning the house down when she was drunk. Alex then points out that at least her mom sobered up and is paying her rent. She should be so lucky since her own mom is a piece of shit.

At the mall Paige is calling customer service about her phone not working. Yeah, they point out that it’s fine since she’s talking to them on it. Paige is obviously having a melt down because Mr Wonderful hasn’t called her all night. Shit you know it’s bad when even her manager thinks that she’s being played for a fool and getting cheated on.

Seems like Ellie and Alex are a point away from losing the game, but Alex is confident that they’ll win with the hand that she has and she tells Ellie to go for it with her rent money. Alex tells her to sit her ass down and holy shit, they actually won. Alex leaves all disgusted at Ellie for not having any faith in her. I don’t blame Ellie because I sure as hell didn’t think they were going to win.

Paige now completely out of her mind goes to her boyfriend’s apartment and is demanding to know why he hasn’t been calling her all night. She barges in and the place is a real shit hole with water leaking from the ceiling. She feels bad because he’s been battling the fight against dirty shit water coming down into his apartment. She’s finely happy though because he says that they’re in a relationship and she tells him that she’s staying.

We end the episode with Ellie and her mom having a heart to heart discussion. She calls her mom over and lets her know that she’s written a letter to the land lord giving him a two month’s notice. But before she moves in she wants to make sure that her mom has stopped drinking for good. All her mom says that she can do is that she can try as it’s a day to day thing. With that Ellie finally decides to go home.

So fuck, this episode sucked so bad. It was obviously just a filler episode with nothing really happening. So Ellie decided to go back home, whoopie fucking doo. Who cares? The whole Paige storyline is boring as hell too and they’re dragging it out because everyone can see that it’s not going to end well. If I graded these episodes this one would definitely get an F minus. I feel like my time was wasted and I’ll never get it back watching this stinker.


Season 4, Episode 12, “Voices Carry, Part 2”

We continue Craig’s decent into madness with the conclusion of a not so great two part episode. Yeah that’s right, I said it. It fucking sucks!

Pre-Credit Opener: So it seems like Craig’s crazy ass has finally calmed down and he’s just sitting in his wreaked motel room spinning around his dead mom’s wedding ring on a table when the phone rings. Of course it’s Ashley and she says that she was trying to call him all night but he wasn’t picking up. Yeah, that’s because he had completely blacked out and was doing an all night rampage in his room. They have some small talk and that’s when stupid Ashley says that she doesn’t want to marry him now. She does want to marry him in the future though. Craig being depressed one second is now elated that she said that and his mood is now one of pure joy. What an asshole.

At the Dot Craig once again is looking hyper as hell when Marco walks in and Craig starts to say that he acted like an idiot. Marco knows all this already and wants to know what’s the matter with him. Craig tells him about Ashley and going to her gay dad’s wedding. I love how he called Marco because he wants help with shopping for a new expensive suit. Marco should be pissed off that he called him for that exact reason, but I think he loves shopping so much, he doesn’t give a shit.

Seems like Craig is going shopping using Joey’s gold credit card, I have no idea how Joey can even afford to have a credit card since he never ever has any money. Or perhaps, that’s why he’s in such deep shit all the time. During this whole montage Craig is picking out clothes that would make him look like a fucking clown. So good thing that Marco is there to shoot down all his horrible choices. After all that it’s obvious that he ran up a huge bill, but it looks like he just got the same suit that he wore in the previous episode.

Oh god!! I forgot about Liberty and Jt’s stupid ass subplot about the Degrassi school musical. They tell everyone about the Raditch song and they love it, but Manny and the rest of the drama club don’t want to sing it because they know that they’ll get into deep shit.

At the hotel elevator Craig is boring some poor east Indian guy to death with Ashley and her dad’s wedding. You can tell the guy just wants the doors to open so that he can get away from this yapping crazy fuck he’s stuck with. Mercifully the doors open and Craig get’s out, but that’s when he see’s the hotel security and staff looking at his destroyed room. Craig quickly get’s back in to hide from them.

Poor Jimmy is sort of enjoying his horrible hospital food when Craig bursts through the damn door and demands to use his bathroom so that he can change into his suit. He starts to change and Jimmy looks away because he doesn’t want to look at his wang. Craig meanwhile is telling him all about Ashley and him getting married. Jimmy tells him that he has time for that, and that’s when he says that Ashley said yes. Which is not the truth by far. Jimmy points out that he’s sixteen and maybe he should wait until he graduates and get’s a job. All Craig does is completely ignore him and asks him for help with his cuff link. Jimmy now seeing how deranged he’s acting asks him if he’s drunk or high as fuck. Craig just shouts, “I LOVE HER!” Jimmy should have told him, “I don’t have time for this Mickey Mouse bullshit, get out of my room.”

