Degrassi The Next Generation Reviewed

Ah yes, the companion blog to Degrassi Junior High Reviewed. Each episode will be reviewed in order by a guy who loves the next generation's melodrama.


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Season 4, Episode 8, “Time Stands Still Part 2”

Previously on Degrassi, Joey is revealed to not only be losing his home, but his business is also failing big time because he’s a broke dick loser. The only good thing is that Caitlin has returned from her triumphant Aids world tour. But seriously who cares about him and his problems. Rick is the star of this two parter and his bullying has now reached a boiling point as Spinner, Jay and Alex dumped a bunch of paint over him and then they feathered him in front of a city wide TV audience. We finished the previous episode with him looking at his father’s hand gun. And now the shocking conclusion to this two parter.

Pre-Credit Opener: This episode finds us with Rick still staring at the 45 in his dad’s study. We cut to the school where Emma and Toby are talking about what happened. He says that they can just edit Rick being humiliated out of the show but Emma doesn’t think they can. JT meanwhile is laughing his ass off over the incident because everyone there hates Rick. Toby being a little toad just says that he wouldn’t think it was so funny if it had happened to him. Johnny Mathis being an asshole said he would laugh still. He then spots Rick and he’s come back to school still in his dad’s suit covered in paint and feathers. But he’s walking around like a zombie holding his back pack tight to his chest. You know he has it bad when even the extras hanging out in front of the school are making fun of him. Toby says that someone should talk to him, but Emma doesn’t want anything to do with him because she told him in the previous episode that she just pitied him and isn’t remotely interested in him romantically. Toby tries to talk to him saying that Raditch is beyond pissed off and that he’s going to punish who did it. Rick full of despair just says that they’ll only get a detention. Toby tells him that people will understand if he takes the rest of the day off, but Rick all ominous simply says that that’s one day that he actually wants to be there at school. The statement is accentuated by the tension in the music.

In the next scene we see Raditch berating the entire school over what just happened. In class Alex and Jay are trying their hardest not to bust out laughing. In Mrs Kwan’s class JT is still making fun of Toby’s loser friend Rick and says that he hopes that he’s finally gotten the hint and leaves the school. Man, it’s so obvious that JT is much cooler than Toby when he says that he’ll have to find a new gamer geek friend to look at porn together.

At the basketball court Spinner is laughing at how they got Rick back because he has a total lack of empathy. Jimmy sounding annoyed tells him to cut the guy some slack because he’s actually alright. But Spinner is still having delight over how Rick was embarrassed in front of the entire school. Jimmy asks what kind of person does that kind of shit and Spinner being an idiot admits that it was him and then starts to threaten Jimmy, but he can’t finish his thought because Jimmy get’s into his face and asks him what he’s going to do about it. Spinner intimidated starts to back away and Jimmy tells him to save the bully crap for someone who won’t fight back. To accentuate his point he shoves the ball into Spinner’s gut, taking the wind out of it. Spinner then hits him with the ball right in the face and that’s when Jimmy man handles him and shoves him against the fence. The fight is short lived because Coach Armstrong comes along and breaks it up. I swear, this show always has a fight that lasts about five seconds or less.

Oh God, we go back to Joey’s and Caitlin is asking him why he’s selling his house. Joey tells her, “I’m broke bitch!” He goes on to explain that it’s either his house or the dealership that goes, but that makes zero sense because the dealership is also folding because he just sells cheap used cars to clueless foreigners.

Mercifully we go back to Degrassi where everyone in the cafeteria is dying from laughter at the sight of Rick just standing there looking like a lunatic. Paige comes up to him and surprises everyone by actually not being her usual cunty self and tells him that she’s sorry about what happened to him and the people who did it suck ass. Her being decent seems to have saved her life because it’s obvious that Rick was there to fucking kill her, but he seems to have had a change of heart and tells her that he’s sorry for what he did to Terri. Finally he goes to his locker and puts the backpack in there and his father’s paint covered coat.

Next we have an awkward scene between Caitlin and Sidney. Caitlin tells her that she just got back that morning and she saw Joey’s house for sale with her name on the sign. Sidney tells her to cool her tits and she’s just doing it as a favor to Joey. Caitlin then asks her how much she wants for the joint and Sidney says, about $400,000. Caitlin knowing that the place isn’t worth that much offers $350.000. That or she’s just a bitch and wants to stick it to Sidney. Sidney tells her no way and Caitlin being cheap offers $375.000. Sidney’s all, “You’ve got yourself a goddamn deal!” and they shake on it.

Rick is in the rest room where he’s washed all that shit off of his face, you can tell that he’s still dealing with trying to get over that humiliating experience. But he can’t dwell on it because he hears some people coming and he goes and hides in the stall. Turns out it’s Spinner and Jay talking about whether Raditch knows or not. Right away Jay see’s that Rick is in there due to all the paint and feathers all over the floor. Knowing that he’s in there Jay starts to say that Jimmy was involved and set everything up perfectly. Spinner then says that it was great how he got him to be in the final round for his plan to work out. They walk out with Jay saying it was great having a man on the inside. Rick comes out of the stall fuming because to him Jimmy did the ultimate betrayal.

So oh shit. The tension filled music is back and so is his backpack against his chest. Rick walks up to Jimmy at his locker where Jimmy asks him how he is. He goes on to say how sorry he is about everything and that if Spinner and Jay give him more grief, he’s got his back. Rick not able to control his anger anymore says, “Like you stabbed me in the back.” Jimmy doesn’t know what he’s talking about and says, “Say what?” As he’s saying that he defended him, Rick pulls out his dad’s piece and points it at his chest saying that he only pretended to be his friend. Jimmy starts to back up a bit and it’s obvious that Rick is about to dispense his own brand of justice because he says like a psycho, “You made me do this.” Jimmy starts to run away but he doesn’t get far. Rick somehow managed to hit him in his back even though he had his eyes closed the whole time.

Degrassi trying to be dramatic as hell has cut all sound as everyone around there runs for their motherfucking lives. Craig rounds the corner and finds Jimmy’s limp body just lying there. It sounds like Craig wants to cry, whispering Jimmy’s name in disbelief

In another hallway kids are still running away from Rick’s deranged ass. Sean, Emma and Toby though act like people who have no logic and go to investigate what that loud bang was instead of running in the opposite direction like everyone else. They go around the corner and there’s Rick still holding on to his dad’s 45. It’s pretty damn clear that he’s now gone completely insane and he tells Emma that he’s sorry that he kissed her. Sean stating the obvious says that he has a gun and they should go. Rick in a rage yells at them to not turn away from him. That sure stopped them in their tracks. He continues to talk like a fucking nutcase and says that he’s glad that he found Emma because she made his list. Toby tries to talk to him but Rick just ignores him like everyone else. He starts to go off about his delusions again saying that Emma was shamelessly flirting with him and that he thought that she liked him. Sean now trying to reason with him tells him to put the gun down and that he knows what it’s like to be in his position since he hit a kid so goddamn hard he made him go deaf. He goes on to say that it can be so much worse, and pleads with him again to put the gun down. It looks like he’s getting through to him, but Rick has now gone to eleven and says that it’s too late because he already shot someone. As he says that he points the gun at Emma who’s now crying from fear. She doesn’t become his next victim though because Sean grabs the gun and they have a fight for it. All of a sudden the gun goes off and both Rick and Sean make shocked faces and fall to the ground.

In the next scene all of the cops are there at Degrassi sealing the school off from the outside world. Ashley’s mom comes running up to a Mountie and tells him that she got a call from them about Toby. For some reason they let her in and as she’s about to go up the steps she see’s Jimmy being wheeled out on a stretcher.

I love how the writers of the show are tormenting us by going back to Joey in the next scene. I remembered when this episode first aired I said to myself, who gives a shit about Joey’s B plot. He comes up to her and he’s all happy that he got a buyer for the house. But he’s just pretending, he knows that it was Caitlin that bought the house and he’s all pissed off because she just made him feel like an even bigger bald loser. He should be grateful that he has a woman that would do that for him. Thankfully they get a call about the shooting at Degrassi and off they go.