Finally it’s time for gay wedding and everyone there is as happy as can be. Craig meanwhile is there and he’s twitching away like a motherfucker. Ashley meanwhile doesn’t seem to notice it and mouths I love you to him.

Back at Joey’s house, Joey has finally noticed that his credit card is missing and he asks Caitlin if she can pay for the Chinese food. Something tells me that he asks her for help paying for shit alot. Spike and Snake are there helping and she pays for the food because she fees bad for him. Joey mentions that he thinks that Craig probably stole it. Snake makes a face and asks him how he’s been doing lately. Snake tells him that he’s a bit concerned about him because he’s acting a bit unstable. Joey not wanting to believe that Craig has something wrong with him just blows him off. But uh oh, the hotel has now called his house and they tell him about how Craig fucked up the hotel room and he’s now stuck with a huge bill. I guess he believes him now.

At the wedding Ashley’s mom is giving a toast to the two newlyweds. She mentions that their family might be unusual, but that they’re awesome or something. At that she asks Ashley to stand up and she does so slightly embarrassed. As she sits down Craig’s crazy ass stands up and she tries to get him to sit down, but he says he has something to say. And yeah, he tells everyone that he and Ashley are getting married and she’s beyond mortified. Her mom is pissed and everyone else just feels awkward as hell.

In the next scene Ashley is asking him what he was thinking by doing that shit. Craig starts to ramble on about how she told him that she would want to get married to him eventually and he didn’t see anything wrong with him telling everyone, so he’s blameless. Ashley then tells him that she’s changed her mind and she wants him to leave. Craig of course acts like a lunatic and get’s on his knees, declaring his love for her. Having enough, she tells him to go home. Craig says he will, but first he needs to cause a scene. He goes up to Ashley’s mom and two dad’s and tells them that he needs to talk to them. All he does is start to ramble again and that’s when Ashley’s dad’s husband starts to drag his ass out and they get into a tussle. Craig falls onto a table and he goes through it like Chris Farley used to.

Way to grind the episode to a fucking halt Degrassi writers. It’s time for Liberty and JT’s song and of course they piss Mr Raditch off. That’s exactly what they do and he gives them both detention. This is so stupid and not necessary I’m not even going into detail with it because there was more.

Craig meanwhile has really gone into the deep end and is crying like crazy saying that he needs Ashley. Seriously, he looks so demented he’s making me laugh. Since he’s totally wacked out of his mind he decides to pick a fight with the phone booth and he loses that one as well.

He finally makes his way to Joey’s house where Caitlin tells him that Joey’s not there because he’s out looking for him. She see’s that his hand is bleeding and she’s going to go and get something for it. Angela tells him that Joey’s super pissed, Craig not caring tells her that she needs to give Ashley his dead mom’s wedding ring and he goes up to his room.

Back at the wedding Joey comes by looking for Craig and pretty much starts accusing Craig and Ashley of stealing his credit card and booking a hotel room with it. Ashley get’s embarrassed because her mom hears all this and she’s just sickened because she knows that Craig’s nasty ass just banged her daughter. Joey then asks her why they had to trash it for and it’s going to cost him $4,000 dollars in damages. Ashley surprised says that she didn’t and quickly figures out that Craig did he because he had a huge meltdown the previous night when she turned down his marriage proposal. Ashley’s mom now pissed off tells Joey that Craig has a lot of problems and that’s when Ashley defends him because she’s stupid. Joey meanwhile is in despair wondering what’s going on with Craig.

At Joey’s Craig comes down the stairs and tells Caitlin that she should give Joey an envelope. Caitlin mentions that they know that he stole the credit card. He get’s all pissed off and says that it’s about $3,000 dollars and the credit card is there too. She asks him where he’s going and he says back to the wedding. But shit, Joey’s home and he’s fuming. Craig tries to leave and Joey tells him that he’s not going anywhere because something isn’t right with him. Craig once again acts like a maniac and Joey has to push him back so he can sit down. Craig hulks out in anger and pushes Joey around like a rag doll and then proceeds to kick the shit out of Joey’s ass. Goddamn Joey, even a teenage kid can beat your ass. This is like the third or fourth fight he’s lost since the original series. Ashley walks in and puts a stop to Craig’s rage. Immediately he calms down, shit that’s just like the Black Widow and the Hulk right here. Ashley tells him that he needs help and that’s when he seems to notice that Joey’s been beaten to a pulp. Joey you truly are a bald loser! Pathetic I swear!

At detention JT and Liberty are there and they have a kiss that’s so nauseating. Where did that come from? JT only hated her since the show debuted. He must have zero standards. That or I guess he figured that all he has is Toby, Johnny Mathis, and his hand. So I guess Liberty wins. But apparently they’re a couple now.

At the hospital Craig is telling Ashley that he still can’t sleep and that he’s crazy. Ashley says that he’s not crazy, he’s bi polar. So that explains all the erratic behavior. Craig tells Ashley that maybe she should go, and goes on to say that he’ll be dealing with the condition for the rest of his life. The episode ends with Ashley saying that she’s not leaving and that they’re still a couple.

So ok, this episode was a bit better than the previous one. I still find it hilarious that Joey got his ass kicked by his teenage stepson. So Craig’s bi polar, he’s still an chode though. As for Liberty and JT, who cares. Who would have thought that there’d be a worse couple than Craig and Ashley. You really out did yourself in this one Degrassi.



Season 4, Episode 11, “Voices Carry, Part 1”

So the Craig and Ashley saga continues. Again, I have to say, who cares and I hate it that this one is a two parter. The writers just seem to enjoy torturing everyone with their bullshit romance.

Pre-Credit Opener: We see Craig and Ashley smooching in front of the school. After some dumb small talk it seems like Ashley doesn’t want her mom to see that she’s with Craig. I guess she hates his guts because he broke her daughters heart when he was banging Manny like a jack rabbit. She goes on to say that she’s been very busy with her dad’s upcoming wedding. Uh oh, Ashley’s mom pulls up and it’s clear that she wants to cut his balls off. Craig tells Ashley that he’ll call her later that night, but her mom tells him not to bother.

In the hallway Ashley is rehearsing what she’s going to tell her mom that Craig is back in the picture. Craig meanwhile is just focusing on the fact that her mom told him to not bother calling her. Craig is a classic narcissistic person. Suddenly we hear an according playing and it’s obvious that it’s Marco, but shit, now he’s singing Craig’s shitty song pretty badly. Turns out that they’re listening to a CD of their recording and Spinner tells him that that’s the finished product because he abandoned them for Yoko, I mean Ashley. He then pours out all the CD’s onto Craig’s feet and Marco tells him that it’s the one and only single that their band will ever put out. So it’s obvious that they’re still pissed. But Ashley tells Craig that she can careless because she’s back with him and that’s all that counts. That just goes to show how selfish she is too.

Oh great, so the subplot involves Liberty and the fact that she wrote a play. I already wish this episode was over with. She goes on to say that she doesn’t want to deal with it, but Manny tries to encourage her. No one should ever encourage Liberty. They go on to say that she adapted Dracula from the actual novel. She tries to sound all sophisticated with how she’s talking, but all it does is annoy the shit out of me. JT goes on to say that she’s brilliant and then mentions that he’s the director. Why would anyone let an immature dickhead like JT direct a play is beyond me.

In the MI lab Craig and Ashley are IMing each other and that’s when Craig shows her the lyrics to a new shitty song. Snake tells them to go back to work, but Craig is starting to act like a fucking maniac and is completely ignoring Snake. It’s easy to ignore Snake because who takes him seriously as an authority figure. After the third time of ignoring him, Snake tells him to take the computer in the corner. Craig starts to have a meltdown over being reprimanded and Ashley seems to be embarrassed for him, or maybe herself? It could be her. Anyways, Craig tells Snake to go fuck himself and storms out the door. Snake now completely defeated tells him to go to the office, but it’s obvious that he’s not. I know I wouldn’t listen to him.

Out in the hall way Ashley is asking him if he’s calmed down and he starts to go on about everyone trying to separate them. She tells him to chill the fuck out since they were talking in class. Ok, Craig is clearly insane, he get’s short with her and asks her who’s side is she on and then demands that she convince her mom that he’s not an asshole even though he is. She suggests that maybe they should tell her parents until after the wedding. Craig acting like a little bitch says that she doesn’t want him there.

In the next scene it seems like Manny is playing Mina while Alex I don’t know which character she is, but she’s in the drama club too. Who would have thought. Manny probably wants to make it like Bram Stoker’s Dracula and show her tits to the crowd. Mr Raditch meanwhile has called Liberty and JT aside and he has a big problem with the play because it has severed heads, stakes through the heart. You know, classic Vampire stuff. He’s overreacting because of what Rick did, she counters that by saying that she wrote the play to give everyone hope. Raditch sounding like a dictator wants them to have a musical about Degrassi and how awesome it is to go there. Even though a lot of tragedy has been associated with it since the original show.