Back at Degrassi it seems like the Mounties have deployed their anti terrorist task force. We see all sorts of cops in body armor and sub machine guns. Right away we see that Sean is fine except for a minor wound on his arm. Hey look who it is! It’s Sam, Busy’s dad from Ready or Not as the lead detective. He starts to ask Toby why his friend would do such a thing and if he was teased. Toby all full of tears tells him that Rick was tormented everyday. Detective Sam then asks him if he noticed any warning signs about his friend. Acting like a little bitch he starts to cry and says that Rick wasn’t his friend and he was a psycho. Sean just seems to be in shock answering the other detective’s questions. That’s a real man there!

In what I’m guessing is the MI lab Snake is telling Emma that Rick needed help. Yeah, thank you captain fucking obvious. Emma traumatized tells Spike that he pointed the gun right at her. Raditch comes in and asks Snake if he can get into Rick’s emails, as they’re trying to look for any warning signs. Snake not being remotely professional starts to point fingers and blames Raditch for not listening to Rick and not getting him any help. Raditch tells him to shove it up his giant self righteous ass because it’s hard to be a principle to about 700 students and staff there. Snake then starts to go off on Raditch some more and that’s where Spike tells Snake to shut the fuck up already because he’s upsetting Emma and we all know that Snake does whatever Spike says because he’s pussy whipped. You know, Snake truly is a perfect asshole. He’s projecting his own guilt onto Raditch because if it wasn’t for him putting Jimmy on the same team as Rick for the quiz show, none of that would have happened.

Outside the school Caitlin and Joey can’t get in due to it being locked down still. Caitlin trying to act like a big shot says that she’s from the local TV station and the Mountie says that there was some gun shots fired inside, but that’s all he’s willing to say. Joey tries to get in because Craig is in there, but he’s easily pushed back by the cop on duty.

Inside one of the class rooms Paige is going crazy not knowing what’s going on. They start to go over theories and that’s when Paige tells them that she got a text from her mom about a shooting there. Hazel get’s immediately concerned because she see’s that Jimmy isn’t in class. We hear a knock and that’s when the Asian counselor comes in looking for Hazel. Out in the hall she tells her that Jimmy was shot and he’s being taken to the hospital. Hazel starts to cry saying that she needs to go, but she can’t because of the lock down. This scene didn’t seem realistic to me. Would a counselor really go to a girlfriend or boyfriend to tell them what happened? I mean, would that be a priority, I don’t think so. The only people that would be notified would have been his parents.

Finally the lock down is over and Raditch on the PA is telling everyone that they are to go straight home and not to talk to any reporters. But you know that sure as hell isn’t going to happen. They’re all going to stay and gawk. I know I would. Jay and Alex come out and he tells her to relax because she’s saying that she knew she shouldn’t have done what she did. You can tell that she feels guilty as hell over what happened. They run into Spinner and Jay thought that it was him who was blasted by Rick. Spinner in shock tells them that it was Jimmy. In his guilt and fear he says that he has to tell them what they did, but Jay being a scumbag tells him no because they’d all get into real deep shit. Spinner says that he’s his best friend. Jay having no tact says, ” Either outcome, I would say he was your best friend.” Ouch! But it’s true.

Craig comes out and tells Joey and Caitlin that it was Jimmy who was shot. Just then a pushy reporter comes along asking Craig if he knew the victim. He get’s offended by her wording and says that he has a name. Caitlin get’s all pissed off and pushes her away. Again sounding full of herself she says to her, “Here’s your headline, local insensitive reporter, pummeled by famous colleague.” Please she’s just famous around town and that’s the extent of it.

The same reporter starts to ask Toby about what happened and asks if he tried to stop him. Toby has another spaz attack and asks full of tears what he was supposed to do. If she knew the story she would have said that he could have acted like a man instead of cowering behind his human shield Emma. But lets face it, Toby is useless in any situation and wouldn’t have been much help anyways. It’s here where it’s revealed by the reporter that Rick died, Toby all meekly says, “He died?” The report later on that day probably identified Toby as Degrassi’s top dweeb who knew the gunman. It should have been you who died Toby, it should have been you.

At the hospital Paige is comforting Hazel as Jimmy is in the ICU. Spinner comes by but Paige shakes her head at him pretty much saying no. Spinner just leaves crying because he knows what he did.

Seems like everyone is at Spike’s house watching the news. Spike starts to go on about how no one is supposed to be shot at Degrassi. Emma get’s annoyed with her and says that she talks about the school like it’s some sort of sacred place. I’m seriously surprised that Snake isn’t all traumatized again because when Claude killed himself in Degrassi High, it was him who found his headless, festering corpse and it fucked him up royally. He goes on to say that no one there took Rick’s bullying seriously. Ashley starts to go off on Rick, totally assassinating his character and for about the third time Toby acts like a giant pussy and leaves crying. Ashley goes on to say that she wants answers and wants to know what Rick was if he wasn’t a monster. Emma simply says that he was Toby’s friend. I love how she conveniently doesn’t mention that he was her friend too.

We then get a montage of various mourners of this episode’s events. People at the school are already starting a shrine dedicated to Jimmy. I bet you anything that half the people there crying over him didn’t even know his ass. That happens all the time unfortunately. I seriously laughed at the picture they used of Jimmy that says, Why?? At the hospital Paige is telling someone that there hasn’t been a change with Jimmy while Hazel is crying her eyes out watching over him. Spinner meanwhile is also crying because he’s a life ruining asshole and the guilt is eating away at him. The episode ends with Toby and Emma crying over what happened.

So got damn! This was a pretty good episode. I would say that it’s the best in the series so far. Pretty authentic except for the whole Hazel being told about Jimmy part. The only minus of course is the whole Joey subplot, but they wrapped up that unimportant bullshit fast. I have to say, I think at this point we all know that Jimmy ends up being paralyzed from being shot. But as I was watching this it was clear that he was hit more to the side of his back. Now either the bullet ricocheted off his ribs or he has that spinal disease where he has a curved one. Either way, I call bullshit, but ok, he’s now paralyzed for life because of it. All that being said, I think Degrassi was trying to spread the message that people can do awful things but they can still turn their lives around and actually change. But this episode threw that shit right out the window with Rick shooting Jimmy and attempting to Murder Emma as well. Sorry if this one was a bit wordy guys, I guess I had a lot of thoughts on it.

 

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Season 4, Episode 5, “Anywhere I Lay My Head”

Ellie’s drunken wreak of a mother makes a return while Manny throws a school car wash.

Pre-Credit Opener: We see Sean and Ellie waking up from a pretty intense study session. Ellie is instantly flipping out because she was supposed to have been home at 11. Sean checks his phone and big surprise, no one called because her mom was too busy getting hammered to give a fuck where her daughter was. Sean mentions the fact that she’s a lousy drunk and Ellie get’s pissed and says she doesn’t want to talk about it. That’s when Sean get’s the brilliant idea of having her move in with her. I don’t know why, she’s a big time downer.

In the next scene Ashley is stressing about the fact that her dad is bringing his boyfriend for parents night. Ellie being completely self centered ignores what Ashley has to say and brings up the fact that Sean asked her to move in. Ashley being negative says that she can’t. But it seems like Ellie is desperate to move out because her mom is a raging alcoholic.

Manny meanwhile is trying to talk to Spinner who completely ignores her, but that’s when she comes with the idea of having the Downtown Sasquatch play some jams while they wash cars in their bikini’s to raise some money for their new uniforms. Spinner tells her that it’s not just his band, they’ll need to ask Craig. Manny says that it’ll be awkward as hell seeing how he knocked her up and then she aborted their love child. After some pathetic begging, Spinner says that he’ll see what he can do.

In the library Sean is already pissed at Ellie because she keeps making excuses for not moving in with him. Ellie has this stupid idea of just having dinners with him and her going home. But that’s when he tells her that he loves her and for her to just move in for fucks sake! But oh, she breaks his heart by telling him no and that her mom needs her.

It seems like it’s already time for parents night and Ellie is flicking her rubber band on her wrist like crazy due to anxiety. Shit who can blame her, right away you can tell that her mom is drunk as shit and she’s already embarrassing her in front of everyone. Snake is so frazzled by it his face goes all crooked.