In the hospital we see Jimmy listening to one of his mixtapes while he’s trying to do some exercises in bed. Craig then barges in wanting help on what to do with Ashley. Jimmy suddenly throws the bar away in frustration and Craig is barely realizing that all he does is complain about himself and his stupid bullshit problems. Jimmy meanwhile can’t even fucking walk anymore so he has bigger fish to fry. But it seems like he prefers that Craig talk about himself because everyone else tries to act like everything is ok. Jimmy suggests that he get her alone to talk to her. He says that he can’t because she’s busy with her dad’s stupid wedding while Caitlin is having their place painted. He then get’s the brilliant idea of booking a hotel room.

Going on with that insanity, he goes over to Joey’s and asks him for money. What a surprise, Joey says that he’s broke. Craig, Joey never has money because he’s a broke dick loser. Craig tells him that he has the money to pay him back, he just needs his credit card for one night only. Joey then mentions that the school called about him skipping out, but he just blows it off. Joey being fair, but firm tells him that he’s not lending him his card. So what does Craig do? Yup, he steals it.

At the wedding site Craig meets Ashley’s new aunt, some bimbo looking chick with a baby girl voice. She then starts to flirt with him, but he tells her that he already hurt Ashley once and no matter what, he won’t do it again. Ashley meanwhile is behind him listening and she’s elated to hear that. He quickly tells her that he got a room for the night and that she can go there after the wedding. Ashley’s mom then comes along and tells her that she made it clear that there’s no more room for other people. Especially greasy haired cheaters like Craig.

Afterwards he takes her to the motel room and Craig is one cheesy motherfucker. He has rose pedals on the floor in the shape of a heart with their initials in it. Ashley’s emo heart is beyond happy and she tells him that it’s perfect. She notices that he got a room with two beds but if he wants they can totally fuck and just share one bed. She says this while spreading her legs open. Woah Ashley! I never thought you had it in you! But the catch being that he wears a rubber. He goes into the drawer and takes out a whole package full of them. Glad to see he learned his lesson after he porked Manny and got her pregnant.

Good lord it seems like they boned their brains out because there’s clothes all over the place. Ashley meanwhile is getting dressed and crying uncontrollably. Craig instantly panics and apologizes if he did something wrong. Just like Caitlin in School’s Out, Ashley is crying tears of joy because she let Craig’s nasty ass break her little kitty in. She tells him to keep talking because he’s just been rambling this whole time and he fucks things up by saying that they should just take off and get an apartment together. Ashley tells him that she has to go because of her dad’s rehearsal dinner and he starts to act possessive. Ashley being stupid doesn’t seem to notice because she’s so “happy”. She then makes the mistake of saying that he’s as important to her as her dad and tells him to get dressed because he’s coming with her.

The episode once again comes to a screeching halt with Liberty’s boring subplot. Manny comes along to the Dot and that’s where Liberty and JT tell her that they’re now working on Degrassi the musical. Manny is beyond mortified at the thought and JT says that he quits and leaves in a huff. Manny pretty much tells her to go and seduce JT at her dad’s hot tub.

So it seems like the rehearsal dinner is at a gay bar. What the fuck? Those wacky Canadians again. Nah, I won’t say that because it’s not right. That’s Degrassi for you. Ashley walks in with Craig and it seems like his mom is ready to murder him, but all she says is that she needs a moment alone with Ashley. Ashley being stupid says that if she has something to say, she can say it in front of Craig. Craig out of his mind tells her that it’s ok and they should go have a talk. They start to talk and Ashley points out that not only did her dad leave her, he left her for another man and now she’s throwing him a goddamn wedding. So if she can forgive him, then she can forgive Craig.

Later on it seems like Toby is dancing with Ashley’s mom because not even a gay dude would want to dance with a toad like him. He see’s Ashley’s aunt Sally passing by and tries to talk to her, but she ignores him like everyone else does. Craig all of a sudden tells her that he has to leave for a bit, but that he’s coming back. Back at Joey’s he’s singing his stupid song he wrote about her and is digging out a packet out of an old shoe box.

He comes down in a suit and that’s when Joey asks him if everything is ok because he seems hyper as fuck. He tells them that he and Ashley are back together and he must have been out of his mind that he cheated on her with Manny. I love how he doesn’t remember that it was because Ashley wasn’t putting out and Manny spread those legs faster than could be believed.

Back at the gay bar Ashley notices that he’s come back in a suit and is wondering what’s up. He takes her aside and the crazy motherfucker is actually asking her to marry him. Ashley being freaked out tells him no. Craig immediately starts to lose his shit and starts to act like a maniac again. Ashley just stares at him and he leaves in a huff.

Oh lord we cut to Liberty and JT at her hot tub for some reason. They talk about more stupid ideas for the musical and one of the songs is sticking it to Mr Raditch.

Once again we go back to the gay bar and Ashley’s whorish looking new aunt wants to know what happened with Craig. She tells her that she doesn’t know if they’re still together but he asked her to marry him. The aunt is all surprised and wants to know what Ashley said, man, she’s nosy Ashley tells her that she said no and the aunt says, “But I thought you loved him?” Yeah, clearly she should not take any advice from this chick if she thinks Ashley getting married at such a young age is to be even considered.

The episode ends with Craig having the mother of all meltdowns. The room is a complete wreck, everything is broken including the TV. Joey is so fucked here, it’s even funnier because he probably can’t even pay for it. He’ll probably have to get Caitlin to foot the bill.

So I have to say, this episode was pretty meh for me. The meltdown was awesome, but shit, I can careless about Craig and Ashley’s relationship. I know they have their fans, I have no idea why, but they do. Don’t get me started on Liberty and her stupid play. I was hoping that she was being phased out of the show because we’ve hardly seen her this season, but there she is, boring everyone to death with her bland and lameness.


Season 4, Episode 10, “Neutron Dance”

And we’re back for another episode review of Degrassi. This one deals with Craig and Ashley’s relationship again. I don’t know about you guys, but I could careless because Ashley is still a boring character and so is their relationship.

Pre-Credit Opener: Seems like Craig and the boys are still playing Reggae for some inexplicable reason. I could tell you now, that shit sucks ok. I guess it’s not just the boys, Ashley seems to have joined the band and it’s obvious that the guys don’t want her there. That’s probably why they’re playing Reggae to begin with.

In the MI lab Paige is going off to Snake because some asshole left gum on her chair. Snake being a little annoyed tells her to just find another chair and to stop her yapping. Hazel tells Paige that she should join yoga after school because it’s really helped her deal with Jimmy getting blasted and being turned into a cripple. Paige turns her down at first, but since the new student teacher Mr Olyeander is going to be there, she will too. I guess she didn’t learn her lesson from messing around with older guys.

We cut to the hospital where Craig is complaining to Jimmy about the fact that he thought that Spinner was going to walk out of their band practice. Jimmy should have told him, “I’m crippled you fool!” But all he says is that Spinner walks out on a lot of things. Craig and his greasy 70’s hair then says that Ashley has been there at practice and Jimmy get’s wise to them. Craig denies that there’s anything going on, but Jimmy doesn’t buy it one bit.

Oh lord so the student teacher is teaching the yoga class and both Marco and Paige are staring at his ass. Marco whispers to her, “Check out his hot bulge too.” He comes along and helps Paige with her technique and she practically has an orgasm right then and there. After that Paige tells Hazel that he was flirting with her, Hazel thinks that she’s insane and that he’s just the teacher.

Back in Craig’s garage the band is still arguing over the direction their band should go. Craig is singing some lyrics and even Marco thinks that they’re fucking gay. He mentions that he thought that it was a rock band and the lyrics sound soft. Craig being an “artist” says that they need to change and not stay the same. Spinner decides to come by and brings his skank Manny along too. You can tell that both Craig and Ashley are annoyed that she’s there. Hey she was the reason that they broke up because she got pregnant with Craig’s love child. Craig asks Spinner what Manny is doing there and being a dickhead he says that if Ashley is there, so could Manny.

At the movie theater Paige is bothering Alex about Mr O and if she has a chance of boning him. Just then he comes walking on by and says hello. But wow, he says that she’s his favorite student. Going by that Paige is convinced that the guy wants to pork her and Alex tells her to go for it.

At Degrassi ,Manny is wearing a cowboy hat that all sluts and skanks like to wear. It’s like a part of their official uniform. Spinner and Marco are still annoyed that Ashley is in the band and has any input. So it seems like they’re there for an interview with Liberty and her pirate nerd newspaper. The guys get instantly annoyed because Craig and Ashley are the only ones answering the questions. I guess they think they’re Degrassi’s answer to the White Stripes, except they suck. Big time.