Elsewhere Ashley introduces Ellie’s mom to her dad and his lover, partner, whatever he is,  Ellie’s mom can’t help being an ass and asks them if they’re a pair’s figure skating team. Ashley’s dad full of quiet dignity and grace says that they’re life partners. Not having any tact, she goes on about how her husband is away in Afghanistan fighting the global war on terrorism and that it would be nice to have an actual man around the house. She continues to humiliate Ellie some more by saying that the gays would only be good for redecorating Bin Laden’s cave. Ellie spots Sean, but so does her mom. She goes on to make him feel bad by asking why his parents aren’t around. He explains that he lives alone. She picks that as the perfect time to give him shit about Ellie always being there and then drags her away.

Oh lord, it seems like Ashley has now joined Craig’s band and it seems like they’re now playing Reggae. Which is only one of the worst kinds of music out there right next to Country. Spinner tells the guys that they need to play another gig because practice is getting boring as hell. That’s when he brings up the car wash and they have a vote because Marco is being a little bitch about playing in front of people. Craig, Ashley and Spinner vote yea, while Jimmy and Marco say nay. Craig and Ashley get annoyed though when Spinner says that Manny will be stoked about them playing.

Uh oh. We see Ellie being woken up by a fire detector and holy shit! Her kitchen is a hideous raging inferno because her mom got drunk and fell asleep while she was cooking something on the stove. Stupid Ellie makes shit about ten times worse by throwing it against the curtains, spreading the fire around the room. She drags her mom’s limp carcass out of there before they both became Freddy Krueger.

At the hospital, her mom has the fucking nerve to be giving Ellie shit about pretty much burning their house to the ground. Saying that she doesn’t want to hear anything about it because she feels bad enough already. But I think it’s the hangover that she’s talking about. Ellie trying to pull a fast one asks her mom if she can stay at Ashley’s instead of some relative who I guess lives far away. Really, we all know she’s going to stay at Sean’s instead. Her mom not wanting to drive her to school says yes. Surprise, surprise, she goes to Sean’s.

At Sean’s house Sean is helping her bring all her smoke covered clothes into his apartment. Sean mentions that his CD collection just doubled, but I doubt he’d want to listen to KD Lang and Sarah McLachlan. But shit, is he wrong, it’s actually Ellie’s well organized cutting kit. In it she has so many ways to cut herself, it’s insane. Trying to distract him, she mentions that they should get a pet. Sean ignoring her says that he thought that she stopped cutting herself. She says that she isn’t, but she just had to save it because it brings bitter memories to her and she thrives on dwelling in the abyss. Anyways, Sean says that he’ll sleep on the couch while she get’s the bed.

It’s finally time for the car wash where we’re introduced to a new character named Darcy. Spinner welcomes her by wetting her down in her bikini. Manny comes along and thanks Craig for taking pictures and playing the car wash. Ashley meanwhile get’s jealous because Craig can’t stop looking at her tits. Spinner comes along and plays around with Manny, getting Craig a bit jealous too. God these people.

Sitting on the steps Marco asks her how her mom is and Ellie seems to be glad to be away from her for a while. Which is telling.  Marco then get’s weird and pretty much asks her if they did the nasty at his place, where Ellie says no like she’s all disgusted.

The car wash continues with a couple of dirty old men looking at all the hot teenage flesh on display while Craig and his band play some truly shitty reggae. They’re pretty bad too, so bad that I was wishing that someone would throw water on them by accident so that they would get electrocuted like in Carrie. Rick of all people comes by in his mom’s Family Truckster and says that he’s there to support a good cause. They all get instantly pissed off and Jimmy tells him to leave before he shoots him full of water. Rick seeing that it was a horrible idea leaves, but not before Jimmy wets his car. So hey, I say Rick wins in this one, he got a free car wash. Meanwhile it’s obvious that Manny and Spinner are flirting with each other and Craig doesn’t like it one bit.

Later on at Sean’s, the Degrassi kids are having a party. Too bad the Montreal Crew isn’t there, because they’re just so hardcore. Anyways Jay and Alex are being real fucking assholes and Jay mentions that it’s really a bon voyage, thanks for all the sex party. But we all know that Ellie is kind of a prude and no sex was had. Bummed out Ellie mentions to Sean that she doesn’t want to go back to her mom, Sean being the loyal boyfriend says that she doesn’t have to. And that’s where her mom comes into the room and fucks everything up.

She begins by once again embarrassing Ellie into smithereens. Ellie being a typical child of such a shitty environment just shakes her head yes and is full of tears when her mom asks her that she’s been staying at Sean’s instead of Ashley’s. She starts to drag her ass out, but Sean stops her and says that it’s better if Ellie stays there with him. Not skipping a beat, she slaps the shit out of him and that’s pretty much the end of that party.

Back at the burnt out hulk that was their home, her mom tries to be all optimistic about the fact that she almost burned the whole house to the ground and almost killed the both of them. Ellie upset just mentions that she pimped slapped Sean and that’s where she starts to do her thing with the rubber band again. Her mom tells her to cut that shit out because she looks like a weirdo doing that. Ellie then dumps out her cutting kit and asks her to pick a device because harming herself is the only way she can cope with her and her drunkenness. Her mom starts to cry because she shows her arm that looks like Edward Scissorhands cut her up. Ellie tells her that she’s been cutting herself and if she stays with her, she’ll start up again. By the way, I think her mom burned her eye brows off in the fire.

At the Dot Spinner and Manny are having a hell of an awkward exchange. Especially when she mentions that she’s waiting there for Paige. So yeah, all this is doing is setting up a relationship between the two of them.

Moving on, Sean is getting his lift on and that’s where Ellie barges in and says that her mom just dropped her off and that she’s going to stay with him because she’s finally going to rehab. The episode ends with Ellie telling Sean that they have a new pet and it’s a ferret. I only have one question, why does Ellie look incredibly sweaty? Plus that ferret seems like it’s breaking the fourth wall begging to be rescued by this maniac.

So this was another good episode. We were introduced to a new character Darcy, Ellie’s mom almost burned the whole fucking house down and Spinner and Manny seem to have a thing for each other. This episode, it went there!


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Season 3, Episode 22, “The Power Of Love”

So we finally made it to the season finale peeps. I think it took me over a year to finish season 3. Mostly because I would lose interest in this blog and then I would start up again because I was bored and had nothing better to do.

Pre-Credit Opener: It’s the end of the school year and everyone at Degrassi is cleaning out their lockers so they can get the hell out of there. Jimmy and Hazel come along and Jimmy is going on about going to a basketball camp in LA for the Summer. Hazel points out that he’s spoiled as hell. But he doesn’t want to go because he’ll miss Hazel and those breasts of hers. They run into Paige and Spinner and that’s when Jimmy once again flaunts his wealth by saying that he’s getting a limo for Marco’s Gay Indian dance happening that night and dinner is on him.

Sean walks into Snake’s office and Snake informs him that his grades are in the gutter and that he’s basically going to fail the class. I love how he blames Snake for him failing even though it’s his own fault for being a dumbass. But Snake having mercy tells him that he can pass if he does a project where he’s cataloging gaseous anomalies in the auto shop.

At the Jeremiah household Caitlin comes along knocking on the door like she’s the damn police. They start to have a conversation about her moving into Joey’s dump. I would think it’s a major downgrade for Caitlin because I’m assuming she has a much better place than Joey. You can tell that she doesn’t want to because she doesn’t give him an answer, the pretense being that she’s late for a meeting, but really she just wants to leave Joey’s. But she says they’ll talk later at dinner.

We cut to Jimmy’s and it seems like he’s wearing a female’s Indian clothing. I can’t believe that anyone would go to these length’s to actually dress up for Marco’s dance. I know I wouldn’t. But this is Degrassi and they’re going to shove diversity down our throats whether we want it or not.

They walk outside and a beat up 80’s era prom limo pulls up and holy shit! Look who it is. Billy Ray Cyrus, aka Cyrus! It’s pretty sad that he had to resort to having a small cameo in Degrassi. Jimmy is beyond disappointed, and embarrassed that he got such a piece of shit limo service for him and his friends.