In the next scene Spinner and Marco decide to confront Craig about Ashley and how she’s ruining the band. Craig of course get’s all pissed off and says that they did agree to her being in the band, which is a big lie. Marco then points out that she lost the contest fair and square and why should she take Jimmy’s place now that he’s basically Professor X. Craig full of attitude tries to talk to them, but they both say that if he doesn’t get rid of her, then they’re quitting the band.

So he decides to do just that. But he can’t because she just has to be all sweet about being there while they’re recording their shitty single. Craig decides to just kiss her and she leaves looking pleasantly surprised. She’s all, “I was assaulted, it was fun!”

At the Dot the boys think that he finally got rid of Ashley, but that’s when Craig tells them that he and Ashley are back together again. Even though no such thing has happened. Predictably they leave even more pissed off than before.

We go back to Paige’s stupid subplot and we can tell that she wants his hands all over her body again. He ignores her and she get’s annoyed when he compliments Heather Saint Claire instead of her. After class Hazel is telling her that she’s insane and she needs to stay out of it. Mr Wonderful passes by and Paige over hears that he’s meeting one of his bro’s for drinks at some bar. Paige decides to go, even though she’s underage.

What a surprise, we see Ashley talking to Ellie and she’s just gushing over the fact that Craig kissed her. While all this is going on, Ellie is packing up because Sean left her high and dry, so she’s fucked there. And because of that Ellie is now a man hater and says that guys suck and that they enjoy playing with a woman’s emotions.

At the Dot Craig and Ashley decide to have a talk over what happened and of course she takes Ellie’s shitty advice and she pretty much says that they made a mistake and that at least they still have the band. You can tell that Craig got his heart broken but he’s staying strong.

Outside some bar or club Paige is showing this big Asian guy a fake ID and we don’t get to see if it worked or not. I’m guessing that it did.

We go back to Craig and the band and Spinner is escalating the bullshit by saying since Craig is always changing things, he’s having Manny now joining the band as well and she’s going to be playing the tambourine. Marco makes his little statement by busting out his accordion. Ashley walks in and wants to know why they’re making so many changes because they’re recording their song the next day. Spinner asks Craig why and of course he doesn’t answer so they go on to play some truly shitty music. Not that big of a change really.

So yeah, Paige and Hazel managed to get into the bar and Paige is acting like an idiot saying all loud that she can’t believe that they made it in. Right away she spies Mr O and she actually goes up and talks to him and offers to buy him a drink. Just then his really hot girlfriend comes along and proceeds to humiliate Paige by pointing out that Paige has a giant crush on him. Paige meanwhile wants to ooze down into the floor because she’s so embarrassed. His girlfriend though acts like a real bitch and pretty much tells that bartender that Paige is just a kid and they get kicked out. I gotta say, the girlfriend showed how insecure she really is by doing that shit.

Finally it’s time for the guys to record their single and they’re all still acting ridiculous over Ashley being there. Not that I blame them though. Ashley makes things worse because she just has to open her mouth and asks if they’re really going to record the song that way and then asks Craig, like he’s making him take her side. Everyone leaves and Craig buckles under the pressure and kicks Ashley out of the band. Ashley near tears asks if that’s what the whole band wants and he says yes, except for him.

So they’re recording the song they did last year at the contest and they’re much better with Ashley not being there. As he’s singing the song he realizes that he fucked up again by breaking her heart. He stops singing near the end and he tells the guys that he has to go and be with Ashley because apparently the whole fucking world revolves around her, messing up their recording time.

Craig chases after Ashley telling her that he chooses her over the band and the recording studio. Reasoning that the recording studio will always be there, but it won’t. Yeah, that really was his big chance because Craig sucks as a musician, so does Ashley. Ashley makes the situation confusing because she acts like she doesn’t like Craig in that way and he goes away dejected, but then she smiles and tells him that he’s not going away that easy. She is so annoying with her indecision at times. God, Craig has a huge zit on his face, he needs to pop it or something. I thought Sean was Degrassi’s resident pizza face. Anyways, the episode ends with the both of them smooching and becoming a couple again.

I didn’t care for this episode, because really, the whole Craig and Ashley thing has been played out already. It’s like I said at the beginning of the review, who cares about them. I didn’t like the Paige subplot either, I was all, “Yeah, it bored me.” But I guess that’s it for the Downtown Sasquatch.


Season 4, Episode 9, “Back In Black”

Well we’re back for another review of Degrassi. After last episode’s harrowing turn of events, I had to take a break because emotionally, it was too much for me. Nah, I’m just bullshitting. I was too lazy to write another one up. But here we go again. I believe Shawn leaves in this episode. Shit, is it Shawn or Sean? I’m going with Sean.