At Caitlin’s TV station. Caitlin is busying customizing his and her’s towels on the computer instead of working. Her gay co-worker comes by and she tells him about Joey asking her to move in with her. He says congratulations, but also says that he wanted to tell her that anyways because the station approved for her to go around the globe covering Aids. Caitlin is ecstatic at first, but then get’s bummed out because of Joey. And Goddamn, she has to leave that night and be gone for about nine months. So after all that waiting, which was a year she said, she tells the guy no because that’s the power of love damn it!

Back at the MI lab Snake is giving Sean a break and he’s passing him with the lowest passing grade ever. Snake then says that he has to go to chaperon Gay Indian dance and Sean says that he’s not going because it’s not his scene. Seriously, it’s not anyone’s scene. Snake then decides to have a heart to heart moment with Sean telling him that he used to come to him with his problems, but that’s it’s ok if he doesn’t want to talk anymore. But he just wants him to know that he’ll always be there for him. Sean not being able to take the guilt any longer admits to him that he stole his computer, but that was because he was angry at the world and getting influenced by Jay. Snake looks like he wants to murder Sean, but let’s face it, Sean could easily kick his ass too. All Sean can lamely say is that he’s sorry for what he did.

So wow, we’re back to the same restaurant that we’ve seen in Marco’s first date and the time that Spinner and Paige skipped out on lunch. I guess Degrassi only has one fancy restaurant in the whole area. Spinner and Paige spot the gay waiter and they are terrified of him. Oh lord. Seriously? Caitlin and Joey just happen to be dining there too. They talk about her decision and she tells Joey yes. But she then mentions her big time assignment and that she’d have to leave that night. Joey can’t understand why Caitlin would turn it down and tells her to accept it because it’s a big opportunity. She says all sad, “I thought you were my big opportunity.” Joey seems to be doing the right thing by supporting her. But Caitlin being insane seems to take it that Joey doesn’t want her.

Finally it’s time for the dance and it’s as bad as you’d think. I love how Marco is subjecting everyone to his bullshit. But it seems like the lame Degrassi kids love it. Snake comes along dressed like a genie and over hears JT complaining about the drinks. So he makes a run to the store to get more ice. Uh oh, Ellie and Sean walk in dressed like they usually do. Sean tries to talk to Snake, but Snake doesn’t want to hear a thing from him.

Back at the fancy restaurant, the gay waiter comes along and leaves the check. It seems like he’s charged them triple because of Spinner and Paige skipping out. Jimmy for once not having enough has to borrow money from Hazel and he’s even more humiliated now. But it get’s even worse. Cyrus is being arrested for being a scumbag and now they have no ride. Or so they think. Cyrus being the big star that he is orders the police to drive them all to the dance and they do just that. Outside the school, Snake is losing it because his piece of junk car won’t start up. That’s when Sean comes along and offers to help him out.

We cut back to Caitlin at her TV station and Joey decides to confront her on why she’s acting like an ass. Near tears she tells Joey that if he really loved her, he wouldn’t want her to go. He tells her that he wants her to go because he does in fact love her. She brings up the past and says that he’s made promises before, promises that he didn’t keep. So the guy porked Tessa and got her pregnant. Move on Caitlin that was over ten years ago. But you can tell Caitlin is one to never forget. Joey then reassures her that he’ll be there waiting for her. I don’t know what she’s worried about. Joey is a bald loser who can barely take care of himself. He isn’t going anywhere.

Back at the school Sean tells Snake that he has a serious problem with his car and that he wants to help. Snake then throws in his face that he stole the laptop that Spike spent her savings on while he was fucking dying from cancer. Sean now near tears just talks shop because he wants to avoid the issue. Trying to make up for it he tells Snake that if he pays for the parts, then he’ll work on the car for free. Snake always wanting to have a suped up car like in the Fast and the Furious agrees.

Marco’s dreams are coming true by having everyone join him in his Bollywood fantasies. As he’s talking about King and Queen, the curtain that he’s been putting into the lights all episode long catch fire. So that’s it for Gay Indian dance because everyone rushes out in a panic to avoid the sprinklers and flames. At least they didn’t have something happen like in Carrie where half the cast died. Toby comes to mind. Rats. Just as everyone is coming out, that’s when Jimmy and his crew pull up to see that the school is on fire.

At the airport Joey and Caitlin say their goodbye’s and Joey says, “I guess this is it.” Caitlin says, “For now.” You can already tell that Joey regrets telling her to leave. It just hit me how absurd this show can be. Sure she can go on assignment to cover something. But for nine months? What the fuck is she going to do, take part in Aid’s research to find a cure? Caitlin can only do so much interviewing people and ruining their lives. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea that she go. Knowing her, she’ll start a revolution in some stinking shit hole of a country because she loves to rile people up.

In the last scene we go back to the school where the dance is now happening outside. Seems like everyone is having an even better time now that they don’t have to deal with Marco’s stupid theme. Jimmy for some reason is super bummed about how the evening has gone for him. Basically he just wanted to be a big shot and impress Hazel. But she knows that he’s loaded and she’s not going anywhere either. The episode ends with Sean and Snake being cordial towards each other.

So that’s it with this season. I would say that it was better than Season 1 and 2. But this still had it’s duds. Like the Breakfast club episode. As for this episode, it was alright. They did seem to wrap up season long story lines fast. You can tell it was rushed, like the whole thing with Sean and Snake. The Caitlin and Joey plot was a little ridiculous and really added nothing to the story. It’s just more Joey and Caitlin bullshit that’s been happening since the 80’s.


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Season 3, Episode 21 “Our House”

Pre-Credit Opener: Sean and Jay are at the mall looking at hip hop DVD’s at the CD kiosk and they just have to have that disc because some rapper get’s on stage on an actual Humvee. Did you get that? A Humvee, it’s so dope, they just have to steal it. But it seems like they’ve gotten a bit overconfident now because they’re actually really bad at shop lifting. They try to split up and run away from a security guard. Just as they link up again and think they’re going to make it, they get the closeline from hell. Sean now knows that he’s in deep shit because he’s such a bad seed.

Back at Sean’s slum, Tracker is super pissed that he got banned from the mall. Sean asks him what the big deal is, and Tracker tells him that he’s lucky that the cops weren’t called. I call bullshit here. If they were shoplifting the cops definitely would have been called. But this is Degrassi and when did logic ever make sense here? Tracker right away tells him that Jay is the problem and that he’ll have to cut him loose. Sean says that he can’t because he’s his homie.

In the science lab, Liberty asks JT if he has a date for the Gay Indian semi formal that’s coming up. I love how full of herself she is because she’s going out with Jay’s goon. Much like Arthur in Degrassi Junior High, Liberty thinks that she’s a dating expert now and tells JT that he needs to ask out Manny to the dance. JT thinks that his Frodo Baggin’s looking ass doesn’t have a chance, but Liberty sure thinks that Manny is into him.

In the auto shop Ellie is there for some reason, kissing Sean’s ass. Shouldn’t she be in class herself? She’s about to go I presume and that’s when Sean decides to make out with her, angering his formerly big breasted girlfriend Amy.

The next scene has JT buying two tickets for the dance. Spinner comes along and just assumes that it’s for Toby. I know I would have thought the same thing. Just then Manny comes walking by looking like everyone’s favorite Canadian dream girl. Spinner then ruins everything by saying that if he goes with her then he’s guaranteed to at least getting a rusty trombone from her. JT get’s these sad puppy dog eyes and Spinner basically says that she’s Degrassi’s biggest whore and everyone going there knows it.

It’s after school and Sean comes home to his house looking like an even bigger mess. Tracker and his hatchet faced girlfriend are packing their crap up like crazy. Sean asks him what’s going on and Tracker drops the bomb on him that he’s gotten a really good high paying job drilling oil in Alberta. Sean now get’s sad and tells him that he doesn’t want to go in some oil mining camp and wants to stay because he can lose his year. But Tracker could careless, because they have to leave right away. Seems like Sean is screwed here.

The next day at  Degrassi Sean comes along and breaks the news to Ellie that the next day he’s moving to Alberta. Ellie of course promptly runs away to go cut the hell out of her arm. At least I’m assuming, Ellie is emo as hell.