Pre-Credit Opener: We open up with Sean proudly looking at different newspapers saying that he’s a hero. I think he’s more surprised that it doesn’t say, Wanted dead or alive on it. Ellie meanwhile can’t help being a hater and says that she can’t believe that they’re still talking about the shooting. Well no shit, of course they still would be. This just leads me to believe that Ellie has a lack of empathy. Raditch is in front of the school talking to the reporters about counselors being at there to offer people help. But please, the only people that need help are the people who were involved. Rick is as dead as Julius Caesar, so that leaves him out. Raditch is then left holding his dick when the hot reporter from the previous episode see’s Sean and pounces on him for an interview. Ellie not liking the attention he’s getting pulls him into the school. Before he can get in, the reporter says that he’s a hero and she wants to know what it feels like. Sean seeing that all sorts of girls are into him because he killed Rick loves what he’s seeing and just says, “I guess I’m about to find out home girl.”

In the next scene the Asian counselor is having some sort of hippy therapy session and Paige is going on about being worried that Jimmy not walk again. He’ll be alright, plus he can compete in the upcoming robot Olympics. Hazel is still a wreck and is crying her eyes out through out this whole thing.

Meanwhile in Snake’s class, Snake is trying to convince everyone not to hate on Rick from beyond the grave. If I was Emma I’d be all, he tried to murder me you giant twatwaffle, of course I’m going to hate him. Toby looking literally like a troll says that Rick was bullied really bad. Craig annoyed tells him not to be making excuses for him being a maniac. Snake goes on to say that they need to talk to an adult before it comes to a crisis point. But sometimes adults give horrible advice too, just look at Caitlin, she’s ruined more relationships than I can count. During all this meanwhile Spinner is feeling guilty as hell, you can tell by all his heavy breathing.

Oh boy, Marco is talking about his feelings while having a Phantom of the Opera like mask on. I have gay friends and even they would say to tone it down. As all this lame shit is being said Sean is rolling his eyes and it’s obvious he thinks it’s a big waste of time. Especially when he says that he needs that stupid shit to be over with already. Being a true Canadian gangsta from the mean street’s of Degrassi he simply says that Rick got dealt with and he doesn’t feel guilt about him dying.

Back in the Mi lab Sean has a talk with Snake and they talk about how he saved Emma’s life. Clearly seeing that he’s uncomfortable talking about such a traumatic experience Snake keeps pushing him to talk about how he really feels. It seems like he’s just about to open up to him, but that’s when Emma walks in crying, fucking up the moment. She says that she can’t take everyone staring at her, as soon as she see’s Sean she gives him a big hug and thanks him for saving her life.

Outside Degrassi Jay is going on about not wanting to be a part of the therapy session. Alex says that he may be a piece of shit with no conscience, but she needs to go because she’s also feeling extremely guilty. Jay only thinking of himself tells her to watch her mouth and not admit to anything. As they’re leaving school the reporter comes along again and tells Sean that she had an interview with his mom. In the news van Sean is watching his mom talking about how Sean is a problem child. I just noticed it’s the lady from the remake of Dawn of the Dead. Anyway’s he get’s pissed off at her show of emotion for him. Emma comes along looking for Sean, Jay tells her that he’s talking to the reporter and that’s when we see Sean hulking out and destroy’s the fucking monitor. In a huff he tells Jay that he’s driving and then orders everyone, including Emma to get into the car. So off they go to Wasaga Beach.

We come upon the B plot of this episode and it involves JT and Toby’s relationship. Or lack there of now. He comes along as they’re playing basketball and JT and Johnny Mathis can’t help being dicks to him because he was friends with Rick.

Finally we go to Wasaga Beach and it’s just popping with all sorts of people who should be in school instead of there. Sean stops the car and surprise, surprise his parents live in a trailer park. Huffing and puffing, he knocks all hard on the door to confront his mom. She tries to hug him, but he pushes her away. He starts to call her out for being such a shitty parent and that she gave an Academy Award winning performance for the cameras. She starts to cry and just says that she’ll let him go.

Now at the beach Jay and Sean are burying Emma and Ellie and that’s when Sean spots his old Nemesis. The dude looks like a guy from my old neighborhood, it’s hilarious. Turns out he’s the kid who Sean deafened by hitting him with all his strength. Sean tells Jay that the kid tried to ambush him and that’s when he fucked him up.

Back at Degrassi Toby is checking out the shrine the students made for Jimmy. Man that must be inconvenient for the people who have the lockers around it. Manny comes along and says that she didn’t know that Jimmy had so many friends. Toby points out that most of the well wishers are strangers. Toby can sure count himself as one of his non friends as well. He goes on to bitch to Manny how JT is being a shithead towards him. Manny feeling sorry for him just puts her hand on his shoulder. Seeing that he has her sympathy, he tells her that Rick’s wake is that night, but he doesn’t want to go alone. Manny should have moon walked backwards after hearing that. She asks him about JT, but all he says is, “What about him?”

At the beach Jay goes up to the deaf kid and asks him how much it costs to rent a jet ski. The kid see’s Sean and you can tell he has nothing but hatred in his eyes for him. Jay being an asshole makes fun of him being deaf and that’s when the kid attacks Sean instead of him. He goes on to say that he literally recognized his eyes brows in the paper and then tells him to sucker punch him in the other ear like he did before. Sean bitches out and starts to leave, and that’s when the kid points out that he doesn’t deafen kids anymore, he kills them. Sean tries to beat his ass, but he’s stopped by everyone there. Surprisingly he gives Sean the keys to a jet ski and tells him it’s on the house. Yeah, that makes no sense. But ok.

Ellie tries to have a heart to heart with Sean, but he doesn’t want to talk about his feelings just yet. She pisses him off because she says that their two stories don’t really mesh. She goes on to say that the deaf kid alluded to the fact that he used to bully Sean and take his lunch money and that Sean made a punk move and sucker punched him. He get’s all pissed off saying that she believes him instead. Then he really loses it and wanting to cry, says that when the gun went off, he thought he had pissed himself silly, but it was just Rick’s life blood draining out of him. Not being able to handle his situation at the moment, he has to take his jet ski out there and just ride the waves! But it looks like he can’t handle the beast that he’s riding because he’s all over the place and then he crashes into the water. He pops up head down and that’s when the deaf kid goes out there and saves him.

We go back to the B plot and Manny has a few words with JT. She tells him that his best friend needs him and that’s when JT says former best friend. Johnny Mathis points out that Toby is a major four eyed geek and no one likes him. Manny now annoyed reminds JT that he’s a fucking nerd too and isn’t any better than Toby. She goes on to call Danny Webster and that if he hadn’t ditched Toby for him, he never would have became friends with Rick. JT tells her that she has the gull to be talking about people ditching people. Manny burns him by saying she remembered why they broke up in the first place because he can never be the bigger man. Ouch, she just had to bring up the fact that he has a needle dick.

Back at the beach Emma and Sean have a little chat. Sean tells her that he’s sorry for everything that happened the previous year and everything he put her through. She forgives him and says, “Ancient history.” She mentions how they should get heading back, but he says they have to go somewhere first.

Ah, so he’s gone back to his parents trailer. I have to point out that they look more like his grandparents. I guess he has old ass parents like Shane did in Degrassi Junior High. Sean you can tell is an emotional wreck at this point. His dad doesn’t help matters by saying how long until the police get there. Sean starts to leave but his mom tells him to ignore his crack. She goes on to say that what she said to the reporter was the truth and that sending him away was the best thing to do. Sean starts to cry and tells them how Rick was going to kill Emma and yeah, we all know what happened at this point. But his real grief is that he thinks that he did indeed kill Rick. His parents comfort him saying that it’s alright and that he’s home.

It’s time for Rick’s wake and it seems like it’s a closed casket. I guess no one wanted to see Degrassi’s newest demon at rest. Toby walks in with Manny who is dressed so inappropriately for a funeral. She’s probably going to twerk on his casket in honor of Rick. It’s awkward as hell when Rick’s mom makes a scene in front of everyone though. Just then, JT walks in and tells his mom how sorry he was about what happened to Rick. She thanks him and asks if he was his friend too. JT ignoring the question just says that it was a goddamn tragedy what happened.

The episode ends with Sean telling Ellie that he’s staying there because that’s what he needs in his life at the moment. Ellie starts to cry because she doesn’t want to lose him and says that she loves him. But shit, where is she going to live now that Sean has basically dumped her and left her alone to fend for herself?

So this was a pretty good episode. Just goes to show you that even the most cynical and toughest of guys have their breaking point emotionally. Too bad that Sean is now out of the show because he always was one of the more interesting characters. Also, I’m glad that Manny put JT in his place by saying that he’s still a loser and he shouldn’t be treating Toby like shit. Even though Toby is a losers loser.