In the auto shop Jay pushes Sean who get’s a cut from the engine that he’s working on for his project. Being in a foul mood already, he picks a fight with Jay. Whoa, the auto shop teacher comes rolling in on his machine and is pissed at Sean for throwing tools all over the place. Sean tells him all about his dilemma and the teacher tells him about student welfare. Sean’s eye brow’s somehow thicken because he has hope again.

The next day Sean tells Tracker about his little plan, which involves him staying there by himself. Tracker saying that he’s doomed to failure and says that he’ll be knocking on his door by the end of the month. Back at Degrassi Sean tells Ellie all about the student welfare and she’s so happy, she starts to dry hump him in front of everyone. We then get a scene of Sean playing music all loud and eating cake for breakfast. Yup, he’s his own man now.

Back in class, Liberty asks Manny if she has an outfit picked out for the dance, but Manny says that she’s not going because everyone hates her guts there and no one would want to go with a skank like her anyways. That’s when Liberty hints that JT is planning on asking her out. JT meanwhile is looking like a major creep just staring at her.

In the auto shop, Sean is telling his flunkies all about the student welfare deal. Basically he has to go to class and get good grades. But you can tell that they don’t care about that shit. They’re just thinking that they now have a permanent place to party, Degrassi style. Sean doesn’t help matters by saying that they can come over anytime and that it’s not his house, but “Ours.”

So at that we get a montage where a bunch of horny wiggers are partying it up at Sean’s. He meanwhile is already fucking up because it’s obvious that he’s not getting enough sleep, plus he can’t study or relax because Jay and his friends keep coming over to drink Zimas.

After all that, the shop teacher is livid at Sean for constantly coming in late. Sean says not to worry because he can pass his exam easily. But the shop teacher is more worried about his other exams. Even he knows that Sean isn’t an intellectual giant.

Just as JT is about to ask Manny out, he spies Craig coming over to talk to her. Probably assuming that she’s still boning him on the side, JT understandably leaves disappointed and tries to return the tickets. Manny then comes by and asks him why he hasn’t asked her out to the dance yet. JT all full of piss and vinegar tells her that he saw her with Craig. Manny instantly get’s all defensive and is close to tears. She tells him that he was just asking if she was ok. She did abort his fetus after all. JT doesn’t believe her of course and she starts to cry and mentions that it was Craig who was cheating on Ashley and that she was just the succubus who tempted him into sex. So she’s blameless! After that JT feels bad for thinking that she was making an appointment to bang Craig again.

In the next scene Sean is trying to study for his finals and that’s when Jay comes in and introduces the Montreal crew. I immediately started to laugh my ass off  like Robert DeNiro in Cape Fear because they’re a bunch of lame, white bread looking motherfuckers. Anyways, you can tell that Sean is starting to have enough of Jay bringing all sorts of losers to his place to party.

That was fast. Sean seems to have given up on studying and is hanging out with Ellie. Ellie get’s up to take a dump and that’s when Amy comes along and is acting like a drunken fool.  She’s getting a bit too touchy feely and that’s when Ellie comes back with a huge bowl of pop corn and tells her that he already has a girlfriend and for Amy to get her nasty skeeze hands off of her man or else she’s going to cut her up with her protractor.

Uh oh, the Montreal crew are just too gangsta to handle. They start a fight and Sean tells Jay to handle it, but he get’s manhandled. Just as he’s about to get his ass kicked Alex screams that Amy is passed out on the floor. Good thing that Alex found her because this is Degrassi after all and it wouldn’t have taken long for someone to take advantage of her. Just like Bill Cosby.

The paramedics come in and take Amy away. Jay showing no compassion is only worried about losing a place to party. He asks Sean where they’re going next and that’s when Sean now having enough tells him that the party is over. Jay is all pissed off at Sean for making him look bad in front of the Montreal crew. That guy has a rep to think about!

The next day Manny seems to be wear an ugly jacket that looks like it’s been patched together from different carpet samples. Anyways, JT apologizes for judging her and thinking that she was back with Craig. He asks her out and after some trepidation she says yes.

In the hallway Sean passes by Jay and he asks her if Amy is ok. Sean says that she will be. Sean then makes his way to the autoshop and gives the teacher forms for him to sign. For some reason, Sean tells him about what happened at the lame party and understands if he doesn’t want to sponsor him anymore. But this is a dedicated teacher we’re talking about here and he says that he’s not going to be amongst the list of people who have disappointed Sean his entire life. But then, he completely contradicts everything that he just said by saying that he’s not going to sign Sean’s papers until he can prove that he’s responsible. Sean showing real acting chops says that he’s done with his partying. The teacher smiles and pulls a pen out and signs the paper. The episode ends with Sean finishing up his project.

So this was a pretty good episode. I’m telling you, most of the Sean episodes are the better ones. The whole thing with Manny and JT was pretty good too. Glad to see that her character is actually growing beyond the skank that she was becoming. But I’m still laughing at the Montreal crew. Lord what a joke. Vanilla Ice had more street cred.


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Season 3, Episode 17, “Don’t Dream It’s Over”

So we return to an Episode that “Goes There”. That’s right this is the big Terri get’s fucked up by her boyfriend episode. I’m not sure, but I believe this is the last episode she’s featured in, or maybe she makes one last appearance as the season concludes. But who cares. Let’s see how Terri get’s taken out of Degrassi. Man, what a DeBummer.

Pre-Credit Opener: We open up with Paige telling the gang that she has her parents mini van for the weekend and you know what that means. Party!! Everyone is super excited except for Terri because she doesn’t have that special someone to go on what’s most likely going to be a lame road trip. Hazel tells her, “You’ll be with all of your friends idiot!” Paige tells her to bring someone and we all know who Terri is thinking of bringing along because she is indeed an idiot.

Oh what a surprise. Yet again Mrs Kwan is teaching something that isn’t remotely related to language class. I would say she’s more of a life skills teacher. I remember when I was in Jr High we had a class called Life Skills class. And it was pretty much stupid shit like this. Rick and Terri become partners for a trust exercise and yeah, it’s pretty predictable. They each fall into each other’s arms and with that, Rick weasel’s his way into Terri’s heart again.

After class Rick tells Terri that he wanted to call her to apologize for beating the hell out of her, but he was too much of a chicken shit to do it. He goes on to say that he misses her and the fact that she hung out with Paige all the time made stalking her hard. Terri just leaves and says she’ll talk to him later.

In Snake’s class Marco is being a little brown noser and tells him that the sub that they had sucked ass and they’re all glad that he’s back. Snake is back to his old self. At least he’s not a dick anymore. Oh lord Marco and Ellie have a night of watching an Indian movie double feature. What a couple of bores I swear. Ashley points out to Ellie that Sean like most normal teenage boys wouldn’t sit through that kind of boring bullshit. Ellie says, “Why would Sean come?” Ashley points out that they are sort of seeing each other, but Ellie is adamant that things haven’t changed between her and Marco just because she’s seeing Sean now. Yeah, we all know this isn’t going to end well.

At Caitlin’s TV station Sean walks into Caitlin and Ellie’s bull session. Sean cuts to the chase and he wants to watch a new movie called Elimination Round 3. Ellie says that she wants to go with him, but she realized that she has a boring evening with Marco planned already. What’s a girl to do?

We cut to The Dot and everyone is disgusted and pissed off at Terri for bringing Rick along to their sacred hangout. Paige all full of fury says that she’s not going to be driving that asshole around all day long. Spinner points out that it’s better that they come along since they’ll be able to keep an eye on them.

Ha! The poster to Elimination Round 3 features a bald black dude and none other than motherfucking Yick Yu! Marco and Ellie come along and right away he’s acting like such a woman. Sean much like I would be in that situation is disappointed that she brought him along.

So it’s finally time for the big road trip and it seems like they just went to the local Degrassi park. Rick sit’s his ass on the hood of the van and tells Terri to come and join him. Paige all annoyed tells him to get the hell off before he and Terri put the mother of all dents on it.

Back at the movie Marco and Ellie are acting like a couple of assholes. You can tell that they think that they’re sophisticated and that an action movie is beneath them. Jay get’s so annoyed at them that he throws popcorn at Marco. Sean then reaches for some popcorn but he touches Marco’s hand instead. He probably wants to boil it because he thinks he has gay now.

The scene cuts back to the park and Paige is fuming and you can tell she’s about to blow. Rick goes to get what I’m assuming is food for Terri. She takes that as an opportunity to talk to her about Rick. Terri being a fool says that he apologized. Paige getting more irritated by the minute shouts out, “Of course, that’s what his kind does!” Rick comes out of nowhere and starts to tell Paige that she has no right to tell Terri who she can be friends with and that she’s a backstabber. I don’t know how she is in that situation. It’s not like she ever fucked Rick over like she did to Manny and Hazel. Anyways, Paige goes on to call him a psycho and Rick loses it and kicks Paige’s mini van and leaves. Terri being on Rick’s side starts to yell at Paige. She pretty much says that she’s sick of her shit and constantly being told what to do. Paige having enough yells at her to go after him if she’s such a bad friend. I gotta say, I’ve been in Paige’s situation before with people like Terri. Especially when they get back together with someone they know is toxic. It’s very annoying and frustrating, but you can’t control people. Even if they are fucking stupid.

Out in some field where a bunch of bricks are just laying around, Rick is going crazy kicking at the air in anger. Terri starts to apologize about Paige but Rick cuts off her shouting, “She does not matter!” Terri says, “Calm down day time Emmy.” He does and goes on to say that he’s happy that they’re together again. After they kiss, Terri starts to pull him along and says to just ignore Paige. He tugs her back all aggressive and says he’d rather walk back. Terri points out that it’s far walk. Rick says that she called him a psycho. Paige tells Rick that that’s just Paige being herself, which is a bitch. Rick now is starting to get more aggravated and says, “What? That makes it ok? My feelings mean nothing to you?” Terri starts to panic from his vise like grip thanks to him hulking out due to anger again. She says that she’s going back because he’s hurting her. At that he loses it and yells, “You’re not going! You’re not!!” And then pushes her and Terri fucking splits her head open falling on top of one of the random cinder blocks just lying around. At this point Rick makes a shocked face because he knows that he went way over the line. He went up to 11 with that fury.

We cut back to Paige and she’s clearly worried about Terri because it’s been awhile since she left. They come out of the bushes and spot Rick kneeling next to Terri’s carcass. Rick looking like OJ with Terri’s blood all over his hands panics and runs away. I love how Spinner made no attempt to chase him and stomp his ass into the ground. Instead he runs to get his cell phone.

At Degrassi Mr Raditch is telling the entire class that Terri was maimed that weekend and is in the hospital until further notice. Marco starts to ask Snake if it was an accident and Spinner cuts him off by saying that it wasn’t an accident. Ashley wonders out loud if Rick is in jail. Snake tells everyone since he’s a minor he’s not allowed to talk about any specifics. Spinner tells him that if he see’s Rick, his ass is grass. Oh lord Snake then says, “We can talk about our feelings together.” I’m with Spinner, get the fuck out of here with that hippy bullshit Snake. Paige busts out this lame looking get well card for Terri and everyone signs it.

Back to the B plot, Ellie is telling Marco that she doesn’t really want to go visit Terri since she didn’t even know her. And you know what? Why should she? Marco offers to go with her and that’s when Sean comes by and get’s instantly annoyed at seeing Marco next to Ellie. He makes a major alpha move and makes Marco move out of the way. It’s hilarious. Ellie now pissed off leaves Sean by himself and goes with Marco. Ellie doesn’t seem to know how to act in a relationship.

The next scene is at the local Degrassi hospital. Terri is so messed up that she’s now in a coma. Terri’s dad comes along and tells Spinner and Paige that she’ll be having surgery later on in the night because she has a blood clot. He then starts to go off on Rick and he can’t believe that little prick would hurt his daughter like he did. By the look on their faces he picks up on the fact that they knew that he was being abusive towards her.  Understandably he yells at the both of them and asks why the hell didn’t they say anything. The both of them just leave with tears in their eyes.

Outside The Dot Paige stops her mini van and starts to cry. Spinner tells her that she’s going to be ok and gives her a little smooch. At that Paige aggressively starts to make out with him. Even Spinner being a big horn dog isn’t down for this shit. Paige of course get’s all pissed off and starts with the blame game. She goes on to say that none of this would have happened if Spinner would have just left them behind like she wanted to. Spinner now angry blurts out the fact that she’s the one who told her to go off with him. Check mate!

Inside, Ellie is telling Marco that she should dump Sean because he’s being rude towards Marco. Marco points out that the only rude one in that relationship is her. Plus he’s tired of being her security blanket and feeling like a third wheel. I think he just doesn’t want to hang out with Sean’s scumbag friends.

All dejected, Spinner makes his way back to Degrassi and then he spots Rick waiting inside a car. Spinner get’s super pissed and drags his ass out. Rick starts to yell, “Spinner stop!” Spinner asks him if he stopped when he ravaged Terri. Paige then comes along pleading for him to stop too. Rick’s mom then comes out of the school and tells them to leave her son alone. Spinner just leaves crying. Ugh! I would have been like Kevin Dillon’s character in Platoon and told Spinner, “Fucking pussy! He’s laughing at you!” I would have beat the shit out Rick. But you know, this is Degrassi and it wants to teach that an eye for an eye is not the way. Spinner sits on a bench and starts to cry to Paige that he’s no different than Rick. Paige tells him that he is different because he stopped himself. *Eye roll* Whatever.

We conclude the B plot by Sean and Ellie having a conversation about their relationship. They both think that they’re dumping each other. Ellie tells him that she’s sorry for being a horrible girlfriend, and then she says, “You haven’t been a great boyfriend either.” I don’t know how she figures this, but Sean knowing better just agrees with her craziness and says that he doesn’t hate Marco, he just wants to date her.

At the hospital Terri’s dad comes out and tells them that they don’t know if she’s brain damaged or not. They all apologize for their behavior and Paige says that they should have said something. He makes them feel better by saying that they’re good friends.

Man, I must be rusty, this took me about two hours to write. Ridiculous. But this was a pretty good episode. I guess we had to have a domestic violence story and Degrassi delivered. I still say Rick should have had his balls cut off for what he did. Another frustrating thing is that we never found out if Rick was punished or not. But this is Degrassi after all and they always like to leave things open ended.


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Season 3, Episode 16, “Take On Me”

Ok all you Degrassi maniacs, this episode is possibly one of the worst episodes of the series. Definitely the worst one for this season. This is an episode that make’s me think, “Well this is unpleasant. Why do I want to be here?”

Pre-Credit Opener: Ellie comes up to the school and makes a face that pretty much shows that she doesn’t want to be there. We then see that she has some OCD thing because she starts to flick a rubber band she has on her wrist. Man she’s more fucked up than I thought. In the cafeteria Mr Raditch walks in dressed like a Mississippi Pimp. No, he’s obviously trying to dress like the asshole teacher was in The Breakfast Club. The students there are Sean, Ellie, Jimmy, Hazel and Toby. Anyways, Raditch just lays down the law and tells them to study and to think about why they’re there. Sean being a rebel burps at him as he’s walking out.

Being lameo’s they actually do what Raditch tells them to do. Except for Sean. Sean is just throwing his prized rubber ball against a wall, annoying everyone. Jimmy can’t stand it and just has to say something. Sean tells him to fuck off and throws the ball up. It knocks down a part of the ceiling almost killing Ellie. But Ellie does’t care about her well being, she just cares that it fell on her emo bag. Sean goes to see if everything is alright and Ellie acts all strange like she doesn’t want anyone near her bag.

I guess they don’t want to get into trouble so the guys are trying to put the ceiling tile back. But because Toby is a useless idiot he can’t get it back in. All of a sudden they get unbalanced and fall to the floor killing Toby. Yes! The moment that I’ve been waiting for. But no, they just fell and didn’t even get hurt. The episode would have been much better if it was one of those situations where they killed Toby and they got rid of his body and they all made a pact never to talk about it again. But they would never do something awesome like that. By the way, the stunt person they used for Toby looks hilariously bad. Anyways, Ellie helps Sean up and they seem to have a connection. Just like Judd Nelson and Molly Ringwald!

Barely an hour has passed and Hazel is complaining about the Saturday detention taking an eon to be finished. Sean rolls his eyes and she says, “Some of us have social engagements.” Sean responds with, “Like what? Combing Paige’s ass hairs?” Jimmy acting like Emilo Estevez tells him to back his shit off. Ignoring him because Sean can easily kick his ass as we’ve seen in past seasons, he wonders out loud what Hazel did to end up in Saturday detention. Ellie all of a sudden says that she got caught skipping class. They all make a face like they don’t care and who asked her. Jimmy goes on to say that he’s there because gopher balls over on the other table fucked up hacking the school computer and ratted him out. Hazel meanwhile avoids the question and runs to the rest room instead.

Oh lord. Radich must be at the peak of his homosexuality and is working out with some tight work out clothes and listening to some disco music in the school gym. Hazel walks in and he’s obviously embarrassed that she saw him doing his jazzercize .

Later on the five of them have become so bored that they start to play truth or dare. Seems like it’s Hazel’s turn and she says that she choose’s truth. Ellie right away wants to know why she’s there. Hazel being odd about it doesn’t want to say and says that she wants to do dare instead. Of course they pick out the worst dare that anyone could have come up with. She has to kiss Toby. Disgusted at first she decides to take a bite out of her shit sandwich and walks over to him. The cheesiest sexy music comes on and and she gives him a kiss while Toby is making a face that he can’t believe that a hot girl like Hazel would ever kiss a fucking dweeb like him.

Outside the school Snake is coming out of his car still looking like Lex Luthor but is looking much better. Seems like he’s finally coming back to work.

Back to the lame Breakfast Club, Toby is telling Hazel that JT is going to be so jealous after he hears that he kissed Hazel. Hazel tells him that he’s not telling him shit. Sean asks her what her problem is since it was just a stupid dare. Jimmy speaking for all of us, especially me says, “Because she’s too embarrassed to say that she macked with a total geek.” Toby knowing that he’s hated by all leaves all disappointed and back to his spot under the stairs like the troll that he is. Sean now pissed off starts to get mad at her and says that she’s a person who follows all the rules and doesn’t have the balls to tell anyone why she’s there. After Sean starts hounding her Hazel admits that she got caught looking at porn on the school computer, much to the delight of all of them.

To make the time go by fast they start to play games where they’re throwing shit at Toby. I told you, no one likes him. Snake comes in and asks them what is going on in there. Jimmy tells him that they’re all there because Mr Raditch gave them all Saturday’s. Snake then tells everyone that he’s all done with chemo and he’s ready to work again. He just doesn’t want to be stuck at home with Spike and her Devil child. So who can blame him.

Sean sits next to Ellie and he asks her what’s up with her and the rubber bands. Ellie tells him that it’s a therapy technique to help her stop cutting herself. Sean being genuinely interested asks her why she cuts herself. Being emo as hell, she tells him that it’s the only pain that she could control. He says that it makes sense and she tells him that he’s the first person to say that. She goes on to say that people talk about him too and his reputation for stealing shit from the school. He pretty much admits that he does steal. Just as Jimmy is impaling Toby with a stick Radich walks in and is super pissed to see them goofing off. Ah, we finally see why Ellie was careful with her bag, she has a tape recorder there. Why she would want to record them is beyond me, they’re all so boring.

And we quickly get the answer to that in the next scene. Seems that she’s taping them for some stupid report for either the school paper or Caitlin’s TV station. So wow, Raditch has put each of them in separate rooms for the rest of the day. That’s pretty illegal to do, especially since he’s not even supervising them. Ellie comes into each room and talks everyone into breaking out and wandering around the school. So yeah, we get a lame montage of the five of them doing wacky stupid shit around the school. Eventually they find an elevator that leads to the roof.

Being a big puss Toby is telling them that he doesn’t think that it’s such a good idea. Hazel tells him, “Stop being a bitch and come on!” Hazel wonders out loud if they’re the only ones that have gone up there. Jimmy finds a necklace making it obvious that other people have been up there before. Being romantic he gives the dirty thing to Hazel because she loves it so much. Jimmy then decides to go for it and kisses her. Else where Sean tells Ellie that he thinks that she’s cute. Sean goes on to say that she doesn’t seem afraid of him. Ellie points out that Sean isn’t freaked out by all of her problems either. I guess this is her being romantic, she exposes her arm and shows Sean all of her hideous scars. Because he’s cool, Sean just holds her hand.

Alone because who would want to be with Toby, he sees Mr Raditch and Snake walking out, talking about all the bad behavior from the students lately. Snake tells him that they’re acting like the police. They should educate them yes, discipline them when it’s needed. But that life is too short and he shouldn’t be trying to control them. It seems like he took what Snake said to heart but then he see’s Toby up there because he’s a stupid fuck. Raditch makes a run for it, while the rest of the Degrassi kids do the same.

The rest of them make it to their respective class rooms but stupid Sean locked his own door for some reason. Jimmy tries to help but it’s too late. Sean just tells him to go just as Jimmy opens the door. But uh oh, as he’s running in he drops the keys that Raditch finds as soon as he goes into the hallway. Back in the cafeteria, Raditch is chewing them all out. Since no one is going to rat the person who did it, he decides to give them all Saturday’s for another three weeks. But he seem’s to have a change of heart and just says that he’s trying to do the right thing with them. At that Toby tells him that it was him who took the keys. He tells him that he appreciates his honesty and then tells the rest of them to go home and enjoy their weekends.

Jimmy tells him that he didn’t expect for Toby to be a man and he finally gives him that high five that he was waiting for in the previous episodes. Ellie says that they should take a group photo. As she’s taking out her camera, the tape recorder falls out and they all hear Sean and Ellie’s conversation. They all get disgusted at her and she explains that it was for the TV station. Toby’s all, “You were recording us?” But please, no one gives two fucks for Toby. Sean quickly figures out that it’s about all the thefts that has been happening around the school. Sean pissed off destroy’s her tiny tape with his boot and leaves fuming. Man, Ellie is going to cut the shit out of her arm now.

Seems like it’s Monday and Jimmy and Hazel are now a couple. As they pass by she says hi to Toby. JT noticing that someone cool actually talked to him asks what happened there that past Saturday. Ellie comes by Sean’s locker and says that she was wrong for what she did. But she really wants the connection that she had with him on the roof. She gives him another tape and says that there isn’t going to be a story. Sean having warmed up to her holds her hand and Ellie is happier than a pig in shit.

So yeah, this episode fucking sucked and it was a chore just to make a recap of it. It was such an unoriginal idea and they probably figured that any kid watching this has never seen or heard of The Breakfast Club before. I will admit that it was key in that two relationships blossomed from it and Toby is now being acknowledged as being a Human. But that wasn’t enough to save this shitastic episode. It was such bad TV and I hate the writers of this show for ripping off and ruining The Breakfast Club for life.


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Season 3, Episode 15, “Accidents Will Happen Part 2”

So we continue with this emotional roller coaster Degrassi style.

Pre-Credit Opener: Craig and Manny seem to be a couple again because Manny is carrying Craig’s bastard offspring. Craig is either really giddy because he’s just that excited or he’s just that insane. It has more to do with insanity it seems like. He starts to go on about wanting a little girl and how Angela has always wanted a baby sister. Their joy is cut short because they run into Ellie who tells them to step off. Paige meanwhile is being nosy as hell and has noticed how they’re both acting now. Paige pretty much suspects that Manny is pregnant. In the MI class the first thing Ellie did was tell Ashley about Craig going out with Manny, but Paige being a shit starter tells her that she thinks that Craig got Manny pregnant. Ashley is so shocked by the notion that steam comes out of her ears.

In the 8th grader’s class JT is beyond happy that Liberty has been paired with Sean for a school project. Man, I forgot that Liberty was even a cast member. Talk about someone who doesn’t matter. She’s definitely the Female Toby. Anyways, the both of them are less than thrilled to be working together. Sean calls her a brown noser teacher’s pet while Liberty calls him a loser wigger.

In the cafeteria Craig is already showing symptoms of being a maniac. Manny tells him that she already finished her milk, but he insists that she has another for her health. Jesus, Craig is already looking up names in a baby book. Ashley comes along huffying and puffying asking them what they’re reading. Craig tries to hide the book but she just snatches it from his hands. Seeing the book pretty much confirms that Craig porked Manny and that she’s now carrying his seed. Out of spite Ashley get’s everyone’s attention and says, “Hey everybody! These two have an announcement to make.” They don’t say anything of course and she continues with, “These two idiots are pregnant.” Manny runs out of there crying while Craig just stares at Ashley. Ashley tells him, “I can’t believe you slept with her!” Hey, that’s what you get for not putting out. I’m not defending what Craig did because it was a real asshole move, I’m just saying it happens.

Manny is crying her little eyes out in a stall and she can over hear Paige and Terri talking. Terri also being a moron says that she’s almost jealous of Manny. Paige is so annoyed with her she asks if she had a brain tumor for breakfast. Paige starts to then go off on Manny saying that she’s ruining her life. You can tell that Manny is taking what Paige said to heart.

Oh lord Emma walks in and calls her out of the stall. She starts to say that she wishes that she would have talked to her. That’s when Manny points out that they weren’t really talking anymore because Emma is a self righteous asshole. Emma being decent asks her if she wants to come over after school. Manny mentions Craig because he’s being really needy and obsessive in this episode. Emma just says to bring his Arnold Horshack looking ass along.

Great, we go back to the B plot which already isn’t that great. JT comes along on his skateboard and annihilates himself in front of everyone. Liberty helps him up and invites him to a Three Stooges film festival. JT once again rejects her and says, “Oh hell naw!” Tired of how annoying she is, he tells her that he doesn’t want to go out with her. She retorts with, “Because of Manny?” She then mentions that he should move on. JT even more annoyed tells her that her three year old crush on him is played out and tells her to fuck off. Wow, the B plot suddenly got better. Finally she got the point.

At Emma’s house they’re having baby 101 it seems like. Craig is all fascinated with Emma’s baby brother while Emma shows Manny what her baby looks like at whatever month she’s at. Manny goes on to say that she can’t tell her mother because she’ll be get her ass kicked and then get murdered for having a child out of wedlock. Apparently Manny’s parents are the strict religious types. The baby starts to cry because he’s sick or something. Craig tries to act like taking care of him is no problem. Manny meanwhile you can tell is getting turned off by motherhood by the second.

Emma answers the door and it’s her new man Chris. What the hell, is there ever a time that Chris isn’t beat boxing or acting like an 80’s robot? Anyways, Emma can hear Manny and Craig struggling to get the baby to shut it’s yap so he can fall asleep. Things predictably aren’t going well. Finally Craig is seeing how difficult it is to actually take care of another Human being. Manny obviously wants to run to Planned Parenthood. You know, I barely noticed that Manny stopped dressing like a whore. I guess pregnancy will do that to you.

In the MI lab Sean is going on about the first time that Canada started getting cars from Japan. But Liberty isn’t listening because she can’t stop staring at JT and his Bobby Brady hair. Sean mentions the fact that his big breasted girlfriend Amy dumped him for some guy at a motocross. But Sean could care less. He tells Liberty, “Bitches ain’t shit but hoes and tricks.” Talk about a true Canadian gangsta. He tells her to move on and to get over JT. Uh oh, she smiles at Sean and you can tell she now has a thing for him. Poor Sean.

Outside the school Craig comes along and asks Spinner if he’s seen Manny. You can tell that Craig is manic about the whole situation, being all jumpy. Spinner asks him if he can ask him a question then slaps the shit out of Craig’s forehead. Spinner starts to ask if he’s lost his fucking mind because he got a girl pregnant acting like he’s all happy. Spinner starts to go on about how his life will be over and he won’t be able to do shit because he’ll have to take care of a baby instead. Craig now angry tells Spinner that he doesn’t get it. Basically Craig is desperate to have a family because his own family are all fucking dead. Sounding like a tyrant he says, “Manny and the baby, they’re mine.” Yikes!

We cut to Spike’s house and Manny comes barging in asking Spike what it’s like to be a single mom. Spike tells her the truth that it’s a tough, stressful life. Especially raising a kid like Emma. Spike then starts to talk about all the love a kid can give you too. Manny doesn’t seem interested in that aspect though. Especially when Spike mentions that she didn’t get to go to college or on trips. Manny says that she wants to study fashion even though I’ve never noticed that that was a passion of hers. Spike being polite says that that sounds nice and that’s when Manny, full of desperation says, “But Craig wants to keep it.” Spike’s inner militant feminist side comes out and says, “And is Craig always going to be there?” She goes on to say that ultimately the decision is hers. Manny seeing a light at the end of the tunnel is delighted to hear that.

Holy shit!! Liberty comes along and says to Sean, “You like?” Sean his trying his best not to laugh because she’s dressed like one of the Pink Ladies. Apparently Liberty thinks that Sean is a 50’s greaser. Wigger Liberty, he’s a wigger!! Sean all angry asks JT, “What is going on?” JT all smug and full of cheer says, “You’re the rebound.” JT tells him that the only way that he’s going to get rid of her annoying dork ass is to be brutal and just say that he’s not even remotely interested in her.

In the next scene we go to Manny’s house and it’s obvious that she’s ready to tell her mom that she’s a slut that’s pregnant. But she has to be careful about it or else she’ll be decapitated or something. She tells her mom that she saw her doctor and is pregnant with child. Her mom of course loses her shit. Manny says, “Mom, I’m not a little girl anymore.” Yeah, clearly. She goes on to say that she wants to have an abortion and says that she’s sorry. All sorts of crying ensues.

In the cafeteria Liberty comes along to Sean’s table and proceeds to make an ass out of herself. She tells him that they should go to the ravine and that she can get a pack of smokes with her five finger discount. Jay starts to laugh his ass off because she is the wackest, lamest person at the school. She’s at Toby’s level now. Sean tells her to cut the shit out and that he will never ever be interested in her. She runs away broken hearted. Meanwhile, their silent black friend with the do rag seems to be interested in her.

Manny goes over to Emma’s house and tells her that her mom was much more reasonable than what she thought. She’s even taking her to the clinic for an abortion. Surprisingly Emma is against this and says, “You can’t” You would have thought that Emma being a feminist would be supportive, but no. They start to talk about live and death. Emma even mentions adoption, but Manny doesn’t want to go through all that.

Finally we come to the climax of this episode. In the hallway Manny tells Craig what she’s going to do and he has the mother of all meltdowns. Craig is clearly a psychopath and tells her no, and that he won’t let her. Emma tells him to watch his hands because he’s becoming all grabby. Craig tells her to get lost and to mind her own business. Emma tells him that she agrees with him but Manny is her friend and it’s her decision. Craig being all possessive says, “It’s my baby!” Emma goes on to say that it’s her body and her choice. Manny all full of tears says that she can’t have a baby and Craig just walks away without saying a word. Emma doing the same thing.

In the MI lab Liberty is feeling sorry for herself because no one likes her. Shit, I know I don’t. Sean tells her not to feel bad because he knows someone that does. What a surprise it’s the thug. He probably just wants her to do his homework for him. Having no standards, she’s beyond happy that anyone likes her.

At the clinic Manny is having a talk with someone there about the abortion. Manny asks the woman how she will feel afterwards. The lady says that everyone has a different reaction to the procedure. Manny relieved that she’s terminating the pregnancy says that she’ll be ok. You know I’m disappointed that Manny didn’t have to fight her way through a crowd of protesters with one holding a baby fetus doll out to her like they did to Erica in Degrassi High. Oh well.

So this was a pretty good two part episode. Craig was over the top crazy in this one. He couldn’t even take care of a wet dream, let alone a baby. Manny meanwhile learned the hard way that if she’s going to have sex, she better use a damn condom next time. It’s obvious that an episode like this will cause a huge debate, but I think it was wrong of The N to not air it. Up until I saw this DVD release, I had idea that Manny even had an abortion.